Fallen Angels
by thejammys
Summary: [Post-Ragnarok / Some Infinity War fix-it] Thor has his brother back. Loki has the Tesseract. The brothers rebuild. Pairing: Loki/ Thor
1. Reading

oooooo

The goal is to keep everyone alive.

Ordinary circumstances would require kingly duties stretching Thor in ways he's not prepared for. But there's no such thing as ordinary anymore, now that Asgard is destroyed.

_It's a people_.

Thor clings to this thought as the last of his kind hurtle through space, scared and nearly helpless. The fragments of their home get further and further away everyday.

The immediate relief to find themselves alive that flooded everyone in the aftermath of the battle with Hela evaporated by the end of the first week. The children are restless, vexed with the confines of the ship's hallways and lack of proper playing space. Asgard's youth are crafty and clever, initially making the best of their surroundings and inventing games to utilize the lack of breathing room.

Their wonder and folly sours when there is no reprieve. They are used to sprawling fields, open training yards, wide rivers, and a sea that flows right off the edge of their world.

They are tormented by the vastness of space. Thick panes of glass separate them from infinite openness. It eludes them, mocks them, and makes them feel more fragile with every hour.

There is no such thing as night or day.

Asgardians were too distracted with locating loved ones and mourning those who were lost to worry about keeping time when they first departed and had a semblance of what was what.

The days blend together quickly.

Witches and mages call on the threads of seidr that weave through the universe and attempt to gain their footing. But time is relative, changing on every planet and every system. It becomes impossible to keep up with, and there are better uses of their skills.

Thor worries about feeding everyone.

The ship's navigation system functions properly, thank the Norns, and the course for Earth was set the moment he caught his breath after he boarded. It tells him they are far away from their new home.

There are provisions, basic food and medical supplies that such a ship comes stocked with, but they are not intended for such a large population. Korg aided Thor in taking inventory and coming up with the best way to ration what they have so no one will starve. Extra sustenance goes to those who are pregnant or ill. The growing children of Asgard must make due for a few weeks.

The people aren't used to this. Poverty was near to nonexistent in Asgard, and even the most humbly employed among the people were used to full bellies. Tensions arise quickly, and Thor pleads with his people to trust that this is temporary, that they are lucky to be alive, that they have already survived the worst.

Nothing but a tremendous love for their new king keeps them quiet.

The Statesman doesn't have enough rooms for everyone. There are ten private quarters and a large gymnasium type area where cargo would usually be held. Thor makes a list of everyone on board, counting families together, and says they will take turns using the rooms.

He includes himself on that list, believing his right to privacy to be no more important than anyone else's. Thor won't have a turn until just before they arrive on Earth.

Those who are still waiting for their go must huddle together in the cargo bay and use their capes as pillows and blankets. Thankfully the area is temperature controlled, as the chill from space would likely leave Asgard with an even further reduced population.

This becomes almost unbearable after a few days as something else everyone has grown accustomed to is lacking on the ship.

There are no baths.

Six small bathrooms and hand soap are the only luxuries they're afforded. The water in the sinks must be rationed for cooking and waste disposal, but Thor is sympathetic to their plight. People take hand towels and scrub themselves as they hunch over the sinks, moving as quickly as they can with the freezing water.

Thor echoes his promises about a better life and the impermanence of their environment.

The people have no choice but to listen.

They have just enough fuel to make it to Earth, and Thor has never been more grateful for anything in his life.

Except perhaps for the moment a vision of his father transformed into that of his brother.

Thor spends the bulk of his days making plans for their new life on Earth. People will need homes, food, jobs, clothing, education, and so much more. He knows exactly where they are headed: the place where he last saw his father. Thor prays that the government of the land will recognize him as an Avenger and not take the pleas of an 'Asgardian God' for the ravings of a madman.

He needs a council, to assist with the planning.

Two men and one woman he has known since childhood, who aided his father in similar matters, are on the Statesman. They lend their guidance and wisdom and their strength doubles Thor's resolve to do his job well.

Heimdall is an obvious choice, and the Valkyrie. Banner knows the most about Earth and is an invaluable voice.

He calls upon two more, who served in the palace guard, and then two healers. Thor wants well-rounded perspectives.

They meet daily, often for hours.

Thor welcomes the distraction. He knows there was no other way but to resurrect Surtur, that he and his team could not have defeated his sister.

But guilt gnaws at him.

Korg is not officially on the council, but he often offers words of comfort to Thor.

"You're doing the best you can, aren't you."

It's always a statement.

There is one voice Thor aches for, one that he cannot allow in the room, one that no one but him respects or considers.

But Loki is unusually tight-lipped.

Thor seeks him out after every meeting, intending to divulge everything he's spent the last several hours studying and worrying over, but when he spots his brother, always in the same place, staring out a window with sad eyes and a pull at the corners of his lips, Thor takes a seat next to him and says nothing.

He could pass just as many hours like this if he were permitted the time.

Ten days into their journey, at anyone's best guess for it could be nine or fifteen, Loki takes a deep breath and interrupts their silence.

"He will come for me."

"I will protect you," Thor answers instantly.

Loki turns his head to his brother and considers the statement. What was once a young fool's arrogance is now a king's pledge.

Thor expects to be mocked or for an argument to break out.

But Loki is quiet, and by the time Thor turns to look his brother is already staring out the window again.

They stay like that for a long time, though there's no measure for it.

Thor can see Loki's reflection in the glass, and he knows the image of tear streaks painting his brother's cheeks are not a distortion of light.

His stomach churns and his hand twitches for Mjolnir, wanting to destroy the things bringing his brother grief.

But Mjolnir is gone, and there is nothing for Thor to take his rage out on. So he takes a steadying breath and turns to his sibling.

"I will not lose you again."

Loki's eyes flick to him and it looks as though he might say something, but instead he presses his lips together and stares at Thor.

"Your majesty, forgive me for interrupting," comes a voice off to their left.

Thor reluctantly turns from his brother and nods to the woman seeking his attention.

Her question is simple, and she departs not even a minute later.

By the time he turns back around, Loki is gone.

oooooo

Thor isn't sure where Loki sleeps. He isn't sure Loki _does _sleep.

The part of him that wants to tail his brother and keep him within his sight at all times is drowned by his duties.

It comforts his people to see him, to be sleeping in the same place, to be eating the same food. Thor wants to provide all the comfort he can.

The people are grateful to Loki for their rescue, aware that without his arrival with the Statesman they would all have lost their lives.

But they are also angry.

They don't know that Odin's death meant Hela's release, but they know that the man they served for the last few years was not in fact their true king. Loki has never been terribly popular, and for some this is too great a lie to forgive.

Perhaps it's a kindness that Loki keeps himself scarce.

Thor knows his brother better than that, though.

After a particularly long meeting regarding their future relations with the other realms, Thor waits until all but one other person are left in the room and then puts his elbows on the table and rests his head in his hands.

"There is no crown to wear, but it carries a heavy weight," comes a low voice.

Thor huffs a laugh and keeps his head put.

Heimdall stays seated across the table.

"It's difficult to believe there was a time when I craved this," Thor mumbles, aiming his words at the metal surface below his face and hearing them bounce back at him.

"The realities of our duties are often different from what we imagine," Heimdall answers.

Thor thinks back to his failed coronation and wonders if he would have listened to Loki had his brother just come out and told Thor he wasn't ready to take the throne.

He knows the answer, but a small part of him wants to believe better of his younger self. It's the part of him that saw his brother let go and fall into a void. The heart-broken part that accepts his role in everything that's happened since even before his father banished him.

Humility and wisdom are accompanied by guilt and regret.

"Loki knew better," Thor says, rubbing his face and then looking up to meet his friend's gaze.

Heimdall smiles and says nothing.

A moment later the door opens again and the Valkyrie enters the room.

"Resting, are you?"

Thor smiles at her and leans back in his chair. "Join us, won't you?"

She cocks her head and considers the men. "Some of us have _jobs_."

It's said firmly, but she's smirking.

"Who says we aren't working?" Thor asks, turning to look at Heimdall hoping for a gesture of agreement.

The Valkyrie raises one of her eyebrows and walks toward the table. "Oh? Is there more to be said after that meeting? I wasn't sure any words were left in our language."

Thor smiles at her as she takes a seat to his left. "I thank you for your patience and contributions."

She leans back in her chair and props her feet on the table. "You can make it up to me when we get to Midgard. I expect to be well-kept in drink."

Even Heimdall smiles at that.

"You have my word that we will celebrate gloriously," Thor assures her.

"My celebration is likely to continue long after yours, _my king_."

The three sit in companionable silence for several minutes, closing their eyes and ruminating over everything spoken in the meeting.

The Valkyrie breaks the silence by leaning further back in her chair so the metal creaks.

"I never thought I would return to Asgard," she says to the room, to no one in particular.

Heimdall and Thor say nothing, so she continues.

"There were times when I would dream about getting away from Sakaar and traveling to other planets. Maybe see if they could use a former warrior with a drinking problem."

Thor opens his eye and looks at her.

"And then I would get drunk and forget about it. Go hunt for the Grandmaster and resign myself to dying out in the middle of nowhere with nothing but the memory of my former life to comfort me."

Heimdall opens his eyes as well.

She's quiet for a moment. "That life is over," she says, opening her eyes and meeting Thor's.

It's not clear if she's referring to her life with the Valkyries or her life on Sakaar, but the message is the same.

"I'm glad for this one."

Thor is glad too.

oooooo

The Valkyrie's words stay with Thor through the rest of the night, or day, whichever it is, and he reminds himself that however great their present struggles are, he is grateful for this life.

When he was a young child, Thor imagined that he would rule exactly as his father had. He would be beloved by all and the bulk of his duties would include declaring war and sitting on the throne.

He would beg Loki to play 'king' with him and after promising favors to his brother to gain his agreement the boys would wait until Odin had left the throne room and then sneak in.

Thor would climb up onto Hlidskjalf and mime that he was holding Gungnir and stare imposingly at the empty room.

"What do you propose we do?" he would ask his brother, who stood dutifully off to his right side.

"I propose we-"

And Thor would interrupt him each time to cry, "We go to war!"

Loki would sigh and then echo his yell. "To war!"

Then they would run around the throne room, in the middle of an invisible battle, slaying unseen foes with imagined weapons and glorious battle cries.

"Loki, behind you!" Thor would yell out, pretending to throw something at a danger just over his brother's shoulder.

Loki would always turn and look, committed to the game, and then cheer for his brother.

It was only when Thor would say, "Loki, it got you!" that Loki would break the illusion.

"No, it _didn't_!" he would insist, stopping his play to glare at his brother.

"Yeah, it did," Thor would argue. "He hit you right here," he would say, pointing to Loki's tiny shoulder. "But don't worry, I killed him."

He always expected to be praised, never understanding why Loki would balk at the notion of being protected by his brother.

"Oh yeah?" Loki would goad. "Well you got hit too!" he would say, poking Thor in the stomach. "And now you can't fight anymore."

"No, I don't get hit," Thor would protest.

"Yes, you did!"

"No, Loki, that's not how we play!"

"That's not fair!"

"Yeah, it is!"

"I'm just as strong as you!"

"No, I have to protect you!"

It never occured to the boys that the reason their parents were always able to intervene so quickly was because they were always watching this game unfold. They would linger, in the corner of the room hidden by shadow and Frigga's magic so they didn't interrupt the boys' make-believe, and play referee to their children.

Loki always dissolved into tears, and Thor would frown and wonder what was possibly upsetting about being protected and cared for.

He only got as far as wondering if Loki objected to being hurt before he was protected, never digesting the bit about being 'just as strong' as Thor.

Frigga would scoop Loki up and dry his tears while she murmured words of comfort to her wounded child.

Odin would take Thor's hand and take him to his room, usually in silence.

Thor still shared a bedroom with Loki at that age.

Each time such an argument would break out, Thor would stay awake, sitting up in his bed and waiting for his brother to come in.

He had to make sure they were still friends.

Eventually, Frigga would enter, guiding Loki behind her. He would head straight for his bed and refuse to make eye contact with his brother.

"Loki, are you mad at me?"

"Yes."

It was always the same question and the same answer.

Frigga knew what to expect next.

Thor would jump out of his bed and ambush Loki in his.

"Get out of my bed, Thor."

"Don't be mad at me, Loki."

Two commands, both ignored.

Frigga would sit down on Loki's bed and put a hand on each of her sons' knees. "Loki, do you remember what we talked about?"

Loki would pout and say nothing.

"Loki."

A tiny lower lip would wobble and Loki would shake his head.

"Remember I said that Thor loves you above all else."

Thor would nod, for this was plainly true, but Loki's eyes were usually shut and pushing out tears.

"Thor."

He would look at his mother with raised eyebrows.

"Is there anything you would like to say to Loki?"

Thor would turn back to his brother and grab his hand.

"I love you, Loki."

Loki usually glared at him for this and wrenched his hand away.

"Is there anything _else_ you would like to say?"

It wasn't until years later that Thor realized his mother expected his father to have instructed him to apologize to Loki.

Odin never did.

Frigga got him there though, patiently and kindly. Thor would apologize to his brother and told Loki that he just wanted to protect him because he loved him.

Loki would fuss for a bit, and then relent. The evenings always ended with the boys sharing 'I love you's' and curling up on the same bed making plans for the next day.

The last time they played that game Loki hadn't cried when Thor said he was attacked. Loki had looked at him with an unreadable expression, and then walked out of the room.

Thor resumed playing and didn't chase his brother.

After Loki fell from the Bifrost Thor replayed that day in his head over and over. He would scream at himself for not chasing Loki, for not learning that this was a wound in the first place.

But the past could not be undone.

Thor wants to bring this up with Loki. To tell him that over a millennia later he still regretted not going after him that day. But a larger part of Thor hopes that Loki has forgotten about this and isn't carrying it around on the list he's made of reasons he wasn't loved.

There is so much he wants to say to Loki. So much he wants to _ask_ Loki.

Mostly though, he just wants to be near him. He wants to feel Loki's warmth and hear his breathing and know that his brother is whole and alive. To see that there is no gaping wound in his stomach, no cold void of space wrapping him up, no invisible enemy lingering just behind him.

The first time he thought Loki dead, Thor wanted to jump after him.

He was brash, and impulsive, and only the sight of his mother's broken face was enough to remind him that he was needed on Asgard.

Frigga held him for hours while they wept together. Many nights passed with Thor falling asleep with his head cradled in her lap. Sometimes he would cry so hard he vomited, and Frigga would rub his back and try to soothe him as she shook with her own sobs.

Thor assumed that Odin didn't join them because he was needed on the throne.

Food lost its taste. Music was irritating. Even sunlight would make Thor rage, as though the sky was mocking him. He brought storms to Asgard, threatening to drown the fields and ruin the crops.

Nothing brought Thor joy.

His friends were loyal, as ever, and attempted to urge him out to train or hunt. Thor would thank them for their invitations and reject them just as kindly. Then he would wander from the palace in a daze with storm clouds chasing him all the while.

Thor thought to ask Heimdall if he could see his brother, but after hearing 'I cannot' enough times to set his stomach rolling, Thor stopped inquiring.

Odin watched after his son and stayed silent.

"Do you miss him?" Thor asked his father one morning, certain of the answer but needing to hear it.

"Who?"

The response knocked Thor on his ass. He excused himself and didn't make it out of the throne room before his tears fell.

Sif came to Thor one night after supper. He had been sitting on a window ledge and gazing out over the city.

"Are you well?" she had asked him, placing a loving hand on his shoulder.

"I may never be well again," was his reality.

"I fear this isn't normal, Thor. Your grief is destroying you."

It had already destroyed him.

Loki was everything to him, and Thor realized it too late.

He always knew that his brother was his favorite person, his best friend, his confidant, 'the one he loved above all else'.

Thor assumed everyone else knew this as well, but it seemed that such sentiments had missed Loki's ears.

Now he realized the depth of it. Knew how much more to it there was, and why this hole in his heart couldn't heal.

The great love of his life was gone.

The second time he believed Loki dead was even worse.

Thor couldn't linger on Asgard. Every bit of it reminded him of his brother, made him hope for another miracle.

More than that, he was certain now of what he felt. What he shouldn't feel.

It wasn't fair to Jane that she helped to distract him from his desires, but Thor felt helpless.

She was wise though, and knew his heart was off chasing something forever beyond his reach. They never discussed it explicitly, but she knew Thor mourned his brother and needed to let his heart focus.

When she ended things, Thor set about distracting himself. Running all the while from that which had already bloomed inside him.

There was no escaping this, and Thor feared there was no healing from it either.

He was haunted by his brother's ghost.

The mix of fury and betrayal he felt upon learning it was a lie was smothered in relief.

"I can't believe you're alive," he'd said. _I told myself not to pray for it_.

And Loki didn't seem apologetic, though Thor didn't really expect him to be.

Loki had seen Thor leave Asgard, so soon after his 'death'. Had seen him return to the woman Loki despised. It was unlikely that Loki would ever believe or appreciate the depth of Thor's suffering, no matter how Thor described it.

Now, here they were.

When Loki said 'I'm here', it had taken every ounce of self control Thor had not to fly across the room to his brother. He didn't want to risk scaring Loki away.

But he had laughed, had walked over, and had murmured, "Come here, cow," as he tugged Loki into his arms.

He expected it to feel new, as he hadn't hugged his brother in decades, possibly centuries. But there are some things the body doesn't forget, and holding Loki close felt as familiar as breathing.

Thor had buried his face into dark curls and wrapped his arms as tight as he could without breaking Loki's ribs.

Loki had hugged him back, had tucked his face into Thor's neck and relaxed against his brother.

They'd stayed like that through several deep breaths, listening to each other's heart beats and taking in familiar scents.

Then Loki had patted him on the back and stepped out of the embrace.

They had looked at each other for a few moments before Loki said, "You don't smell good."

Thor had laughed and shoved Loki's shoulder.

And the way his brother grinned at him was seared into Thor's mind.

He'd wanted to hug Loki every moment since then. Wanted to pull him close and feel his pulse, screaming that he was alive.

But in lieu of this, it was enough to hear him breathe.

This was why Thor was able to sit in silence with his brother.

It was enough.

oooooo

He's eating dinner with Heimdall when Loki appears at his side.

Everyone has lost weight in their time on the ship, but Loki has always worn weight loss differently.

It alarms Thor.

"Gatekeeper," Loki greets as he takes a seat beside his brother.

Heimdall nods at him and continues to eat.

Thor nudges him in greeting and swallows the food in his mouth. "Have you eaten?"

"Yes," Loki answers, and Thor suspects it's a lie based on the growl that follows from Loki's stomach.

He and Heimdall both raise their eyebrows at Loki, who merely stares back, challenging them to call him on it.

"You sound hungry," Thor says.

"We're all hungry."

Loki's not wrong, but Thor doesn't want to see his sibling going unfed. He wonders again if skipping his rations is some kind of restitution in Loki's mind - leaving the limited food for others. But it doesn't sound like Loki.

Thor takes in his brother's face and decides not to press the issue.

Instead he asks, "What have you gotten yourself up to today?"

"Reading."

Thor is surprised by that. "Reading what?" He wasn't aware there were any books on board.

"The stars," is Loki's simple reply.

Heimdall nods, knowingly.

Thor frowns.

There's something to Loki's voice that sets him ill at ease. There's no amusement, no mischief - he sounds sad.

Thor can't stand it.

He wants to lean in and lay his head over his brother's heart and ask Loki what's causing him pain, but there's an audience - and it likely wouldn't go over well.

"What do the stars say?" he asks.

Loki looks up to find Heimdall staring at him. Thor looks between them and wonders what unspoken agreement they just came to.

"How far are we from Midgard?" Loki deflects, breaking his eye contact with Heimdall and fixing his green eyes onto his brother's face.

"Bruce says we are many miles still, but we are on course to arrive in less time than we have spent on the ship," Thor supplies, regretting that he can't be more specific.

The council agreed that for safety reasons they wouldn't reveal precisely how far away they were from their destination, not wanting to incite a riot out of frustration.

Loki nods and then gets up and leaves without another word.

Thor watches him walk away and wants to follow. When he turns back to face the table, after Loki's out of sight, he finds Heimdall staring at him.

"What?"

"Do you know who he's watching for?" Heimdall asks.

Truthfully, no.

Thor shakes his head.

Heimdall sighs and shakes his head. "The sooner we're out of open space, the better."

oooooo

Several days later, Thor finds Loki in his usual spot.

"Reading again?" he asks as he takes a seat beside his brother.

Loki smiles at the glass. "Have you come to join me, brother?"

Thor isn't sure how to read the stars, and he suspects that Loki won't have the patience to teach him, but he is here to join Loki all the same.

"You've made yourself so scarce, I've hardly seen you."

Loki turns to look at his brother and raises one eyebrow. "You see me everyday."

Thor wonders if Loki actually can tell time with his magic and is certain that their visits are daily.

"It feels infrequent," Thor answers.

It's as honest as he knows.

"Ah, Thor, don't tell me you _miss_ me."

Thor looks at Loki, pleased to see mischief behind his eyes and an amused smirk. It's the most life like he's seen his brother in weeks.

"Every day, Loki."

And they both know he's talking about more than just their time on the ship, and Loki's expression falters for all of a second before he fixes it once more and lifts both eyebrows as he turns to face the glass again.

"We would certainly spend more time together if you allowed me into your council meetings."

Thor has to suppress a grin.

It's the first time Loki has brought it up, to which Thor is surprised. He expected Loki to _demand_ to be included on the council. To find that his brother instead disappeared for hours on end and allowed major decisions to be made without his input nearly alarmed Thor.

"After all," Loki continued. "I am the only one on this ship who has experience acting as king."

Thor lets his grin loose. "Yes, and I don't think our people have quite forgiven you for it."

Loki scoffs. "Was saving their lives not enough?"

"For some, probably," Thor concedes.

"And for you?" Loki asks.

Thor looks at his brother, meeting his gaze and wishing he had said this long ago. "Having you beside me is enough."

Loki seems pleased with this answer and fixes his stare back on the stars before them.

They sit in easy silence before Thor asks,

"When was the last time you slept?"

Loki frowns at him. "What?"

"Did you sleep last night?" Thor amends.

Loki continues to frown.

"Why?"

Thor wants to smack him. _Because you're my brother and I'm worried about you_.

"You have bags under your eyes."

"So do you," Loki fires back, defensively.

Thor holds up his hands. "I don't mean to insult you, brother - I am only looking after your health."

Loki rolls his eyes.

"You have other things to look after."

"I will always look after you first."

Loki considers this for a moment, simply staring at Thor. Then his eyes grow more and more narrow and Thor knows this face and can hear the word before it leaves Loki's mouth.

"_Really_."

It isn't a question.

Thor feels like a child again, confused over Loki getting upset at being told that Thor needed to protect him.

"Yes, Loki," is all he can say.

Loki is quiet, and Thor imagines that his brother is deciding which verbal barb to pierce him with. But instead he says, "Good."

Thor considers this a victory.

"It's our turn to get a private room tonight. I think the bed will do you good," Thor says, hoping that he sounds casual.

"_Our_ turn?" Loki repeats.

"Families take turns together."

"You would share your bed with me?"

It's possible that this is a test, but Thor doesn't want to risk anything.

"I'm quite used to sharing a bed with you, Loki."

Loki snorts. "As children, perhaps."

"I'm certain you still drool."

"And I am certain you still _snore_. I'll get no rest beside you," Loki fires back, still with that glint of amusement in his eyes.

It comforts Thor, almost lets him forget the reality of their situation in its familiarity.

"All the same, you'll be more comfortable."

"Have the sheets been washed at all?" Loki asks.

Thor gives him an apologetic look and Loki makes a face.

Loki has always been finicky about such things. He doesn't like to interact with other people's _grime_.

"We wash the pillowcases," Thor offers.

Loki purses his lips and continues to look displeased.

"Couldn't you use your magic?"

"I'm saving it."

Just as Thor is about to ask 'For what?' they are interrupted by children running by, in the middle of a game. They pause to greet their king and their prince, and then continue on their way.

Thor smiles at their bright, tiny faces and envisions a younger version of himself and his brother running through the halls.

"When will you turn in?" Loki asks after the children are out of sight.

"After supper."

Loki nods.

He looks like he's about to walk away, so Thor reaches out and grabs his wrist.

They both jump at the contact.

"Join me for the meal, won't you?" Thor asks.

Loki considers him for a moment. "You just want to make sure I eat."

"Perhaps."

Loki, never one to be told what to do, says, "I will see you after, brother," as he pulls his wrist out of Thor's grasp, and then turns to walk away.

oooooo

Thor is distracted throughout his meal.

He, much like everyone else aboard the ship, has slept terribly since the start of their voyage.

Some of it is the physical discomfort of trying to make a bed out of a hard floor. There is constant noise, from the sound of throats clearing to people getting up and moving around, and he long ago volunteered his cape to a mother who had nothing to cover herself with.

It's mostly the nightmares though. He closes his eyes and sees Asgard blowing apart, or Loki letting go, or Loki being stabbed, and he jerks awake and hopes that he wasn't making sound in his sleep and disturbing others.

Then he rolls over, unable to fall back asleep, and wonders where Loki is and what he's doing.

Tonight he will be able to listen to Loki breathe, to watch a steady rise and fall of his tummy, to see his chest bounce above his heart - it feels like a gift.

Bruce is talking to him, but Thor couldn't wager a guess about what. He's keeping an eye out for his brother, hoping that he will pop up beside him once more.

Thankfully the Valkyrie is there to keep the conversation going.

Just as Thor is about to dismiss himself to go seek his sibling, a welcome voice appears by his side.

"Brother."

Loki slips on to the bench beside Thor, sitting so close their thighs are nearly touching.

"Loki, hello," Bruce says, somewhat timidly.

Loki smiles in response, and Thor can feel how much it unsettles his friend.

"Are you ready?" Thor asks his brother.

"As I'll ever be."

"Please excuse us, tonight is our turn to have a room," Thor explains as he rises from the table.

The Valkyrie and Bruce look surprised at this.

"You're going to share a room?" Bruce asks.

"You're going to share a _bed_?" the Valkyrie clarifies.

Loki makes a face Thor knows well and before his brother can say anything Thor cuts him off.

"There is no one else on this ship I would rather share a bed with."

Even Loki looks surprised at that, but he fixes his face to look pleased and haughty.

After everything, he is still Thor's favorite.

The Valkyrie and Bruce have mixed expressions. Her eyebrows are up near her hairline and his mouth is open, but they say nothing as the brothers walk away.

"Are they-"

"Don't," Bruce interrupts, shaking his head. "Don't just. Oh boy," he mumbles as he covers his face with his hands.

oooooo

They've been in this room once before, right after take off. It was where they hugged.

It's small, but they don't need a lot of space to sleep.

The alcohol has long since been drained, and Thor briefly mourns the loss.

Loki goes to stand by the window and stares out at the stars, his new pastime.

Thor moves to stand beside his brother and wonders what Loki is searching for.

He's exhausted, and eager to climb into bed beside his brother, but he'll wait until Loki is ready.

Thor wonders if it will be like this when they get to Earth; if he will wake up to find Loki staring up at space and looking close to tears.

Heimdall had said it would be good to get out of open space, so perhaps the threat only remained as long as they were on the ship.

There would be new threats on Earth, though, and bringing Loki back wasn't likely to earn Thor a lot of good will.

As if reading his mind, Loki breaks the silence.

"Do you really think it's a good idea to go back to Earth?"

"Yes, of course. The people of Earth love me. I'm very popular."

Loki sucks in a breath.

"Let me rephrase that: do you really think it's a good idea to bring _me_ back to Earth?"

"Probably not, to be honest. But I wouldn't worry, brother. I feel like everything is gonna work out fine."

Their smiles fade away as the room is cast in a massive shadow.

Beside him, Thor hears his brother whisper,

"_He's here_."

oooooo

A/N: I will add tags as they appear in the story. Thank you for reading!

You can find me over on:

/rockleepotato


	2. Plan B

oooooo

"_He's here."_

"Who's here?" Thor asks, horrified at the expression on his brother's face.

Loki turns to look at him, wild panic in his eyes, and reaches his hands out blindly until Thor grips them.

"Thor, listen to me we don't have a lot of time -"

The Statesman shudders and the brothers look back outside, each realizing that they've just been boarded.

"Loki, I have to go -"

"No!" Loki shrieks, gripping Thor's hands tighter and keeping him there. "_Listen_ to me - he's here for one of two things and he won't leave without it."

"Loki, _who_?"

A voice booms above them, followed by a magnificent ripping sound as the ship is torn apart.

"Thanos," Loki whispers.

Thor feels his brother begin to tremble.

"Loki -"

"I'm going to die, Thor."

Thor's heart falls into his stomach and he seizes Loki closer. "You will _not_," he insists. "I will do anything - I can protect you -"

Loki is shaking his head. "Thor, you don't understand who this is-"

The sound of screaming reaches their ears and the brothers know their time is up.

"Do you trust me?" Loki asks quickly.

"What?"

"_Do you trust me?"_ Loki hisses, more insistently.

In spite of himself, Thor does.

oooooo

Thor wonders how long Loki has been planning for this, if his brother has lived with this fear since New York.

Loki conveyed the plan quickly as they ran through the halls, towards the screaming, towards Thanos.

There wasn't time to argue or correct, Thor couldn't think straight enough for it, and he was willing to agree to anything that kept his brother _alive_. It's only by the mercy of the Norns that they run into Bruce and Heimdall on their way and have time to fill them in.

It's a small favor that only a small number of their people have fallen victim to Thanos and his children. The Valkyrie stealthily led people into escape pods, cramming everyone to the brim and plugging in precise coordinates for their ships.

They're trying to be as quiet as possible, but Thanos seems primarily concerned with Thor and his brother.

If Loki knew all along that this man was hunting him, or them, or perhaps even the ship, then Thor would have liked the heads up. It would have given him a chance to make arrangements for his people so that none would have fallen.

Perhaps Loki had attempted to make such plans and only found himself unsuccessful now that the reaper was here.

Thor is torn apart by the bodies he sees before him, and feels like a failure once more.

The only ones left alive, save those who've escaped, are Bruce, Heimdall, Loki, and himself.

And Thor will be damned if he loses a single one of them.

Thanos picks him up and drags him, monologuing. Thor barely takes it in as his mind replays Loki's instructions.

He isn't sure what part of the plan necessitates Loki saying 'Kill away' and Thanos torturing him, but he's too focused on remaining conscious to worry over it.

_Trust Loki_, he reminds himself.

"Alright, stop!"

_You could have said that sooner_, Thor thinks as he blinks his eye furiously to keep himself aware.

"We don't have the Tesseract, it was destroyed on Asgard," he says.

When Loki pulls out the Tesseract, Thor does his part.

"You really are the worst, brother."

Loki instructed Thor to chide him, to be disappointed. His shock is real, as Thor had truly believed the thing to have obliterated with their realm. But he also knows that he was the one who sent _Loki_ of all people into the weapons vault unsupervised. What did he expect to happen?

Thor isn't sure how Loki is going to make the decision about Plan A versus Plan B, but what he says next will tell Thor what to do.

"I assure you, brother, the sun will shine on us again."

Plan B, it is.

"Your optimism is misplaced, Asgardian," says a cruel voice.

"Well for one thing," Loki begins as Thor hopes and prays that Banner is ready, "I'm not Asgardian. And for another -"

Thor holds his breath.

"We have a Hulk."

Loki throws the Tesseract into the air and dive tackles Thor to safety as the Hulk launches himself at Thanos.

Thor doesn't care for Plan B. It leaves too much room for interpretation, but Loki had merely insisted that his brother _trust him_.

"Let him have his fun," they hear as the Hulk distracts Thanos with his fists.

Loki has his hands on Thor's face and is looking at him in a way Thor has never seen before.

"I will be right back," Loki whispers.

Thor wants to beg him not to go just as much as he wants to throw Loki as far away from this danger as possible.

_Trust Loki._

Thor turns and kisses his brother's palm, in case it's the last time he's able to do so, and says a prayer to every god he can name that this is successful.

Then, Loki disappears.

As soon as the Hulk is defeated, it's Thor's turn.

He launches himself at Thanos, taking care to pull his attention away from his brother.

The fight isn't long, and Thor is subdued quickly.

"All fathers, let the dark magic flow through me one last time," says Heimdall's voice, and though Thor can plainly see his friend lying in front of him, the voice sounds as though it's coming from off to his right.

When the Hulk is gone, Thor breathes a sigh of relief.

_One out of four._

"That was a mistake."

Thor watches in horror as Heimdall is run through, watches the light leave his eyes, and he screams.

"You're going to die for that!" he swears before a gag affixes itself around him and he hears a taunting "Shh."

He can hear the blood pumping in his ears.

_The plan has failed_. _The plan has failed_. He's restrained, he can't grab Loki and run - and even if he could there's nowhere to run _to._

Loki swore that Heimdall would be leaving with them, and the way that the gatekeeper had looked at Loki while he explained the plan made Thor believe they had already discussed it.

He thinks back to when he asked Loki what the stars had said and caught Heimdall and his brother sharing a look.

_They were prepared for this_.

Loki had also said _I'm going to die_.

Thor can't breathe. There are tears on his face and his throat is tight, and all he can think about is how he was meant to spend tonight watching his brother sleep.

"My humble personage bows before your grandeur…"

He's aware that words are being said, but Thor can't make them out.

Then Thanos grips the Tesseract and crushes it, procuring a small stone. Thor imagined it would have been blue, but it's glowing faintly green, and he wonders if perhaps Thanos squeezed his head so hard that he can't make out anything correctly anymore.

Thanos affixes the stone into the gauntlet, and Thor hears a voice to his right again.

"Now!"

Three things happen at once:

Thor feels a hand on the back of his shirt, gripping tightly and then yanking him back.

There is a massive explosion of light, blinding his good eye and blocking all else from view.

And Loki's voice in his ear.

"_I'm here."_

The last thing Thor hears is Thanos' roar before darkness consumes him.

oooooo

When he feels his ass land on solid ground, Thor immediately turns to his side and vomits.

Loki's shaking hands remove his gag and the bile falls onto grass.

"Well done, trickster," comes a familiar voice from behind him, and Thor keens.

"Heimdall!" he chokes as he attempts to turn, but Loki is still pulling off his bindings and he can't quite complete the move.

The gatekeeper steps around to put himself in Thor's field of vision, and smiles down at his king.

"I saw you die," Thor says, not for the first time.

Heimdall turns his chin to look at Loki, whose hands are shaking so badly he is struggling with his task to free Thor.

"What you saw was a double, one made by your brother."

Thor wants to respond but instead vomits again. He sees Heimdall falter for a moment before the gatekeeper lowers himself to sit in the grass and rest his head on his knees.

He should have known that Loki hadn't revealed his entire plan, he seldom did.

When Loki at last rips off the trappings around Thor's arms he falls back on to his back and hyperventilates.

There's an overwhelming surge of emotions flowing through Thor. He turns and grips his brother's ankle as he continues to vomit.

"It will pass," Loki pants. "The vomiting."

Thor isn't sure how his brother knows, but he nods as he heaves.

"Where is Banner?" Thor finally manages to get out.

Heimdall keeps his head where it is. "He is safe. I will send word to him soon."

"You shouldn't use it again so quickly," Loki says breathlessly.

"Use what?"

Heimdall looks up at his king, appearing surprised by the question.

"The Tesseract, Thor," Loki answers.

Thor wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and squeezes Loki's ankle. "Thanos has the Tesseract-"

"Thanos has a spell," Loki interrupts as he rolls onto his side and grimaces.

"What?"

But before he can explain, Loki vomits.

"Your brother made a copy," Heimdall begins, pausing to take a deep breath and collect himself. "Thanos does have a stone, but it's old magic - dark magic."

Thor shakes his head. "What stone?"

"It will possess him, and hopefully destroy him."

"Which of the stones has such a power?" Thor asks, blinking and willing himself not to heave again.

Heimdall nods at Loki. "I believe he named it something crude."

Thor whips his head to his brother and regrets the decision when it makes him dizzy.

"You _made _an infinity stone," he says, not believing it.

Loki gulps in desperate breaths as his stomach pauses its evacuation long enough to let him answer. "Well, I certainly _tried_."

Thor gapes. "How? How did you - when did you -"

But Loki shakes his head and squeezes his eyes shut.

"There will be time to explain later, after we regroup with our people," Heimdall says as he slowly stands.

"Where are they?" Thor asks, realizing for the first time that he doesn't even know where they have landed.

Heimdall nods, gesturing behind Thor.

When Thor turns, he sees the Valkyrie walking towards them.

oooooo

The lingering sickness from travel with the Tesseract leaves Thor feeling weak for the rest of the day.

But he is king, so he perseveres.

The first task is to take a headcount and see who made it out.

The numbers are fewer than Thor believed.

There is no time to grieve, no time to mourn, he has to rule.

Heimdall can't travel to Bruce just yet, as the effects of the Tesseract have left him shaky and uneven - though he's been spared the vomiting. They use his gaze to gain their bearings.

Everyone has landed exactly where Thor intended them to, in the open field where his father last said he loved him.

They're miles from the nearest town's local government, but Thor supposes he had better alert the authorities that his people are there. He has to begin making things right.

He takes only Heimdall with him, leaving the Valkyrie in charge of keeping everyone calm and together.

It's not safe to reveal that he's brought Loki. Thor hasn't yet figured out what to do about that particular piece of the puzzle.

Walking is difficult for the pair, and they make frequent stops to keel over and pant.

They don't have the energy to speak.

It's hours before they reach their destination, and they look terrible. But Thor's people need him to represent the best version of himself - for their sake.

The police spot him first, and after they recognize Thor as an Avenger and savior of Earth they usher him and Heimdall to city hall.

Thor has to explain what happened several times.

_Our home was destroyed. Our population is small. We are refugees. We wish to build a community here._

Each time he repeats himself he loses steam, feeling drained and hopeless as more and more people shake their heads and aren't sure where to direct him or what to do.

He's grateful for Heimdall's strong presence beside him.

When they finally get on the phone with the Prime Minister, Thor gets good news.

It's hours before this happens though and night has fallen.

Thor thinks of his people, huddled together in a grassy field mourning yet again, and his heart breaks.

He wonders what Loki is doing, with nowhere to hide.

By the time he and Heimdall are climbing into the back of a police car, accepting a ride back rather than taking off on foot again, Thor has concrete plans for moving forward.

There's a small village, sparsely built up that's half a mile from where his people are now. Homes were built for fisherman, but never moved into. The infrastructure has already been laid.

It's a gift and a mercy that Thor doesn't question.

When they return to their people, most are asleep - certain now of night and day with the sun tucked safely away and familiar stars glittering above them.

Those who remain awake flock to him and Heimdall, hoping for good news that Thor is pleased to deliver.

They will move in tomorrow, with the assistance of the local police force.

There are many tears and thanks and cheers made to their king.

_They are safe_.

Once Thor has relayed his findings to all those wishing for it, he seeks out Loki.

His brother is sitting on the very rock where they last saw their father.

Thor doesn't say anything as he comes around to stand in front of his brother, reaches out to pull Loki up, and wraps him in a tight embrace.

Loki can't hug him back, as his arms are pinned at his sides, but Thor feels his sigh of relief ghost against his neck.

"You saved us," Thor whispers.

Loki shakes his head. "I doomed us."

Thor pulls back and gazes into his brother's face. "If you hadn't found a way to subdue Thanos, he would have slaughtered us all."

"Thor, I _invited_ him in the first place. He sought the Tesseract -"

"What would have happened if he found us without it?"

"He might not have found you at all had I departed."

"Departed where?" Thor scoffs. "Asgard was destroyed and we fled in a spaceship. Where could you have run off to?"

Loki looks at him like he's daft. "Thor, I had _the Tesseract_."

Ah, yes.

Thor turns to look out at the sea. "If you had chosen to leave he may still have come upon us."

He can't see Loki's expression, but he hears his brother sigh.

"In any case, we are safe now," Thor continues. "He is dead, right?"

Loki moves into his peripheral vision. "Your guess is as good as mine."

Thor turns to his brother. "You aren't sure?"

"Would you care to go back to the Statesman and check?" Loki asks, crossing his arms.

It's a rhetorical question, and they're silent for a moment.

"If he is alive, he will continue to seek the Tesseract."

Loki nods.

"I'll take care of it," he replies.

"How? Does your magic allow you to destroy stones as well as create them?"

"I'll take it off world, far away from you, from this…" Loki says, gesturing back at the huddle of sleeping bodies behind them.

Thor feels like vomiting again.

"You'll do no such thing, Loki," he growls. "You are to stay here with me."

Loki cocks an eyebrow at his brother. "I'm a liability, Thor. As king you should order me to leave."

"We will find another way."

"There _is_ no other way."

Sparks dance at the tips of Thor's fingers and he has to calm himself before a storm can come and drench his unprotected people.

"Loki, I told you I will _not_ lose you again."

"You left me on Sakaar," Loki snaps, looking annoyed at Thor's hands.

"I knew you would come to our people's aid," Thor says as the sparks remain.

Loki narrows his eyes. "You as good as left me to die there. You said yourself I was better off staying on Sakaar-"

"_You_ said that, Loki," Thor corrects through gritted teeth.

"You agreed with me!" Loki shrieks back, and Thor is grateful for the roar of the waves masking the sound so no one is jarred from their sleep by two bickering brothers.

Thor is too tired for this. Loki had weeks to bring this up and he chooses now, after Thor is weary from a battle and a day spent advocating for his people to pick a fight.

"We both know why you said that," Thor says after several deep breaths.

Loki's arms are still folded across his chest. "Oh? And why so ever did I, _brother_?"

"You were hoping I would grab you and beg you to come with me," Thor answers plainly.

Even over the waves, Thor can hear Loki's sharp intake of breath. His brother's nostrils flare and Loki glares at him.

"That is not remotely accurate."

Thor laughs. "Loki, why lie? We are here now, you have what you want - you've come home to me," he says as he reaches out for his brother's hand.

Loki jerks away and scowls. "You presume much if you think that I am so desperate to be near you," he spits back.

But Thor is no fool. He's tired, but he's wise to his brother, and no amount of spitting like a cobra or shrieking like a harpy will undo what Thor knows.

"You once told me to never doubt."

Loki is silent for a moment before he drops his arms. "That was a long time ago."

Thor reaches out to grasp his brother's neck, thumb resting lightly on his cheek, and goes for his childhood standby.

"I love you, Loki."

Loki's eyes grow wide and his lips part.

Thor gently runs his thumb over the smooth skin beneath it and and stares at his brother.

They stand there, gazing at each other, until the Valkyrie comes up and clears her throat.

"If I might interrupt whatever the hell it is you're doing," she begins, "I still haven't heard what happened today. Are we here to stay?"

Thor reluctantly lets his arm drop away from Loki and sighs. He relays everything to her, and to Loki, and then advises that they should try to sleep.

As she's walking back, Thor lingers, waiting for his brother.

"Loki? Are you coming?"

"In a moment," Loki answers, facing the sea so Thor can't see his expression.

Thor would dearly like to stay there beside his brother, but he knows better.

He follows after the Valkyrie.

oooooo

A/N: This chapter is shorter than I usually permit. The next one will be longer. Thank you for reading!


	3. A Fight in the Hallway

A/N: Thank you so so much for the kind reviews and kudos!

oooooo

As exhausted as he is, Thor isn't able to sleep that night.

He finds himself continually lifting his head to check for his brother, each time spying Loki on the same rock.

Thor wonders if he's still reading the stars.

If Thanos isn't dead, or dying as Thor isn't sure how destructive Loki's stone actually is, then he will continue to hunt the Tesseract and likely his brother. Loki's scepter is also on Earth, so it's possible there are others. Thor has to be prepared for another attack.

Once his people are sorted, he will contact the other Avengers and S.H.I.E.L.D. He needs to let them know that he's returned, that a threat may be coming, and who he's brought with him.

It may ruin everything.

They may react as Doctor Strange had, insisting that Loki leave. They may lose all trust in Thor for bringing him in the first place, for putting his brother above everyone else.

If that happens though, Thor has already decided to ask Loki to shapeshift into someone unrecognizable and pretend to obey.

_He will not lose Loki again_.

Not jumping up and running to his brother's side throughout the night is a task in and of itself. He wants Loki close to him, wants his brother to feel safe, and to know how much he is cared for. Thor wants to grab his brother and shake him and scream everything he should have said before Loki fell.

_You're my favorite person!_

_Without you I feel no joy!_

_You are everything to me!_

But he doesn't want to scare his brother away. Now that he knows Loki had a way off the ship for the last few weeks and chose to stay gives Thor a modicum of comfort, emboldened by the belief that Loki did so to protect their people should Thanos come knocking.

Perhaps now that everyone is safe though… Loki won't feel the need to linger, and this is what stays Thor's tongue.

Clearly, Loki does not need Thor as much as Thor needs him, or he would not have let Thor wander the realms for years believing his brother to be dead.

It pains Thor to realize this, because it laughs in the face of everything Loki believed that made him let go. This notion that he was somehow unloved or not enough - when Thor loves him even more than Loki does.

Or perhaps Thor is being arrogant, and Loki really let go because of their father and it had nothing to do with Thor. That their fight, that Loki hissing '_that woman'_ really didn't mean what Thor understood it to. He's never asked Loki exactly _why_ and he's fairly certain Loki would claw his eyes out if he did.

Ruminating on that fight had given Thor a glimmer of hope that Loki might have felt the same way that Thor came to realize he did. The idea was ultimately heartbreaking though, that he and Loki could have loved each other in such a way and never acted on it before it was too late.

Thor would go back and forth torturing himself. Some nights he would dwell on how rare it was to fall in love with a sibling, and therefore it was far too unlikely that Loki could have shared the same fate. Other times he would close his eyes and see Loki's crying face and could swear that between everything he was begging Thor to love him as he had Jane.

That idea died on Earth when he asked Loki to come home with him, to end the fight together, and then felt a dagger buried in his side.

Loki did not feel the same way.

Although he was somewhat prepared for it after hammering the improbability, it had nearly destroyed Thor. That Loki was alive, that Thor might get a second chance at loving him properly, only to have it ripped from him again. But he could hardly blame Loki, they were brothers after all.

So Thor buried his feelings, telling himself every day that he was moving on and getting past them, when they really only grew stronger and dizzied him. He was afraid to go near his brother, scared that Loki would see right through him and be disgusted with Thor for the truth of his feelings. It felt like an insult to Loki to harbor these desires.

And he was angry.

Loki had killed people who had done him no wrong. He had tried to subjugate a planet Thor loved and left a wretched mess of death and destruction. Worst of all, he knew Loki wasn't remorseful.

All this kept him from visiting his brother in prison. This mix of inappropriate unrequited love, of disappointment and heartache - and fear. He couldn't bear the thought that his brother was truly gone and had become this mad creature who denounced their filial love.

If he left Loki alone then it would never be confirmed. Schrodinger's brother.

That was years ago, and though Thor is still certain that the depth of his affections is not matched by Loki, he is fairly confident that Loki cares what he thinks. On Svartalfheim, Loki made sure to 'die' with Thor believing he was a hero, and that he'd done it for his brother's sake. This thought was what led Thor to take his gamble on Sakaar, leaving Loki on that planet with the impression that his brother had betrayed him yet again and things could possibly be left that way.

He had to know if Loki would come and fix it. To restore his honor in his brother's eyes.

Certainly there was the element of _saving their people_, but Loki had made it clear to Thor he wasn't as concerned about that.

He cared about what Thor thought of him.

And his bet had paid off. Loki had appeared to save the day with the Statesman, fought by his brother's side, and risked his life yet again to resurrect Surtur. Then he stayed to act out his plan of defeating, or at least escaping, Thanos.

He had restored Thor's opinion of him, and could perhaps leave now that he'd done so.

The thought makes Thor look up to check after his brother again.

Loki is still sitting on the rock.

Thor breathes a sigh of relief and drops his head down.

He isn't sure how to be around Loki with these feelings. Looking back, he knows he always felt them, but without naming them and appreciating them for what they were Thor didn't have anything to reckon with. He simply loved his brother, it was a given.

And they weren't shy with their affections. Thor was forever gripping Loki's neck, tossing his brother over his shoulder, wrapping an arm around Loki's shoulders and laughing with him. Loki would fuss with his hair, or lightly run his fingertips over Thor's limbs to trace runes for protection onto his body, and they had each kissed each other's cheeks and foreheads more times than they could count.

They belonged to each other.

Thor was a physical creature and took great pleasure and comfort in their touches. He could fall asleep next to Loki on hunts and feel his brother's love for him in the way Loki would curl into his side and grip his arm.

Loki needed words.

He wonders how starved his brother was when he fell, that if Thor had turned and said the right thing if their father could have pulled them both up.

The face Loki had made when Thor said 'I love you' earlier - Thor realizes with a pang that he can't remember the last time he had said those words to his brother, while will never forget the last time Loki said them.

_Never doubt_.

Thor vows to be freer with his tongue, more generous with his thoughts. Anything that will keep Loki here.

For even if the whole of Thor's love is unrequited, he will take what he can get. To have Loki alive, to have him near, to have him unchained - this is enough.

They are brothers, and Thor needs him.

He spends the rest of the night lifting his head to check for Loki and wondering how best to go about speaking Loki's language.

When the sun creeps up over the horizon and announces itself boldly to their defenseless sleeping faces, the rest of his people stir.

Policeman are scheduled to arrive first thing, to escort the Asgardians to their new home and collect what's owed to the government.

He had insisted in their meeting the previous day that their new homes and land would be exchanged for currency.

There was no time to grab gold or riches when they were fleeing Asgard, but the customary jewels and decorations his people had on their persons at the time are likely worth a small fortune. Thor hates to ask them to part with what little they still have of their former home, but the citizens are eager to aid in the building of their new civilization.

Stock will be appraised for value in Krones, and will first be used to pay for their new land.

As he waits for the police to arrive, Thor and the Valkyrie collect everything that might be worth something, and wait.

There are four ships in the field, and Thor agreed to turn them over to the ministry of defense. They won't be collected immediately, but Thor encourages his people to strip them of any rations or medical supplies. Anything that might aid their transition.

When a long line of cars arrive, prepared to take the Asgardians to their new home, Loki finally leaves his spot and comes to stand beside his brother.

One officer eyes him with what might be recognition, and Loki stares right back.

Not wanting to see any discord, or risk his brother being arrested, Thor steps closer to Loki and places a hand on his shoulder, hoping to placate the officers.

Thor greets the men and women and thanks them for their assistance, introducing them to his people at large and then offering the bag of goods he has collected.

A young woman with kind eyes and a warm smile takes it off his hands and promises that an appraiser is on the way and will meet them in the new town.

Heimdall guides citizens into cars and one by one they disappear down a long road.

When everyone but Thor, Heimdall, and Loki have left, there are a few cars remaining - though Thor has no intention of being separated.

He cannot leave Loki unsupervised on Earth, lest another portal come and swallow him up.

They're guided into the back of a car, and Thor keeps a tight grip on his brother's forearm the whole time. Heimdall occupies the passenger seat.

"Fasten your seatbelts," the officer instructs as he gets in, and Thor and Loki turn to look at each other and smirk.

After traveling with the Tesseract, it feels odd to be worried over something like a _seatbelt_. But they comply all the same.

When they first spot the town, Thor's jaw drops.

It's beautiful.

Nestled right on the coast, littered with tiny homes, and surrounded by a vast field of green - it's downright familiar.

They climb out of the car and move to join where their people are huddled, all with wide eyes as they take in the view.

Thor keeps his hand on Loki's arm.

"Shall we show you the area?" asks an older gentleman. His grin is partially covered by a massive mustache and beard, and the buttons of his uniform are straining to hold together the fabric stretched over his round belly.

He reminds Thor of Volstagg, and just ask quickly as he is warmed by the memory of his friend - Thor feels his absence and nearly grimaces.

"Please," he says before turning to Loki. "Stay here and behave."

Loki smiles. "I always behave."

Thor looks over his brother's shoulder and meets Heimdall's gaze. "Keep an eye on him while I'm gone."

A small voice in his mind is singing that Loki will take this opportunity out of Thor's sight to disappear.

"I don't need a babysitter, _Thor_," Loki bristles.

The Valkyrie snorts audibly and doesn't bother to hide her amusement when Loki turns his head to glare at her.

Heimdall merely nods.

"Please don't leave," Thor says to his brother.

Loki doesn't respond, but he crosses his arms and frowns.

As they walk, the officer explains that the homes were built up by a wealthy proprietor who intended to develop a community supported largely through fishing. The foundations were solid and the buildings were ready to accommodate a new society when the benefactor passed away.

The town was left to the government, to sort out, and had remained empty in all the time it stood.

Thor won't need to pay for any of the properties, just the land they sit on.

There was a large building, near to where his people waited, that was intended as a town hall of sorts. Meetings could be held there, recreational activities planned, weddings performed. The strength of the stone makes Thor confident.

Next they take stock of how many homes there are, and Thor is relieved to find that everyone will have a space. Some families will have to live together, for now at least until there's time to build new dwellings, but Thor suspects no one will object to this.

There are empty storefronts, spaces for new ones, and a littering of other things that will make the adjustment so much easier than Thor could have dreamed possible. The officer granted him the use of a pen and notebook, and Thor has taken notes the entire time.

When he returns, the people are restless and eager to see their new homes.

Thor asks for a representative from each family to step forward and meet with him so they can arrange who will live where.

It takes the better part of an hour, and then Thor tears off pieces of paper with the numbers of their new addresses written on them and hands them out. The accompanying officers walk the people away.

No one will live alone.

Even the Valkyrie has followed after the young woman she agreed to live with. The lady lost her family to Hela, and immediately expressed that she would feel safer sharing the same roof with someone as strong as the Valkyrie.

The remaining party consists of Korg, Meek, Loki, and Heimdall because he has been tasked with watching Loki.

Thor puts one hand on his hip, the other still gripping his notebook, and smiles at his brother.

Loki does not look amused. "And what do you have planned for me, Thor?"

"You're going to love it."

oooooo

The home Thor chose for himself sits at the top of a hill, with a lovely vantage point of the town. There is no throne anymore from which to watch the realm, but this is as close as they can get.

There's an upstairs apartment that Thor immediately designates as Heimdall's. It pleases Thor that the gatekeeper will have the best view.

Heimdall nods his thanks, accepts his keys, and quietly walks up the stairs to explore his new space.

The officer they're traveling with unlocks the front door on the first floor and moves to the side so they can enter. When the group steps inside to look around, Thor beams.

Just inside the entrance there is a small kitchen to the right, with an open counter that grants a view of the rest of the room. A small alcove across from it is bathed in light from the large window beside it, and just beyond is a space likely intended to function as a living room. There's space for a couch, possibly some chairs, and not much else. There is only one bathroom, although Thor isn't sure Korg and Meek even use one, and it has a sink with shelves built into the wall beside it, cabinets below, a toilet, a bathtub, and a rack mounted to the wall where they might hang towels.

The tour moves quickly with so little to see.

"What a lovely place," Korg says as they take it in.

"Let me show you the bedrooms," Thor says as he guides them down the hallway.

One bedroom, the larger of the two, is intended for Meek and Korg.

When Thor announces this, he watches Loki's face and has to fight not to laugh when he sees his brother piece out the math of where that will leave him.

"Look at this, Meek!" Korg says brightly as he steps into the room.

Loki is still standing in the hallway and frowning. He turns sharply to Thor and glowers.

"I'm not sharing a room with you."

Thor grins at him. "Come now, brother, you and I have done this before."

"Yes and it's why I'm certain I'll go mad if I'm forced to do it again!"

"Ah, Loki, you must remember the fun we had together! Building tents and staying up late telling me stories-"

"Thor-"

"Loki, I'm not letting you out of my sight."

Before Loki can puff up like an angry bird, Thor presses on.

"It's the only way I'll be able to bargain for your staying here. The people of Earth have to feel safe, and the only way for that to happen is for them to know that I've got my eye on you." Thor taps just below his eye to emphasize the point.

Whether or not Loki believes this, as it's only half the truth, he doesn't let on.

"Why did you not hand me off to the authorities? Surely your precious Midgardians would sleep much better knowing I'm locked in a cell."

There are a million answers to that. _Because I love you. Because I miss you. Because the idea of falling asleep next to you and waking up to your face is the only thing giving me the strength to not collapse with despair over our losses._

"We have a chance to start over," he settles on.

Loki looks annoyed. "To start over? So you do wish to cast aside all that came before? Funny, Thor, that you once asked me if _I_ remembered being 'raised together, playing together -'"

Thor interrupts Loki's mocking by placing his hand in its favorite spot on Loki's neck.

"You will always be my brother, and I am ever yours," he murmurs, meaning it in every way and grateful for the ambiguity protecting and revealing his secret. "I want to forgive you. I want the future I believed you and I would have, fighting side by side forever."

"You said our paths diverged long ago," Loki retorts, knocking Thor's hand away.

"Streams often split and come back together after an arduous journey."

"Are you attempting poetry?"

Thor sighs and stares at his brother. He decides to begin giving Loki his words now. "Would you believe me if I told you that I miss you?"

Loki stares back at him and then folds his arms over his chest. "No."

"And why not?" Thor asks, trying to sound calmer than he feels, for Loki had accepted this on the Statesman. Apparently Earth brought out the 'difficult' in his brother.

"Oh, let's see," Loki begins sarcastically, and Thor steels himself. "Let's begin with you letting me fall into an abyss-"

"You let go!" Thor interrupts.

"- and then after discovering I was alive your first words were 'Where is the Tesseract'" Loki repeats in a voice that sounds alarmingly like Thor.

"You were attacking Earth - I had a duty to defend it. That doesn't mean I wasn't relieved to know you lived."

"Ooh," Loki says as he forges ahead. "Then perhaps you could elaborate on why you never came to visit me in my cell if you were so _pleased_ to know I wasn't dead."

Thor sucks in a breath. He can hardly say _Because I'm in love with you and I was scared of losing you again._

"You weren't in your right mind," he tries. "I didn't know how to speak to you."

Loki narrows his eyes. "And surely practice would not have granted you any insight. Better to let me rot there where you wouldn't be _burdened_ with my madness."

"You are not blameless in this -"

"Oh, no, of course not. I never am!" Loki spits. "Never mind the decisions you make - if _I'm_ around then it defaults to my error."

"It is not one or the other, Loki. We have both made mistakes, and I regret causing you pain, but we have both hurt each other."

Loki breathes heavily through his nose and Thor sees tears come into his eyes.

"You left," he says quietly.

Thor is silent, waiting for more, and feels his heart jerk when a tear breaks free from Loki's eye and glides down his cheek.

"What?" he asks gently.

"You went back to Earth. I died in your arms and you went back to that woman."

Thor's hand itches to reach out and wipe the tear away, to grip Loki's shoulder and heave him into a hug. He's feared this conversation, knowing that there's likely nothing he can say that will change how Loki feels. But he tries. "Loki that was the worst moment of my life."

"You moved past it quickly."

"I needed…" Thor begins, unsure of how best to phrase this truth. "A distraction. Asgard became too much - I was surrounded by memories of you."

Loki purses his lips and nods as tears fall from the other eye. "I see. Better to run away than to have to think of me."

"You know that is not what I mean."

And the way Loki looks at him makes Thor pause and wonder if he brother really _doesn't_ know it. It makes Thor curse himself again for not appreciating the power of his words sooner.

"How do you mean it, then?" Loki asks. He tries to sound cruel but his voice breaks.

Thor doesn't answer right away. His stomach is churning and he's itching to call a storm and shock the truth right into his brother.

He takes a steadying breath and hazards another gamble.

"Loki, do you truly not know how much I love you?"

Loki stays silent as tears continue to fall. A wet sniff is his only answer.

Thor wonders again why Loki is bringing this up now. They had weeks together on the Statesman, sat together for hours in silence.

Silence.

And Loki needed words.

"The first time I lost you nearly drove me mad," he says, wondering if it would have made a difference had he said this to Loki after bringing him back to Asgard

"Did you search for me?"

"Heimdall could not see you."

Loki huffs and rolls his eyes. "Was that the extent of your pursuit?"

Thor is taken aback. "Loki, you fell into a void in space…"

"There are potions you could have made, magics you could have used, ways you could have called out to me."

And Thor wonders if this is Loki admitting that these would have been his actions should their positions have been reversed.

"I did not know them, brother. If I had then you must believe I would have ripped apart the realms to get you back."

"You left me to be tortured at the hands of the Chitauri."

They've never spoken of this before.

"You were tortured?" Thor asks softly, barely able to speak it.

"Of course I was tortured, are you daft? You saw Thanos - you saw him slaughter without pause. He's ruthless, Thor."

"Loki, I did not know -"

"When they would cut me open I told myself you would come, that you and that ridiculous hammer would appear and fight them off."

Thor snaps his mouth shut.

"And you barely looked. You were so quick to accept that I was gone forever. You were _eager_ for it -"

"Stop it," Thor growls, and this time he's unable to stop the sparks from reappearing at his fingertips.

"You know I expected this from father. His indifference made sense the moment I learned what I was. Is that what did it, Thor? He told you I was a monster and you were glad to be rid of me?"

Thor can't stop his hand from flying out and gripping Loki's neck and he steps forward to slam his brother against the wall.

"I nearly leapt off that bridge after you!" he shouts, crowding Loki.

Loki looks stunned for all of a moment as his breath is knocked out of him, but he's still in attack mode.

"Why didn't you?" he hisses back.

Thor rakes his eye over his brother's face. "Is that what you wish? That my life had ended with yours? Will nothing else convince you of my grief? Of my love?"

Loki doesn't have to say anything, Thor already knows the answer. And for the second time he wonders if Loki is confessing as much as asking.

That if Thor had been the one to let go, Loki would have died right beside him.

Even if it's true he knows Loki won't admit it, but the thought makes Thor soften his grip and wipe Loki's tears with his thumb.

Korg coughs quietly, as though he was trying to stifle it, and though it draws them out of their little world long enough to remember that there is an audience, they don't break their gaze from one another.

Thor lowers his voice, so that only Loki will hear, and moves in so their noses are mere centimeters apart.

"We cannot undo the past, Loki. But I would have you by my side as we move forward."

Loki stares at Thor's eye and Thor feels like he's a book being read.

"I want my own room."

And Thor knows the fight is over, for now. Their misunderstandings and hurts will come up again. He huffs a quiet laugh and drops his forehead against Loki's.

They stay like that for a beat until Loki lightly pushes him away.

"You still don't smell good."

At this, Thor belly laughs. "I've been assured we will have running water by this evening and then you'll be forced to suffer my odor no more."

"I highly doubt this is the end of it."

Loki quickly turns to dry his face as Korg and Meek enter the hallway and Thor steps in front of his brother to grant him privacy.

"I think Meek and I will get bunk beds," Korg says happily.

Thor claps a hand on his back and nods. "Excellent. I was told we would be placing an order for furniture today, and perhaps might even have it by tomorrow."

This does mean another night spent without a bed, and Thor has to wait to see what their valuables are worth before he can make any purchases, but it's the best he can do for now.

The group travels upstairs to see Heimdall's space, and Thor sees Loki is annoyed that the gatekeeper has so much room all to himself.

An hour after everyone has met their new home, food is brought to the town.

A local soup kitchen with a mobile service has brought basic sustenance, along with a van filled entirely with bottled water.

The people are weepy with gratitude.

As they eat, Thor meets with the men who will deliver power, gas, and running water to the new homes. Then with the woman responsible for exchanging their goods for currency. She has brought with her the names of wealthy collectors and a few antiques dealers. She sends them photos of the goods on her phone before speaking to them to arrange a price.

"If we could arrange for an auction I could get you a much better price for much of this…" she says as she delicately handles his armor.

Thor shakes his head. There isn't time.

Thankfully they are left with a bundle.

It's enough to pay for the land and provide basic accommodations in the homes.

He's advised to order everything in bulk, as it will be less expensive that way.

Beds, mattresses, tables, chairs, sofas, dressers, cookware, dishes, silverware, bedding, towels, toiletries - Thor consults his list of names frequently and ensures that every household has the same stock.

Refrigerators, ovens, and microwaves are so expensive they clear a third of the budget easily.

Things like rugs, curtains, art, entertainment, and trinkets will have to come at a later time, and likely at the expense of the individual.

Food and clothing are trickier, and Thor opts to give an allowance to each household so that they may make their own decisions about what suits them best.

He can't very well take all of his people into a store at once, but the clothing they select from a catalogue and the officers take their food budgets and offer to run that errand themselves.

By nightfall they have some of the basics: like toiletries and linens. They may not have a bed to sleep in yet, but they will have something to cover themselves with.

And everyone is eager for a bath.

Their kitchens are somewhat stocked, filled with foods both foreign and familiar. The cookware and dishes won't arrive until tomorrow, so people opt for fruit and sweets that don't require preparation.

Before turning in for the evening, Thor stops by every home to check after the citizens.

He still has the notebook and writes down their concerns. They will have a meeting tomorrow morning where Thor intends to address everything.

When he finally returns home, Korg and Meek are asleep in the living room.

Thor finds Loki lying down on the floor in the center of their bedroom with his arms behind his head.

His eyes are wide open.

"You should have a bath, Loki," Thor says as he sits down beside his brother.

"_You_ are the one who needs a bath, Thor."

"I plan to take one, but I was going to let you go first," Thor says as he leans forward to tug off his shoes.

When Loki doesn't say anything Thor turns to look at him and sees his brother staring at him.

"Are you alright?" Thor asks.

"Are you truly not going to send me back to prison?" Loki asks.

Thor sincerely hopes this isn't the beginning of another argument, as he is very tired.

"No, Loki, I am not," he answers firmly.

Loki considers him for a moment. "What if your friends demand it?"

"The Avengers? I intend to tell them of your acts of heroism, and Banner will be able to back me up."

"Heroism," Loki repeats with a scoff.

Thor succeeds in getting his boots off and then lies down to mirror his brother. They turn their heads to look at each other and for a moment Thor can pretend they are children again, tucking into the same bed after a long day of play, preparing for Loki to tell him a story.

"Perhaps you could join the Avengers, your magic would be useful," Thor says with a tiny grin.

Loki narrows his eyes. "I will _never_ work for them. They locked me in a cell."

"Well, you were attacking Earth, but alright."

Loki kicks him for it.

"Do you intend to rejoin them?" Loki asks, shifting his arms a bit.

"If they need me. I owe Earth protection in exchange for welcoming our people."

Loki hums. After a moment of quiet he turns his head back to face the ceiling and closes his eyes.

Thor continues to stare at his brother.

He really doesn't know how to be around Loki with these feelings. His want is to trace his fingertip from the edge of Loki's hairline, down over his nose, and across his lovely lips. He wants to haul his brother into the bath and take his time washing every inch of his Loki's skin, taking stock of his wounds and healing them with kisses.

But he does neither of these things. He stays quiet.

Sharing a room with his brother is already a luxury.

It may lead to another argument when a single bed is delivered. But Thor can at least excuse this with the reality of a budget.

No need for Loki to suspect how excited Thor is by the prospect.

He hears his brother's stomach growl loudly and frowns.

"Loki, have you eaten anything today?"

Loki keeps his eyes shut and shakes his head.

"There is food in the kitchen, I could grab something for you -"

"I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself."

Thor rolls his eye, though Loki can't see it. "Capable yes, but are you?"

He sees Loki open his eyes and side eye him, but he doesn't turn to face his brother.

"I'm fine, Thor."

Loki's stomach speaks up again to argue, forever betraying him.

"We have grapes," Thor offers.

"I will have some before bed," Loki consents, placing a hand on his stomach as though he means to stop the symphony its letting loose.

"Will you sleep tonight?"

Loki snaps his head to the side and glares. "Why are you so obsessed over my welfare?"

Thor meets Loki's gaze and knocks his brother's foot with his own. Given their earlier conversation, Loki is unlikely to believe 'Because I love you, dumbass', and though Thor had told him _I will always look after you first_, he doesn't think reminding Loki of this will suffice.

"You didn't sleep last night," Thor diverts, "And I suspect you weren't resting during our time in space either."

Loki hadn't confirmed it the last time Thor brought this up, but his eye bags were much like his stomach and told the truth when Loki didn't.

"I had other things to worry about," Loki says, breaking their eye contact.

"You're safe now, Loki," Thor says, and he hopes that it's true.

Loki rolls his eyes, and Thor knows it's because he doesn't really have the authority to proclaim their safety.

But Thor will do what he can to make Loki feel secure.

"I could stay awake while you sleep. Keep an eye out."

Loki's eyes flick over to Thor's eye patch and he smirks at the word play. "As much fun as you might have watching me sleep, you'll need your wits about you tomorrow."

Thor shrugs. "I'll be awake for a while anyway. I've collected a list of concerns that need addressing and before I turn in I'll need to review them."

"A list of concerns?"

"Things our people want me to address. Questions, you know."

"You haven't asked for my feedback."

Thor rolls onto his side and props his head up with his right hand. "I'm all ears."

Loki closes his eyes lifts his eyebrows. "I think I should be king."

Thor punches his arm and laughs, pleased to see a satisfied smirk on Loki's face.

"Take a bath and we can talk about it."

At this, Loki sits up and sighs. "Are there towels or do you intend for me to drip dry?"

"Towels _and_ sheets."

Loki turns to look at him and raises an eyebrow. "There's no bed, Thor."

"Not yet, but a blanket will be nice after going weeks without one."

"Am I meant to share one with you?" Loki asks after a moment.

Thor nods. "But you'll have it to yourself while I'm working."

Loki says nothing as he rises to his feet and exits the room. Thor hears the bathroom door close and then the sound of running water.

He lingers on the floor for a moment and takes deep breaths.

There's a lot to do tonight, the list of concerns he collected is long - though there are repeats, and Thor needs to be prepared. Thankfully, Heimdall will assist him, and before the assembly tomorrow Thor is meeting with his council from the ship.

With a heavy sigh, Thor heaves himself up and grabs his notebook.

Before he goes upstairs to meet with Heimdall, Thor leaves their blankets in the center of the bedroom with a piece of paper he tore out of his notebook on top.

_Sleep well_, it reads.

oooooo

A/N: I want this to resemble what the MCU has established, but this is canon divergent so not all things will match what we saw in Endgame. Also! I made a dedicated twitter account for thorki. So if you'd like to cry about the brothers with me, you can find me under the name: the_jammys. Thanks for bearing with me while we establish the world building, and thank you for reading!


	4. Panic

oooooo

It's well into the early hours of the morning when Thor returns.

Korg and Meek haven't moved from the living room, and Thor is grateful that at least someone is managing to find rest.

He is beyond exhausted. Having spent the previous night habitually checking for his brother, followed by an incredibly busy day that ended in him and Heimdall extensively pouring over every concern his people had - Thor feels desperate to be unconscious.

There are a few hours yet before everyone is meant to gather, which should give Thor just enough time to bathe and give his body a break. Even just lying down and closing his eye is welcome at this point, as Thor is fairly certain that he won't find sleep with his brain running as fast as it is.

The past few days seem to have occured in fast forward. Really, the last few weeks have been a blur. Thor's brain is running on fumes. With little food, little sleep, and a thrust into leadership all while burying his grief and fighting the urge to kiss his brother, it's a lot to process.

Thor wants to serve his people well, to be a strong king. He wants to assuage their fears and bring them the same sense of comfort and security they knew in Asgard.

But his own fears are mounting.

He prays that it's just a lack of sleep and that he will feel less on edge once he's able to rest on a bed and get a solid eight hours in. With any luck, that will be this evening.

In the meantime, dinner and a bath are likely to help. Food fuels, and hot water soothes.

Thank goodness there is something ready to grab and eat so Thor doesn't have to delay by preparing a meal. He snags an apple and sits down on the floor of the kitchen, hoping the cabinets in front of him that hide him from the living room will dull the sound of his chewing and allow his roommates to continue sleeping peacefully.

At the first bite, Thor nearly moans.

There was no fruit on the Statesman, everything was packaged, processed rations: stale and leaden. This - this was fresh, bright, crisp. Were Thor not already so wound up it would have shocked him into being awake. It serves as a reminder of what his people have gone without, and of what he cost them on Asgard.

Would they take to Earth's fruit? Had his people sat in their homes, bitten into the same thing and also remembered Indunn's apples? Had they cursed Thor for destroying them? For not defeating Hela and protecting them as he should have?

He devours it as the thoughts consume him, and then blindly reaches up to the counter behind him to grab another when he's finished.

Had anyone gone to bed hungry tonight? Was there enough food? People were surely ravenous after their space diets and would need extra nourishment for a while to regain the weight they lost.

What if someone got ill from the food? Thor sent them off to their new homes without gathering a healer's consent to be on call. He is trying his best, what he believes is his best, and he is still coming up short.

There are tears in Thor's eyes, and he wishes there was a blanket over him so that he might properly hide. He needs something - a hug, a smile, some kind of reassurance - but he can't have those things. He's the king, he needs to be strong. To own his decisions. To be confident and wise.

The fruit is comforting, at least, and with nothing but that to ease his fretting Thor finds himself clearing nearly every piece they have. When he spies the pile of peels, cores, and stems left behind and realizes what he's doing, he stops and pulls himself up to standing.

He can't eat all the food. Korg, Meek, and Loki need it too.

_Loki_.

Thor hopes his brother is asleep. He wants to check, but the bedroom door is shut and he doesn't want to open it more than once and risk waking Loki.

Bath first.

Thor disposes of the compostables, and then as quietly as he can, slips into the bathroom and shuts the door behind him. When he flips on the light and looks in the mirror, he nearly jumps at the sight.

_Oof_.

Greasy hair was unavoidable, and Thor was hardly the only one sporting it during his time on the Statesman, but the harsh yellow light from the bathroom makes it look even worse. He has bags under his eyes that rival those of his brother's, and his skin looks dull. Weeks without sunlight and proper nutrition had taken their toll on his appearance.

Thor brings his hands up to his cheeks and rubs them a bit, trying to bring some color back. He moves his jaw around, stretching the skin, and opens his eyes as wide as he can. He still looks deflated.

He thinks of a smooth pink cream his mother used to wear to keep her cheeks soft during dryer months. It smelled like roses, and as a child Thor found that absolutely enchanting. He would stand beside her vanity and watch while she applied it to her own face, and then climb onto her lap to request the same treatment.

If he closes his eyes, he can still imagine the feel of her delicate fingers massaging it into his skin.

Thor mimics the motion on his skin and feels tears prickling the corner of his eye.

He would never feel her do that again.

If there was anyone in the world Thor loved as much as his brother, it was his mother. He had been hopelessly spoiled by the Norns in being her son, for there is, or was, no sweeter being.

He wonders what wisdom she would have for him now, and if she would be disappointed in him for resurrecting Surtur, if she thought he was ready to be king, or if he was doing enough to take care of Loki.

Thor huffs a soft laugh as he pictures what his mother would say if she learned that Loki had faked his death and let Thor mourn him again. Surely she would lay her youngest over her knee and spank him.

Perhaps Thor will do it for her.

He dries his eyes and slowly removes his clothes.

Like everyone else, Thor has only worn one set of clothes since Asgard's destruction. The only alternative on the Statesman was a medical gown that didn't completely close in the back.

It feels good to be naked, to move freely out of the leathers. It's disappointing that he will have to put them back on, but fresh clothes will be delivered soon.

Thor sits on the edge of the tub while he fiddles with the knobs to start the water running. He hopes the sound won't disturb Korg or Meek, and then remembers that he was able to hear this sound from the bedroom earlier and hopes Loki stays asleep.

As the tub slowly fills, Thor runs his fingers through the water and breathes deeply.

There is so much to do.

He mentally checks over the list again and again, feeling infinitely grateful that Heimdall helped him with it.

After the meeting tomorrow, Thor has to contact Bruce and let him know they're alright. He hopes that Heimdall was successful in sending him to the rest of the Avengers and that he will be able to reach all of them with a single phone call.

As he slowly lowers himself into the tub after turning the tap off, Thor sends out a silent prayer of thanks for the glory of water.

The soaps Loki used earlier are sitting on the rim of the tub. Thor grabs one and begins to lather himself.

He imagines that he's washing away his pain with the sweat and dirt. The grime on his arms may as well be the sins he feels he's committed for how voraciously he scrubs at them.

When he gets to his cock, Thor's hand pauses and he hesitates.

It's been ages since he's found release, and it would certainly help him unwind. It may also make it easier to be beside Loki if he doesn't enter the room extra pent up.

He tentatively wraps a hand around the soft flesh between his legs and gently tugs it.

There's no lust to it, just practicality. He's done this purely to aid him in sleeping more times than he can count.

Thor rests his head back on the edge of the tub, slips his eye shut and takes a deep breath.

_Just relax_, he tells himself as the water sloshes around his hand.

He goes slowly, not wanting the splashes to grow too noisy, and lets his knees fall wide.

The water is nice and warm, and the floral scent of the soap is pleasing. Thor tries to focus on that, on the physical, instead of letting his mind wander and chasing the nasty little trains of thought that continue to creep in.

_The day is done. It's time to rest_.

After a few minutes of this, Thor's hand stills.

Maybe it's the distracting sound of the water, or Meek and Korg being so close, or perhaps the physical exhaustion from not sleeping - but his body is unresponsive.

He decides not to fight it, and writes off the little voice telling him that he doesn't deserve an orgasm as one born out of fatigue.

With his newly freed hand, Thor finishes washing his body, moves onto his hair and face, and then relaxes into the sudsy water.

It feels good to be clean, and he intended to linger and let his muscles relax, but now that the water around him is murky from soap and his own muck Thor decides to get out and go listen to Loki breathe.

As the water dribbles down the drain, Thor towels off. He picks up his clothes and decides not to try tugging leather on over damp skin, a fruitless endeavor. It's warm enough that he can go lie down under a blanket and give himself time to dry off completely.

Thor shuts off the light and exits the bathroom. Before heading to the bedroom he peeks into the living room to make sure he hasn't woken anyone up.

Rumbling snores greet him and Thor lets out a relieved sigh.

When he steps back to the bedroom he gently turns the knob and slowly pushes the door open, trying to make as little noise as possible.

Loki is lying on the floor in the same position as earlier, with his arms cradling his head. There's a sheet over him, wrapped tightly around his body, and his clothes are piled at his feet next to the shoes Thor took off earlier.

Thor feels blood rush into his face as this likely means his brother is also nude. His arms are bare, and Thor can't remember the last time he saw this much of Loki's skin. The dark suddenly seemed tragic and wasteful.

Thor's admiration for the usually hidden limbs nearly stirs his formerly uninterested flesh and he quickly calls to mind unsexy things, like crippling guilt, so that he doesn't pop a tent in his towel.

There are no curtains yet, so the moon has bathed the room in soft light, and he can see that Loki's eyes are open.

"Did my bath wake you up?" Thor whispers as he lays down beside his brother.

Loki shakes his head and shifts. "It's difficult to sleep on the floor."

It's always been like this for Loki. His body knows he's a prince and expects to be treated as such. On hunts, it didn't matter how many furs Thor brought to lay down for their bedding - Loki always struggled to get comfortable. No amount of exertion, drink, or magic seemed to assuage it.

There was usually only one way Loki would find slumber.

The words are almost out of Thor's mouth when he shuts it.

Offering Loki his arm to hold might lead to another fight, and if that happens his already weak resolve is going to crumble. He doesn't want to cry again tonight.

"Furniture should arrive later today," he says instead as he put his arms behind his head to mirror his brother.

"Did you sort out your list?" Loki asks quietly.

Thor nods. "It was tedious, but I am prepared to address every concern."

After a moment of quiet he hears Loki inhale sharply. "Are any of them about me?"

There is no sense in lying, as it is going to come up tomorrow anyway.

"A few," Thor answers.

When it was just him and his people, it was easier to put himself in their shoes and recognize Loki's crimes for what they were. But when he is lying beside his brother, and he looks so tiny and unguarded under a thin sheet, Thor feels his heart clench.

_Why can't they see what I see?_

"Do they want you to send me away?"

"There are some who asked if you are headed back to a cell. But none explicitly wished for it," Thor answers, carefully.

And this is mostly true.

"Would you do it if they had?"

Thor sighs. Loki and his need for constant reassurance. They've already had this discussion.

"No, Loki. I would not," he answers with all the patience of a god.

"You're prepared to defy your people on my behalf?"

"They are our people, Loki. I hope that those who find themselves mistrusting you will come to appreciate your value given time."

Loki snorts beside him. "Mistrust born over more than a thousand years isn't likely to dissipate just because you will it."

"Maybe not, but I'm going to try."

They're quiet for a minute, and Thor finds that his brother is correct - this is decidedly _not_ comfortable. But it is at least better than it was on the Statesman, it's darker and it's just the two of them.

He can hear Loki breathe.

He will do anything he can to keep Loki close. His duty is to his people, and he will go down swinging for them, but privately - he needs Loki near. Anything that will keep him safe, alive, and in the same room is worth it.

Thor is prepared to fight for his brother; to help him remember the good inside, and to see his dream of fighting together side by side.

The urge to reach out and grab Loki and pull him close is nearly overwhelming, particularly since Thor would dearly love some modicum of comfort right now, but he keeps his arms behind his head. His only indulgence is turning to look at Loki.

His brother is a lovely thing.

Loki's bath restored his hair to it's natural penchant for curls, and Thor can just make out the soft waves in the moonlight. He has to enjoy them now, while they're tucked in the privacy of their room. One offhand comment from their father in childhood, and Loki has been embarrassed by them ever since. Thor knows this as Loki once confessed it after having too much ale, but Thor cannot recall the specific occasion of this story. It bothers him, that any version of himself didn't immediately commit every detail of his time with Loki to memory. He is glad to remember the details of the story, though, and to see the curls return.

Thor was surprised to see them creeping back on Sakaar, though the length of his brother's locks weighed them down a bit and prevented some of the bounce Thor was used to when Loki's hair was shorter. Perhaps Loki had too much else on his mind to be bothered with slicking them away, concerned though he was about staying in the Grandmaster's good graces. How, exactly, his brother accomplished that Thor doesn't care to dwell on.

His brother has always been crafty, clever, and possessed strong survival instincts. When disaster strikes, he always manages to carve out a tiny hole to eek through so that he might live to see another day.

Thor is certain no one else would have survived a suicide attempt from a fall into space.

Either the Norns were on Loki's side and had bigger plans for him, or his brother was doomed to live out his days regardless of when he intended to be done with them.

For the sake of his brother's joy, Thor certainly hopes it is the former.

His heart clenches inside his chest and Thor arms twitch with the urge to pull his brother on top of him like a baby otter.

How had he managed to survive all those days on the Statesman in his brother's company without itching like this? He certainly wanted these things, but not with the same ache he currently feels. This is more than the fear of flight risk his brother imposed, this is longing he doesn't have a name for.

But acting on these wishes will drive Loki away.

So, likely, will asking Loki to share the sheet he had wrapped around him, and so Thor keeps his mouth shut.

For tonight, anyway.

Thor gazes at his brother for hours as the room gets brighter and the moon leaves them.

When he can no longer reasonably ignore that night has turned into morning, Thor sighs and sits up.

"I'm meeting with the council before our assembly," he says quietly.

Loki purses his lips. "Am I correct in assuming that I'm not invited?"

Thor grimaces. "I'm afraid the first meeting is exclusively for the council, but if you'd like to walk with me to meet them I'd be glad for the company."

There's a soft 'tsk' and Loki sits up beside him. "And what? Wait outside for you like a dog?"

The fraternal urge to jest about 'leaving him a bowl of water' is unwise, so Thor saves it for another time and takes a deep breath.

"It may feel nice to get some rest in the sunshine," he replies, withholding any commentary about how Loki's pallor is approaching an alarming shade and vitamin D may soon become medically necessary.

Loki closes his eyes and sighs. "Fine."

Thor hides his grin by rising and tugging on his clothes, keeping his back turned to his brother to grant him privacy while he does the same.

"Do you want to grab some fruit?" Thor whispers as they exit the bedroom, moving stiffly from their night on the floor.

Loki shakes his head as he finger combs his curls. "Not now."

Korg and Meek are still snoring away when the brothers walk through the front door.

Heimdall is waiting out front.

"Morning," he greets, and it occurs to Thor that he has no idea if Heimdall sleeps. He certainly doesn't look as terrible as either himself or Loki.

Heimdall nods to him and then to Loki, who is wincing at the sunlight and doesn't notice or isn't a polite enough morning-person to return the gesture.

The three set off for the designated meeting place, walking in silence as they take in the sounds of the world waking up.

It's early enough that the sunshine is filtered through clouds and a dense fog closer to the water, but the delightful sound of birds chirping their good mornings to each other is a welcome one. Even the moisture in the air that might have been vexing on Asgard makes Thor smile as it suggests that Loki's hair will grow even wilder.

It's never agreed with humidity, and from the corner of his eye Thor can see Loki's fussing with it growing more agitated.

Most of the council is already assembled by the time Thor's party reaches the town hall.

Their idle chatter ceases the moment they realize who's walking with Thor.

"What is _he_ doing here?" asks Nivdr, one of the men who had previously sat on Odin's council. If the way he spat the question out isn't proof enough of his contempt, the sneer that follows certainly is.

Whether or not it's justified, it wounds Thor, and he is so tired already that his stomach churns at the thought of coming to odds with these men and women he has come to rely on. Thor takes a deep breath and puts a hand on his brother's shoulder, half holding him back. "Loki is just escorting me. He will wait outside while we speak."

"See to it that he does. We've no place for him," Nivdr practically spits.

How someone can muster that much vitriol so early in the day is a mystery to Thor, but he keeps his expression neutral, and offers an apologetic squeeze to Loki.

It's not enough.

"You must be forgetting that it was I you spent years speaking with," Loki says coldly, stepping forward to dislodge Thor's hand.

Nivdr is unamused and quick. "You're a liar and a snake. Your father never trusted you, taking you in was his greatest mistake - and we'll not repeat it."

The other members of the council appear just as alarmed as Thor feels. Loki is, after all, still their prince, and Thor has vouched for him.

"That's enough, Nivdr," Thor says sharply as his hand returns to Loki's shoulder. "I will not have you speak that way to my brother."

Nivdr turns his nose up and says nothing.

"Perhaps we should get inside to begin our meeting," Heimdall says as he nods towards the doors to the hall.

There's a smattering of affirmative mutters as the small group heads inside.

Thor lingers behind until the doors have shut.

Loki is rigid beneath his hand, and Thor can see from his profile that his brother is lost in his own thoughts.

"Loki?"

"What."

Thor squeezes him again. "I wouldn't take his words to heart, brother."

Loki is silent, breathing heavily through his nostrils, and Thor isn't sure if Loki is going to fall into hysterics.

He opens his mouth to offer more comfort and Loki interrupts him. "Go to your meeting, Thor."

It's not ideal to leave Loki like this. He hates the idea of Loki sitting out here stewing in misery and self-deprecation.

"Shall I challenge Nivdr to a sparring match and avenge your honor?" Thor asks, only half joking.

Loki turns to look at him, annoyed, but Thor can see the corner of his mouth twitch. "You never let me fight my own battles, do you?"

"The truth is that I'm long out of practice, and your dignity is merely providing me with a perfect excuse to exercise my form."

"You're a buffoon," Loki says, but there's no fire behind it.

"Will you be alright?"

"Go to your meeting, Thor."

Thor stops Loki from walking away by loosing the grip he had on Loki's shoulder and reaching out to tug on his wrist instead. He pulls Loki to face him and very seriously considers ripping out Nivdr's heart when he sees his brother's expression.

"Will you be here when I'm done?" he asks, wishing to inch his hand lower to lace his fingers with Loki's.

Loki's eyes are fixed on where Thor is holding him. Thor can feel Loki's pulse thumping at him from beneath his fingers. He can hear Loki trying to steady his breathing through his nose. Thor gives him an encouraging squeeze, and Loki nods. Thor waits a moment, to see if Loki will say anything, but when no words are forthcoming Thor wonders if his brother is keeping his mouth shut to avoid revealing the depth of his hurt.

"I will be quick," Thor promises, and though he aches to do it, he turns to leave Loki and enter the hall.

oooooo

True to his word, Thor hurries through their discussion, bringing everyone up to speed on what he and Heimdall had discussed and gaining their inputs where necessary.

Right now, the main goal is to find a way to sustain everyone. With basic necessities for laying a foundation out of the way, future income and sustenance are a concern.

Thor had taken stock of everyone's skills and trades, and the local authorities had agreed to assist with finding employment for the people. Some jobs are easier than others to place, as the skills translated well between realms. Farmers, craftsmen, teachers, cooks, maids, guards - their transition would be easy. Not everything had to be sorted today, and Thor knows it will be an uphill battle, but it is good to get things started.

Outside the hall, the citizens have gathered into a sleepy crowd, waiting patiently to enter. Two council members hold the doors open with their backs as they welcome the people inside and direct them to sit.

Thor slips through them to retrieve his brother and make sure Loki hasn't run off after Nivdr's comments.

True to his word, though, Loki is outside leaning back against a tree.

Loki's arms are folded across his chest, and the sunlight makes the exhaustion under his eyes look like bruises. Once again, Thor is grateful a bed is coming today and he can build a proper nest for Loki to sleep in.

"Thank you for waiting," Thor says as he joins Loki at his side while the people continue to file into the hall.

"I told you I would," Loki answers, shifting a bit as his arms fold in tighter.

"This won't take long, and then we can go back home."

His brother nods once and says nothing.

Loki still looks upset, and there isn't time to address it now as the last person has just entered the hall and now everyone is waiting for Thor.

Fucking Nivdr.

The brothers head into the tiny space, closing the doors behind them.

Loki takes a spot against the back wall, keeping his arms folded. Thor wishes he could sit beside Loki and take over fussing with his curls while someone else handles the meeting.

He nods to people as he walks up the aisle to the front of the room, murmuring 'good morning' and trying to appear awake and confident. Once he reaches his post and surveys the room, Thor feels like he's been slapped in the face.

It's not the first time Thor has addressed everyone, but it feels like he's only just seeing how few their numbers are.

And suddenly it's hard to breathe.

He opens his mouth, but air seems to escape him, flowing around him and avoiding his lips completely. The absence of it makes his heart pick up a frantic tempo, convinced that it's never going to beat again. The instinctive ability to form thoughts and control his body have abandoned him, and as the faces before Thor turn from expectant to confused and concerned, it feels as though the walls are closing in.

Whether it's the lack of sleep, proper nutrition, or trauma finally taking its greasy hold and wringing the final twist, Thor feels certain this is the end for him. His unfocused gaze sweeps over the crowd, and the moment his eyes fall onto his brother, Thor's knees nearly collapse. This is too much, he's going to die here and leave Loki without making arrangements for his protection -

Loki is frowning at him, which isn't an unusual occurrence, and his curls sway a bit as he steps forward and away from the wall.

Thor watches his brother's arms uncross and Loki's fingertips do a small purposeful wave as a tickle of green he knows to be Loki's magic dances between them.

As quickly as the panic had set in, a sudden wave of calm flushes over Thor and he finds himself gulping air that had previously evaded him.

A warm glide, akin to the feeling of stepping under the spray of a hot shower, beginning at Thor's crown and slowly flowing down to his toes brings warmth and a sense of grounding back to him. The galloping pace of his heart returns to a calm, steady drum, and as Thor flexes his fingers and breathes his thoughts return.

_Thank you, Loki_.

Thor can't say this openly, now, and hopes that however apparent his panic was that no one is discomfited by it.

He begins by greeting everyone, and promising to make this brief so they can return to their homes and continue to rest, and hastens through the agenda. The preparations were thorough enough, and so much is still pending, that the questions are few and answered succinctly. When it comes to the matter of Loki, Thor quickly says that he and his brother are committed to serving their people, and should someone have need of them they are living together and easy to find.

No one objects, or turns around to give Loki a look, and Thor is able to move straight through the rest of his notes.

Whether his people are too exhausted to engage in lively discussion or even properly process what their king is telling them, or they trust Thor enough to handle things is unclear, but the meeting ends before the morning fog has even dissolved over the grassy banks.

With the promise of a visit and deliveries for their homes, the people slowly head back to their new dwellings. No one has come up to Thor to inquire about the shaky start to his address, or given him a suspicious look, and Thor is grateful for it.

When none but Loki and Heimdall remain, Thor closes the doors to the hall and nods in the direction of their home.

He wants to thank Loki for whatever spell his brother had cast to help calm him, and is certain Heimdall noticed his discomfort so there's no sense in being embarrassed over admitting to it now, but before Thor can form a proper message of gratitude, Heimdall places a hand on his shoulder.

"It would be in everyone's best interest if you got some sleep," he says kindly, but firmly.

The gatekeeper is perhaps the last authority figure left in Thor's life that the childhood version of himself still recognizes and responds to. Anyone else would likely hesitate to advise their king to sleep, but Heimdall's guiding hand is unwavering and his words are sound.

"I will," Thor promises. "Once I contact Bruce and the deliveries are sorted -"

Heimdall squeezes his shoulder as they walk. "It will be hours before anything is delivered, and you'll need your strength to assist with the lifting. We are hours ahead of your friend on the other end of the world. He is likely sleeping, and you should do the same."

Beyond the matter that Heimdall is correct on each point, and that Thor is so tired it's becoming increasingly difficult to stay upright, he's grateful to have an adult take the reins of authority and tell him what to do. Years ago this might have wounded his pride, but things are different now.

"I yield to your wisdom," Thor says with a grateful smile.

With a final clap on his shoulder, Heimdall removes his hand.

Loki stays silent, fingers back to toying with his hair.

"I will wake you when I see the trucks coming," Heimdall says when they reach home.

"Thank you, Heimdall," Thor answers with a nod.

As Heimdall ascends the stairs, Thor turns to his brother and grins. "I'm going to give the grass a try, would you care to join me?"

Loki releases his hair and frowns. "You're going to what?"

Thor stretches his arms out in front of him and then over his head, wincing a bit at how much popping his joints release. "Grass sounds far more pleasant than lying down on the bedroom floor again, and I could also do with some sun."

The clouds are still shaking off their own sleep, so it's not oppressively hot, and getting his skin on some green is exactly what Thor had hoped to do.

"I suppose that's more pleasant than sitting in an empty room doing nothing," Loki concedes, though he looks huffy about it.

"Come on," Thor says as he walks Loki around to the back of the house. There's no fence to make it a proper yard, but it does grant privacy that the front does not.

The grass and soil look pleasantly soft, and Thor sends a prayer of thanks that nature has made such a lovely bed. The yard slopes out and then down to a cliff edge overlooking the sea, but far enough from the house that the slap of waves on land is unlikely to keep them awake. It's a blanket of green peppered with small yellow and white flowers.

_Perhaps we'll plant a garden_.

"I'm eager to wear fresh clothes," Thor says as he sits down and begins removing his shoes.

Loki stays standing, a few yards from him. "I am also eager for you to wear fresh clothes."

Thor laughs, and the unexpected joy it gives him - the lift in his stomach and shoulders - the stretch of his smile, endears him to his brother.

Divested of his boots, Thor rolls his ankles and flexes his toes, planting his feet in the grass and relishing the feel. He hastens to remove his top, and once it's over his head and off he spies Loki looking at him with a furrow in his brow.

"What are you doing?"

Thor continues his task, shimmying out of his pants and tossing them onto the small pile of discarded wears beside him.

"I told you, I need sunshine," Thor answers as he lies down and stretches his arms behind his head to form a pillow. His smallclothes remain, more for the benefit of anyone who should come calling after him than for Loki. His brother has seen him naked thousands of times, but an unsuspecting citizen need not have anymore fright or discomfort.

Loki is silent, and turns away from Thor to look out at the lawn.

It feels wonderful to be free of the stiff garments, and if Thor had more energy he might roll around in the grass the way he used to as a child at play. Thor slips his eyes shut and lets out a happy sigh as he settles in, stretching and wiggling until his muscles unclench.

The soft tap of shoes walking on grass greets Thor's right ear, and then the sound of Loki sitting beside him makes Thor turn his head.

He doesn't expect Loki to strip, as his brother would probably rather be electrocuted again than allow someone to see his skin. Loki crosses his legs and absentmindedly toys with the grass before him.

"Thank you," Thor says quietly.

Loki doesn't look at him. "For what?"

"Earlier, your magic. Thank you," Thor says again. He sees Loki frown, but his brother continues to keep his gaze on the little blades between his fingers.

The brother's are quiet, listening to the roar of the ocean below and their even breathing. As soon as Thor has closed his eye once more, he hears Loki inhale.

"What happened?"

Thor keeps his eye shut, and wonders if Loki is looking at him.

"I don't know," he answers, truthfully. "It suddenly became difficult to breathe, and I felt panicked."

"You were afraid?" Loki asks, and there's a softness to his voice Thor can't recall the last time he heard.

Thor takes in a deep breath through his nose.

"I couldn't name what gave me that fright, but yes I was afraid. Thought I might die," Thor adds, rushing through the last few words. He wouldn't admit that to anyone else.

When Loki doesn't answer, Thor sneaks a peak at him and finds his brother's face aimed at him.

"Have you felt like that before?" Loki asks, and there's no malice to it - no bite, but the wrinkle of his brow makes him look so much older than Thor knows him to be.

Thor doesn't answer immediately, as his tired mind flips through the centuries of his life and tries to recall if panic has ever gripped him quite like that before.

"I don't think so," he finally says, looking at Loki and wishing he could see exactly what his brother was thinking.

Loki's eyes soften briefly before he turns away again. "You should sleep, Thor."

"Are you going to?"

"Perhaps."

And Thor knows that's as much as he can hope for right now. He shifts his bottom to nestle in again and takes another deep breath.

He can feel it when the clouds slide away and the delicious warmth of the sun is fully on him, making him feel like bread in an oven: something joyful and nourishing.

"You were right," Thor says quietly through a smile.

"I'm always right," Loki answers, and Thor can hear amusement. Thor would nudge him if he weren't so comfortable. "What in particular are you recognizing?"

Thor aims his grin at the sky. "The sun is shining on us."

Loki says nothing, but Thor hears him shift to lie down, and when Thor steals a glance at him, Loki is smiling.

oooooo


	5. It was the beans, Thor

oooooo

"Thor, they're here."

Thor opens his eyes with a jolt, shocked at how deeply he was asleep. Beside him, Loki turns his head in the direction of their alarm clock and Thor feels a rush of gratitude that his brother remained by his side.

"How long was I asleep?" Thor asks as he rubs his eyes and slaps his cheeks a bit to force himself into alertness.

"Less than two hours," Heimdall answers, staring at the princes with an expression Thor cannot quite place.

Fondness, perhaps the way their mother would have looked at her boys if she happened upon them taking a peaceful nap together.

Heimdall has seen him in all manner of undress, and is not phased in the slightest by how close to nude Thor is.

"Thank you, Heimdall," Thor croaks, coughing to clear his throat of the roughness brought on by sleep. "I'll be right there."

Thor reaches for his clothes and is reminded once again of how excited he is to have something fresh to slip into.

_Soon_, he tells himself as he tugs the stiff garments on.

"Were you able to sleep at all?" he asks Loki, who is still stretched out beside him.

When Loki doesn't immediately answer him, Thor pauses his dressing and looks over at his little brother.

Loki's eyes are closed, and his breathing is even, but he looks tense.

Thor pokes his side in a spot he knows to be ticklish, and grins at the way Loki immediately squirms from the touch and grunts at him.

"Hey, cow, did you get a nap?"

No answer, so Thor gives his brother's flank a squeeze. This would be more effective without the barrier of leather his brother still wore, but Thor is strong enough to make his brother wiggle away from the grip again.

"If you don't stop that I'm going to take your other eye," Loki growls weakly.

"You used to like it when I tickled you," Thor replies, pulling his shirt over his head.

When he faces his brother once more, two green eyes are wide awake and glaring furiously at him.

"I have _never _-"

"Mmhmm," Thor interrupts, standing and stretching. He offers an arm down to help his brother up, which Loki swats away.

"I have to call Bruce and let him know we're alive," Thor says as he heads for the front of the house, grimacing a bit at how stiff his clothes and boots are.

"And just how do you plan to contact him?" Loki asks as he picks grass out of his curls and flicks them back onto the ground.

Between the untamed volume of Loki's locks and the familiarity of having grass in it, as he might have during a game in their youth, Thor feels a rush of affection for his younger brother. Not for the first time that day, he desires to pull that boy against his chest and give him a squeeze.

But he knows where that will get him, and keeps his hands by his side as he breathes deeply to let the feelings blend out inside him.

"One of the officials I spoke with assured me they could get in contact with Tony Stark, and I am hoping that Bruce is with him," Thor answers as they spy Heimdall standing with neatly dressed men and women.

"Iron Man," Loki says in a mocking tone.

"He once called you a 'diva'," Thor says with an amused grin. "I was impressed that he figured that out after knowing you for such a short time."

Loki scowls and flicks freshly freed grass at him. "What's a 'diva'?"

Thor's laughter draws the attention of the officials, and they wave to him in greeting.

It is beyond any kind of karma or justice that Thor has found himself so lucky in his dealing with these people. They shake his hand and quickly outline the schedule of deliveries expected for the day, working to make a plan so that every home will have necessities by nightfall. Loki stands beside him with his arms folded and stays quiet, but Thor knows his brother dislikes being left out of things and is likely just trying to keep abreast of goings on.

Heimdall helps Thor keep track of where they need to be and at what time. They're committed to assisting with furniture assembly, wanting for the people to continue resting and recovering.

When the only thing left to tend to is the matter of connecting with the Avengers, one of the officials hands Thor a cell phone with a number already typed in. Thor awkwardly holds it to his ear and listens to the electronic chirping until it turns into a voice he recognizes.

"Thor?"

_Thank the Norns_.

"Bruce!" Thor booms, startling everyone around him.

"Oh jeez, oh thank god you're alive. Tony couldn't find any trace of you or the ships and I've been trying to find a way to contact you but there was nothing -"

"I apologize, my friend," Thor interjects, quieter than before. "Much has happened since we last saw each other, and I had to take care of my people before anything else."

"What happened with Thanos?" Bruce asks.

Thor turns to the officials, who are all clearly listening, and gestures that he's going to walk a bit while he talks.

It's not a secret, _per se_, what happened, but Thor isn't eager to let anyone know exactly how powerful his brother is lest the government decide to look any closer into who Thor has in tow with him.

"Loki crafted a stone of his own making that managed to subdue Thanos long enough for us to escape," he answers quietly.

"_Loki_ made a stone? What does that mean - is Thanos dead? Hang on, I'm going to put you on speakerphone so Tony can hear."

Thor has no idea what a speakerphone is.

"I cannot say for certain, but that was Loki's intent."

"How the hell did Loki _make_ an infinity stone?"

"I have yet to hear the mechanics of it, but I can ask him and get back to you."

"Oh, so he's with you? You brought him back to Earth?"

Thor turns around to look at his brother, who is still standing beside Heimdall and watching him.

"He's here now, I have kept an eye on him and -"

"Reindeer games is back on Earth?" Tony interrupts.

"Hello, Tony," Thor says. "I assure you I have kept him within my sight at all times, and Heimdall is here to help me."

They don't answer him.

"The Earth is still under my protection," Thor vows, firmly.

"Bruce said he's less of a dick now," Tony replies, and Thor can hear his smirk.

"That's not the word I used," Bruce says quickly.

"He said Loki helped save everyone on Asgard," Tony continues.

"Thor, do not tell Loki that I called him a dick."

Thor bites the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing.

"He also said that your brother came up with a plan to get everyone away from Thanos when he could have fucked off on his own and only saved himself," Tony presses on.

"Thor, Thor, seriously, can you still hear us? Do _not_ tell Loki that I called him that -"

There's no holding back his laugh now, and Thor feels a huge weight lift knowing that at least these two will not give him grief about keeping Loki by his side.

"Bruce, my friend, I assure you I will keep that to myself. I will, however, inform my brother that you have reported his good behavior, and I am sure he will be grateful," Thor replies.

Tony laughs too, and Thor hears a clap he assumes is Tony smacking Bruce's back.

"So what do you need from us, Zeus?" Tony asks.

Thor turns to look at Loki again and grins at his brother. "For the moment, we are provided for. We have food, home goods are arriving today, and even clothes -"

"Phones? Computers? Jobs? Got all that too?"

_Oh._

"There's no one to call except you, and we do not have computers on Asgard -"

"You need computers on Earth, Thor," Tony interrupts again. "Plenty of jobs can be done from home, and I'll make some calls to arrange others. I'll swing by tomorrow with the tech, get the lay of the land and see what else I can do."

Thor is nearly speechless. It's too much, and he wants to protest, but for the sake of his people, he takes a deep breath and says as evenly as he can, "Thank you, Tony."

"No sense in having money and connections if they don't go to good use. Send us your location, okay? I'm gonna get started on that, Thor, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Tony, thank you again."

"Hasta manaña, thunder man!"

"Thor? Hey, I'm still here," Bruce says. "I'll go with Tony, and Natasha is here too, she might join."

"It would be lovely to see her again," Thor replies, feeling calmer by the minute at the promise of so much assistance and the stability it will bring to his people.

"I'll tell her you say so. I'm glad you're alive - all of you."

Thor smiles and wishes he could do more than say 'thank you'. "Likewise, my friend."

"Tony is gesturing for me to come help him. Send us your location and get some sleep," Bruce says.

"If the doctor demands it."

"He does. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

They say their goodbyes and Thor removes the phone from his ear, unsure of how to turn it off. He settles for leaving it alone and walks back to return it.

"Is Bruce safe?" Heimdall asks.

"He is, yes. He's with Tony, and they are coming here tomorrow with phones and computers," Thor answers.

Loki looks up with wide eyes.

"I need to send our location to Tony Stark," Thor says to the woman whose phone he had used.

She nods and types into the device. "I'll do that now."

"Thank you."

The officials take their leave, and the three gods walk back to their new home.

"They're coming here?" Loki asks in a way that Thor recognizes as discomfited.

The urge to put a comforting hand on his brother is so strong and instinctive that Thor can't stop himself from reaching out and grasping Loki's shoulder as they walk.

"They are aware you are here and that I intend to keep it that way."

Loki doesn't look reassured, and stops walking to let Heimdall get ahead of them.

The gatekeeper is familiar enough with the princes to know that he is meant to continue on.

"They may not listen to you," Loki says quietly, keeping his eyes downcast.

Thor slides his hand from Loki's shoulder to his neck, noting that he has touched his brother like this more in the last few days than in the entirety of the past few years. "Bruce has vouched for you, and Tony said nothing of wanting to send you away."

Loki rolls his eyes and looks at his brother like he's simple. "Just because they've neglected to inform you of their plans doesn't mean they don't have them."

The paranoia is fair, as punishment from the Avengers is likely what he deserves. But Tony was also complicit in war crimes, and Thor knows that if any group of people should be willing to give someone a 'second chance' to do the right thing, it's the Avengers.

Thor gives his brother's ear lobe a small tug and waits until Loki looks him in the eye.

"Remember what I said, okay?"

Loki stares back, and if Thor didn't know precisely how tired his brother was and empathize with him on a visceral level he would have smacked Loki and demanded that his brother trust him.

"Let's put some breakfast in your belly," Thor says instead, tugging lightly on Loki's shoulder to guide him toward the house. "You'll feel better once you eat."

oooooo

The furniture took hours to assemble and sort, and Thor quickly discovered he could not possibly do it all himself - even with Heimdall's aid. Though he felt guilty for it, everyone was glad to take responsibility for their own homes if it meant they would be set up that day.

Thor and Heimdall prioritized those who were oldest or most in need of assistance, and it still ate up the sunny hours. Thor briefly considered asking Loki to help them, but he wasn't sure how everyone felt about his brother and didn't want to cause undue stress by inviting Loki into another's home.

Upon returning to his own dwelling, however, Thor discovered Loki had constructed their bed and fitted the mattress with sheets. The pillows and extra blanket that came today make it look downright pornographic in how badly Thor's body aches to be inside it.

"This looks great, Loki!" Thor says brightly as he takes stock of their room.

The bed is large enough for two, described as a 'full', but it's certainly smaller than what the princes knew on Asgard. Thor is thrilled at the promise of proximity, and tries not to let his excitement show too plainly.

Besides the bed, the only other piece in the room is a plain six drawer dresser that the brothers will have to share. It's no problem now, as they have hardly anything to put inside it, but Thor suspects that with his brother's love of fine clothing they will have to save for another in time.

It's hardly personal yet, but it's only their second day. Loki, ever the prince, will likely make the room lavish and beautiful once he has the means to afford it.

Thor grins at the idea of Loki turning their shared space into a soft little nest with plush rugs and declarative wall hangings, and turns his smile to his brother.

Loki is sitting on the right side of the bed with his shoes off and his legs crossed. He appears to be aimlessly tracing his finger onto the blankets, but Thor recognizes the patterns as runes and wonders what protections his brother is placing on their bed.

Thor selected a dark green blanket for them, and hopes it's attractive enough for Loki's tastes as the choices were limited. It is early June, and they don't need to bury themselves in extra covers yet. By the time the air turns cold and nips into their bedroom, Thor is certain Loki will have something pretty to keep them warm.

"This mattress is terrible," Loki says, looking at Thor expectantly.

The grin on Thor's face remains as he crosses to the bed and presses down on it to see what Loki is talking about.

"After we get jobs we can save for a new one, but not before you give it a proper chance. It's bound to be more comfortable than the floor," Thor replies.

Loki narrows his eyes, halting his rune tracing. "After we _what_?"

"Get jobs," Thor repeats, bouncing a bit as he continues to push against the mattress.

It feels fine to him.

"I have a job."

Thor has prepared for this conversation and knows his brother won't yield easily to the idea of committing himself to forty hours a week of something he may hate.

"How much money do you make?" Thor asks, still grinning.

This annoys Loki. "I can conjure coin."

"I thought you already gave me all the valuables you had on you."

Loki purses his lips and looks down at the bed.

"I'm a prince, Thor," he says as his finger glides around in a complicated pattern.

"A prince should serve his people, Loki."

Loki turns and narrows his eyes at him once more. "And how do you imagine I do that, brother? What _job_ do you have in mind for me?"

Thor finally stops playing with the mattress and stands up tall to stretch. "I'm not sure what connections Stark has in this area, but we should be grateful for anything."

The rune tracing stops. "Where do you imagine I can go that will take me? Any establishment I set foot in will likely rally to take me out."

"He mentioned that computers enable people to work from home, perhaps we will be able to arrange that for you," Thor replies as he lies down on the floor to continue stretching.

A rug really will make a difference here.

He hears Loki shift on the bed and watches his brother's face appear over the side.

"I'm serious, Thor."

"Why do you so firmly believe that everyone wants to be rid of you?" Thor grunts as he extends his right leg over to his left side and reaches his left arm in the opposite direction.

Loki rolls his eyes and flattens onto his stomach, resting his chin on his folded arms. "Possibly because I've spent years hiding from a murderous titan, and because humans are perhaps the least forgiving and most violent species we have ever encountered."

_Touché._

"Maybe I'll hire you to be my assistant," Thor replies, switching sides and wiggling his eyebrows at his brother.

He is rewarded with a pillow thrown at his face.

Thor laughs as he places it behind his head and beams up at Loki.

"You won't get the job behaving like that," he teases, laughing harder when the second pillow is chucked at him.

"Whatever job you stick me with I expect you to do as well," Loki warns, looking very much like the next thing he throws will not be soft and fluffy.

It's difficult for Thor to stay focused on the discussion at hand when having a pillow thrown at him makes Thor feel like a child again. He's tempted to swat Loki back and fight him with their bedding until they're tuckered out and ready for sleep.

But adult Loki fights with sharp pointy toys, and Thor would be sad to get blood on their new sheets.

"I believe Stark intends for us to work together," he says, grabbing the second pillow and tucking that behind his head as well.

It's pretty bold of Loki to complain about doing work, and Thor very nearly points this out. But his little brother lets out the most put upon sigh and drops his head onto his arms and Thor is filled with so much fondness he won't risk spoiling the moment by commenting on what a brat Loki is.

"Did you see the pajamas I left for you?" Thor asks after indulging in a moment of quiet spent gazing at the dark curls spilling over the edge of the bed.

"They're too big," Loki mumbles without lifting his head.

Thor nudges the edge of the mattress with his knee to jostle Loki. "They're temporary."

More curls slip forward as Loki raises his head enough to narrow his eyes at Thor for shaking the bed.

"Did you eat dinner?"

"Stop asking me that!" Loki snaps, rolling onto his side and then sitting up to continue his invisible writing on the bed.

Thor decides not to press the issue, and to instead make enough for his brother when he prepares his own meal. "What runes are you activating?"

Loki ignores him and continues his task.

"Loki," Thor says again, knocking the bed once more.

His beloved little brother gives him the Asgardian version of 'flipping the bird'. "Quit distracting me."

"Will you be done soon or should I shower first?" Thor asks, unable to hide his amusement at the brother who fancies himself so regal and proper doing something so crass.

Loki huffs, annoyed, and rises from the bed. "I suppose I'll bathe now and finish this when it's your turn."

When Loki strolls to the door, Thor sticks his leg out to block his brother's path.

"I'm going to make dinner while you're in there and leave you a plate," he says.

Ever the grateful and delightful individual, Loki purposefully steps on Thor's leg and continues over his brother.

"Stop trying to feed me."

Thor waits until he hears the bathroom door shut and then stands and places the pillows back on the bed. He spends an extra minute fluffing the pillow on Loki's side, fussing until it looks as delightfully inviting as it had when Thor came home.

He will wait to change into his sleep clothes until after he's showered, not wanting any of the sweat and dirt transferring from his dirty clothes onto his body to taint his fresh garments.

The door to Korg and Miek's room is closed, and Thor briefly considers knocking and asking if they would like some dinner as well. But if they're asleep, and Thor hopes that everyone is asleep, he doesn't want to interrupt that.

Now that the kitchen is properly stocked, even in its limited capacity, the options for sustenance are greater than they have been in weeks. Thor's culinary skills are not strong, but there are a few dishes he is accustomed to making on hunts. Insert a stove top in place of a roaring fire and packaged meat from a grocery store instead of a fresh kill, and it's basically the same.

The sound of running water in the bath makes Thor smile. He hopes that soaking will relax Loki enough that he can sleep tonight. For his part, Thor is certain he's going to pass out _hard_. If he didn't need to wake up to greet Tony and Bruce tomorrow, Thor could sleep through the day and into the coming week.

He slices an apple to snack on while he cooks meat and opens a can of green beans. Foods packaged in this manner are foreign to Asgardians, and Thor thinks it's incredibly clever of humans to find such an efficient way of preserving produce.

A strange scent greets his nose when Thor removes the lid of the can, and the tiny green stalks look less appetizing than their photograph advertises.

_No matter,_ Thor thinks as he plucks one out and pops it in his mouth. They'll taste better with some heat and some seasoning.

By the time the food is ready and the kitchen smells more like a home and less like a space that's been empty for a decade, Thor wonders if Loki will be done with his bath soon and if he should just wait and eat with his brother. Two plates sit on the counter, packed with grilled chicken, beans sauteed with bacon, and slices of bread. It's a simple meal, but Thor's tongue is taking a bath of its own in his enthusiastic salivation.

Thor walks to the bathroom and presses his ear against the door. He can't hear anything inside and holds his breath to avoid missing anything.

_Risk pissing Loki off by interrupting him, or risk missing a chance to eat with him_.

The desire for connection is strong, and Thor reasons that if he makes Loki mad his brother can always soak it off.

He knocks gently and calls, "Loki?"

There's no answer, so Thor tries again. This time there's an immediate, annoyed, "What?"

Thor opens the door just a crack so his voice will travel better without having to yell, as he is only a few feet from Korg and Miek's door.

"If you're almost finished, the food is ready."

He hears Loki sigh, as though having dinner prepared for him while he luxuriates in a bath is a terrible imposition.

"I'm taking a _bath_, Thor."

Undeterred, Thor says coyly, "I put bacon in the beans."

He doesn't reveal that the beans are green, as Loki and vegetables have a tenuous relationship, but even if Loki picks around the verdant fiber on his plate and only eats the fatty bits of pork Thor will be pleased.

"Fine," Loki answers after a moment. "Go away so I can dry off."

"Okay," Thor says.

"And don't eat my bacon!" Loki calls as the door shuts.

Walking back to the kitchen, Thor nearly vibrates with excitement. There's no extra furniture in their home, so the floor has to function as a table and chairs. Thor pours water and carries the glasses to the area he intends to function as a dining room once the proper pieces are there. By the time he sits down with the plates, silverware, and napkins ready, Loki comes out of the bathroom in his pajamas.

He was absolutely correct: they are too big.

They're simple cotton sweats in a heather gray. Loki is tall enough that nothing drags or hangs, but they're far too large for his tiny waist and hips.

"Why are we eating on the floor?" he asks, taking a seat across from his brother as he questions it.

Thor gestures to the empty space. "Did you want to stand at the counter?"

Loki shoots him a look and picks up his glass of water. "Animals eat off of the ground, Thor," he says before draining his glass. He places it back down and tugs his sleeves further up his forearms to spare them from touching any food.

"This isn't the ground, _Loki_, this is the floor of our home," Thor replies, picking up his plate and spearing some green beans.

"You didn't say they were _green_ beans," Loki says, picking up his fork and using it to spread the beans and spot the bacon.

With his mouth full of food, Thor doesn't say anything, but shrugs and pretends to look innocent.

His brilliant plan works, though, and Loki slowly eats all of his bacon. When he finally stabs a bean, eying Thor as he does so, he pretends to gag at the taste and picks up Thor's water glass to wash it down.

Thor laughs at the full body shudder Loki does and holds out his own plate so his brother can scrape off his remaining beans onto it.

The water from his bath tugs at Loki's curls and weighs them down so they aren't bouncy yet. By morning, his brother's sharp cheekbones will be framed with whipped black waves and give Loki's profile a youthful charm.

Droplets escape from that ebony forest and soak the tops of Loki's shoulders, and Thor wishes he had a robe to offer his brother to keep him dry and cozy.

Thor's gaze slides from the dampening spots spreading down Loki's arms and follows the bend of his elbow, to his bony fingers gripping a fork. He wants to stuff butter into Loki's mouth and pad him with caloric protection against unseen foes.

His pale toes are equally bony, and Thor curses himself for not thinking to purchase socks for his brother.

While Thor is infinitely happy to wander around with nothing between his feet and the ground but air, Loki likes to be covered. Even worse, though it has been many years since Thor shared a bed with his brother, he doubts that Loki's feet are any less icy than he remembers them to be.

The moment he can afford it, Thor vows to purchase his brother the softest, fluffiest slippers he can find.

"How's the chicken?" Thor asks once Loki has cleared half of his.

His brother swallows and a shadow comes over his features. Thor cannot fathom what about that question would make his brother sad, but it's a punch in the gut to bring his brother sorrow.

Thor opens his mouth to try and make it better and can't find the right words.

"It's good," Loki answers quietly.

Neither of them move, and it's quiet enough that Thor is certain Loki can hear his heart hammering.

Loki won't look at him, and when Thor sees a tear roll down his brother's cheek he feels paralyzed. There's so much he wants to do, so many ways he wants to comfort and connect - but Thor's brain is full of frightened white noise. Did the chicken represent something? Had Thor fucked up and said something he shouldn't have, and would acknowledging it make things worse? They were having a nice dinner, Loki was eating, and now Thor had made him cry.

The cold feeling from this morning that made the hair on the back of his neck stand up and his heart palpitate unnaturally creeps back into his bones and makes it difficult to breathe.

_Say something, say something_.

But Thor can barely think clearly enough to keep himself upright and maintain a grip on his plate.

"I'm sorry, Loki," he finally gets out. It feels wrong to say, too lacking and presumptuous, and Thor is horrified when Loki covers his face with his hands and lets out a sob.

_Oh no-_

Thor immediately puts his plate down and reaches a hand out for Loki's knee, but the second he touches his brother Loki jerks and cries harder.

"I'm going to bed," Loki chokes out as he stands, purposefully avoiding eye contact.

He wants to call out to his brother, to hug him or cook him more bacon - something. But with his breathing getting shallower and his heart beating faster Thor feels dizzy, and as soon as the bedroom door shuts he rolls onto his side to keep from fainting.

It's the same feeling from this morning, and Thor closes his eyes and laments that his last act was reducing his brother to tears. He clenches his fists tighter and tighter, and when his nails start to cut into his palms it actually helps him settle.

On an inhale, he clenches as tightly as he can and imagines bursting like an overfilled balloon, and then stretches his hands wide as he exhales. It's hard to breathe too deeply on his side, but repeating this motion helps him calm enough to regain control of his functions.

To keep himself from getting lost in a mental shit storm again, Thor tries to direct himself to action based tasks. He sits up, grabs their plates and tries to focus on his steps as he carries them to the kitchen.

_Now grab the glasses_.

The physical movements are good - or perhaps the productivity is good - but it's not enough, and when the food is put away and the dishes are clean Thor still feels like he's on the verge of collapse.

_Inhale squeeze, exhale release._

He walks down the hallway to the bedroom and tries to focus.

_Inhale squeeze, exhale release._

The door is closed, and Thor stops to listen for the sounds of Loki crying.

_Inhale squeeze, exhale release._

Silence.

He opens the door tentatively, and sees Loki sitting up on the bed tracing runes with tear-streaked cheeks.

Guilt bubbles low in his belly and makes his knees shake. There's no function left in him but to ask for help.

"Loki, I need the calming spell you performed this morning."

He doesn't even recognize his own voice.

Loki looks up at him, equally alarmed, but he doesn't argue or ask questions. He immediately raises his hand at Thor and warmth washes over him at the same instant he spies glittering green.

It could be a placebo effect for all Thor knows, but a few seconds later he is able to breathe.

Thor lets out a sigh so heavy it makes his shoulders slump. He stays in the doorway, closing his eyes and gripping the doorknob for support while he enjoys the freedom of a deep belly breath.

"Thank you," he says in a voice he knows.

"What happened?" Loki asks, still staring at him with wide eyes and a furrow in his brow.

Thor shakes his head and rubs his face. "I just need to sleep. Why aren't you under the covers?" he answers, deflecting.

It's plain from Loki's expression that he doesn't accept Thor's answer, but he doesn't press it. "My shirt is still wet," he says.

Easily remedied.

"Here," Thor says, stepping to the dresser and grateful for more physical tasks to focus on. "You can wear mine. I wasn't planning on using it anyway."

He pulls it out of the drawer and tosses it to his brother, whose face says there are a million words that want to come out. But Loki is silent, and waits for Thor to turn back to the dresser before tugging his wet top off.

"I'm going to shower," Thor says, taking his pajama pants with him as he exits.

He hurries through the bathroom, eager to get to sleep. When he steps out of the shower, he furiously towels off and tugs his pajama bottoms on.

They feel every bit as lovely as Thor imagined they would and it further relaxes his mind.

The light is off in their bedroom, and when Thor comes in he is relieved to see Loki is under the covers with one arm above his head playing with his curls. Just like last night, though, the moonlight illuminates his brother's open eyes.

Thor closes the door and then climbs into bed, pleased beyond measure that he gets to sleep on an actual mattress tonight. When his limbs are settled and the covers are nicely positioned, Thor turns to his brother.

"I'm sorry," he says quietly.

Loki closes his eyes and shakes his head. "It's not your fault, Thor."

Clearly it _was_ Thor's fault.

"Are you okay?"

Loki's eyes stay closed and he takes a shaky breath. "Are you?"

That's an answer as much as a diversion. Neither of them are okay - no one is okay. This is a town full of traumatized people who need so much more than food and furniture, and Thor doesn't know how to help them.

He wants to reach down and grab his brother's hand, to relieve and to ground himself. The safe compromise is rolling onto his side to face his brother and saying,

"I won't make the chicken again."

Even with his eyes shut, he knows Loki can hear his smile and his brother's lips curve to sport a matching one. Loki opens his eyes and turns to look at Thor.

"It was the beans, Thor."

"We'll find a vegetable you like, Loki."

Loki turns the rest of his body to aim at his brother, mirroring Thor. "We will _not_."

"Lettuce?"

"No."

The brothers close their eyes again.

"Celery?"

"Bleugh."

"Kale?"

"Horrible."

They fall asleep after Thor suggests brussel sprouts.

oooooo

"Thor," grumbles a sleepy voice that Thor is delighted to wake up to, "Get the door."

Thor groans and slowly blinks his eyes open, wincing at the unfiltered sunlight streaming into the bedroom.

Loki's eyes are still closed, and he's still on his side facing Thor and away from the window.

The sight takes Thor's breath away, and he wishes his eye had a way to photograph this view so that he might enjoy it at least once a minute, every day for the rest of his life. Beneath the covers, their pajama-clad knees are close enough to each other that Thor can feel the warmth of his brother's lovely body reaching out and whispering 'good morning' to him. The sweetest berry lips Thor has ever seen are slightly parted, relaxed and unbothered, letting slow even breathing slip in and out of a very sleepy God of Mischief.

For all his complaining about getting no rest in a shared bed, Loki certainly looks like he's drifting back into a deep slumber. Thor is grateful for it, their brains each desperately need the recovery time, and it is possible that last night was Loki's first proper sleep since before Sakaar.

A gentle rap on the front door startles Thor from his reverie and he quickly slips out of bed. He doesn't stop to change out of his pajamas before answering the door, not wanting another knock to wake his roommates.

Heimdall stands before him, looking alert and rested. He raises an amused eyebrow at Thor's state of dishevel and steps aside so Thor can see behind him.

A jet sits on a grassy bank at the bottom of the hill, and Thor can make out the figures of Tony and Bruce.

"Your friends have arrived," Heimdall says. "Shall I tell them you'll be down in a moment?"

Thor rubs his eye to shake the sleep out, and then shields it from the sunlight as it adjusts to the brightness. His friends likely won't care that he's only dressed in sleep clothes, but he takes this question as a suggestion from Heimdall and nods.

"I will be quick," Thor assures.

Heimdall nods to him and steps away to welcome the Avengers.

Thor stops in the bathroom, to relieve himself, and splash some water on his alarming face. He supposes that it will take more than one night of decent rest to help calm the shadows under his eyes. The cold water helps, but two thousand hours of unconsciousness would be better.

Last night brought him troubling dreams. While he fell asleep with wonderful images of his brother dancing in his head, when the switch to unconsciousness flipped it set loose everything Thor was actively trying not to dwell on.

He dreamt that a huge cloud appeared over their new town, and that when he tried to use his powers to send it away it grew darker and darker until it became impossible to see. The people screamed and cried, and Thor couldn't find Loki. When the cloud turned into a ship and the darkness was filled with flashes of light from guns and a cruel cackle, Thor had shut down. He tried to run, but found his legs were so heavy he couldn't lift them. He spotted Loki, finally, fighting to keep his eyes open as his body bore more and more weight, and when Thanos reached out and wrapped a hand around his brother's neck Thor didn't have the strength to save him.

It had morphed into something else by the time Thor woke up, but the image of Loki having the life squeezed out of him stood sharply in Thor's mind.

Tears appear in his eyes at the thought, and he splashes more water onto his face to wash them away.

_Loki is safe and asleep in our bed, probably dreaming about being praised, _Thor assures himself.

Waking up to see his brother's face, alive and breathing, was as much a relief as a joy.

Thor feels he could do with a warm shower to soothe his nerves, but there isn't time. He flips the bathroom light off and goes to change.

The bedroom is so bright even without the light on. The light makes Loki's hair look strikingly glossy, and his curls spill over the pillow to fan out the effect. Loki is still curled on his left side with his eyes closed.

"Who was it?" he grumbles when Thor shuts the bedroom door.

"Heimdall. He was letting me know that Tony and Bruce are here," Thor answers.

Loki sits up a bit, eyes open but exhausted.

"Go back to sleep," Thor soothes. "I'll take care of everything with them."

His brother doesn't lie back down right away, and Thor is tempted to climb back into bed and tell Tony to go home so he can make sure Loki goes back to sleep. It would be selfish and impractical, but even more calming than a hot shower.

He turns away from the tempting sight and tugs his pajama bottoms off, kicking them off his feet completely.

The only other set of clothes he has consists of a red plaid long-sleeved shirt and grey jeans that are a touch too tight on his thighs. Much of the clothing distributed to his people looks the same, and the single shirt and bottoms beside Thor's in the dresser that belong to his brother are identical in all but color.

But they are clean, and smell fresh, and it feels great to put on something breathable and light that he can move freely in. Perhaps now that Loki is no longer 'saving' his magic, as he claimed, he can employ a spell to clean their leathers until they can rebuild a wardrobe.

When Thor finishes buttoning his pants and turns around, Loki is up and making the bed.

"You don't need to do that," Thor says, smoothing his shirt down and thrilling at the feel of the fabric.

Loki looks at him, annoyed, and continues his task. Whether he makes Thor's side of the bed orderly and fluffs his brother's pillow out of the desire for symmetry or a kindness to Thor is unclear, but when Loki is satisfied that the simple bedding is arranged as neatly as possible he walks to the dresser and pushes Thor out of the way.

"Are you coming with me?" Thor asks, amused at the way Loki grimaces at the modest clothing provided for him.

"I'm not going to hide in here like some kind of frightened animal, Thor," Loki mutters, shoving the drawer shut harder than necessary.

Thor steps out of his brother's way to avoid being shoved a second time as Loki takes his clothes and stalks out of the room. He hears the bathroom door shut and tries to sweep away any disappointment over his brother not changing in front of him.

He glances at the bed and does admit that the room looks nicer with the blankets pressed evenly across the mattress and the pillows plump and resting against the wall. In deference to his brother's wishes for an attractive room, Thor bends down to retrieve his pajamas from the floor and folds them as best he knows before placing them into a drawer.

A small act of love for his brother, but an act nonetheless.

When Loki comes out of the bathroom, scowling, Thor has to bite his lip to hold in his laughter.

Perhaps he is just too used to seeing Loki dressed as a prince of Asgard, in fine fabrics and polished armor, but this clothing does _not_ suit him.

From Thor's time on Earth, he knows how popular and versatile jeans are and that many people have multiple pairs of them in varying colors and styles. Thor has worn them and fully intends to collect more, perhaps ones that don't love his thighs quite so much, but Loki's gorgeous legs are not made to be buried in denim. Perhaps if he had something in a slimmer cut to reveal more of the shape of his limbs, but the charcoal pair he has is too loose.

Between the natural state of his curls, the too large pants, and a shirt in Thor's size, Loki looks centuries younger than he is. Only the purple below his eyes lets on that this skinny boy is tired from a life exhaustingly lived.

"Ready?" Thor asks, still attempting to hide his amusement to avoid a fight.

Loki gestures down at himself and glares at Thor. "Did you choose this for me?"

His fury magnifies the absurdity, and Thor has to clench his hands into fists to remain neutral when he answers.

"Everyone got the same clothes, Loki," he answers truthfully, stepping back as though revealing himself to show that they match.

Loki crosses his arms and pouts. "This doesn't fit! I look ridiculous!"

Thor raises his hands in a pacifying way. "Korg and Miek are still asleep," he says in a pointedly quiet voice. "You are welcome to wear your leathers, but isn't this much more comfortable?"

There's a flash of green Thor knows well, and Loki's civilian garb is replaced with the same outfit he had from before. He grimaces as the state of it, plainly dirty and dull, and pouts at Thor as though it's his fault that Loki's choices of attire are so unappealing.

"Give your skin a break and wear something that feels good," Thor says, holding out his arms demonstratively. "I feel ten pounds lighter having this on."

He's clearly not happy about it, but with another flash of green Loki returns to his green plaid and jeans.

They don't have new shoes yet, and while Thor is content to walk around barefoot until that can be remedied, Loki would rather eat his own hair than reveal unnecessary skin to others. The bottoms of Loki's jeans are loose enough to slide over his boots, and once he has them on Thor opens the front door to head outside.

Heimdall is waiting once more, and Thor is genuinely delighted to see Tony, Bruce, and Natasha standing beside him.

Thor laughs as he pulls Bruce into a hug first.

"It's wonderful to see you standing, Bruce," he says, clapping his friend on the back and squeezing him tightly.

"You too, Thor," Bruce wheezes.

He staggers back a little when Thor releases him and turns his hugs to Tony.

"I can't thank you enough for your assistance," Thor says solemnly as he pulls the smaller man into an embrace.

Tony accepts the hug good-naturedly and grins when Thor lets go. "We'll see about that, I've got some projects that could use your input."

"I would be delighted to contribute in any way that I can," Thor replies before turning to Natasha.

"Long time, Thor," she says, smirking in that quiet way she is so skilled in.

Thor laughs and hugs her as well. If it displeases her, she lets it go for his sake and permits the exchange.

"It is wonderful to see you, Natasha. Thank you for coming. Can I offer you some water or…" Thor pauses, mentally taking stock of the options in his kitchen.

Tony waves a dismissive hand. "We ate on the flight."

Thor looks to Bruce and Natasha, for their answers, and sees her looking at something behind Thor.

"Ah, yes," Thor says, turning and holding out an arm for his brother to join them at Thor's side. "You remember Loki."

Speeches, vows, examples of Loki's good deeds - Thor is prepared for anything, any surprise objections they may have. He would like to avoid any fighting or issues that would trickle into complications for his people, but above all else he will make it clear that Loki is here to stay.

It's non-negotiable.

"Your hair is different," Tony remarks, pushing his sunglasses down his nose and looking pointedly at Loki.

Before Loki can reply, with something undoubtedly rude, Tony continues.

"This is better, the mullet wasn't doing you any favors," Tony adds before replacing his eye wear.

Beside him, Loki looks murderous, but Thor wraps an arm around his brother's shoulders as a sign of deliberate solidarity and to keep Loki from summoning a dagger.

"We were lucky to have water supplied to each house on our first night," Thor says, nodding at Bruce. "Did he tell you what the conditions were like on the Statesman?"

Tony shudders performatively. "Everyone taking turns sleeping on the same sheets? I would have lost my shit."

"Loki wasn't keen on that either," Thor says, squeezing Loki for emphasis. Natasha looks amused at this, and Thor counts that as a win.

His brother is unbelievably tense beneath his arm, but he's not making threats or giving anyone a reason to lock him up and that's likely as much as Thor can hope for at this time.

"Will Bruce be staying with you?" Thor adds quickly, hoping to veer the conversation onto a distracting focus.

"We can share custody," Tony answers as he pulls out his phone and reads something off of it. "Pep says 'hi'."

Bruce takes off his glasses and wipes the lenses with his shirt. "Tony's got a whole set of rooms for me, Nat too," he says, nodding at her.

She's still watching the brothers, and from his peripheral vision he can see Loki frowning at her.

Hoping to nip any violence a staring contest with Loki might lead to, Thor claps his brother's back hard enough to startle him. "That's wonderful to hear, though you are welcome here at any time."

"That's your house?" Bruce asks, pointing behind them to the home he and Loki emerged from as he replaces his glasses.

Thor turns around to look at it, already proud of the new space, and beams when he answers.

"That's our home. Would you like to see inside?"

He can see Loki direct his frown at his brother, but Thor ignores it. There's nothing personal on display yet, and without saying this in front of their guests, he reasons this is the best time for a 'tour' without anything of Loki's for them to see.

But Loki has always been finicky about having other people in his space. Thor has to walk a line between giving Loki what he wants and respecting the privacy of their shared space, while maintaining these relationships with others. He hopes that Loki can understand that, and gives his brother another squeeze to will it so.

"Show us your digs, your highness," Tony answers as he slips his phone back into his pants pocket.

It occurs to Thor, as he stops to actually admire how sharply Tony is dressed, that his friends look well put-together. Even Bruce is wearing a suit, certainly borrowed or gifted by Stark, but he looks smart and neat.

Natasha has a way of looking poised and collected no matter how simply she is dressed. It's the same effect Loki has on people who don't know what a serial clown he is.

He's not ashamed to be wearing such plain, ill-fitting clothes, as everyone is well aware of the situation Thor and his people are in, but he better understands why Loki was so reticent to be seen like this. It's an odd way of feeling knocked down even further, even though Thor should be feeling nothing but grateful.

But it cannot be helped.

"Let us show you inside," Thor says, steering Loki around to walk back to the house as the rest of the group follow.

Loki shakes off his arm.

"The upstairs apartment is Heimdall's," Thor explains. "And the downstairs is for Loki, myself, and two companions that Bruce knows: Korg and Miek."

"That's quite a group," Bruce replies.

As they herd inside, Thor suddenly feels ashamed at how modest the dwelling is. Maybe it's old arrogance, or unlearning how to live as a spoiled prince in a golden privileged realm, but Thor wishes there was more than empty space and a few bags of food in the kitchen to call home.

He passed on ordering any furniture for their home beyond the beds and dressers, not wanting to take anything away that could go to someone else's home. Other families received sofas and chairs and tables to eat off of.

"Nice space. Are you waiting on another delivery?" Tony asks as he walks through the empty room.

"The deliveries were completed last night. Our people have more," Thor answers quickly. "And our home will be filled in time."

Tony nods and flips a light switch on and off. "I'll get you squared away."

"That is kind of you, but most unnecessary. You're already doing enough -"

"Thor, seriously. It's nothing. Consider it payment for all the work I'm going to enlist you to do," Tony interrupts as he meanders into the kitchen and opens the fridge. "I'll get you some beer, too."

Unsure of what to say, Thor glances at his brother who is watching Tony like a hawk.

"Thank you, Tony."

"It's good for him to spend money on someone besides himself," Natasha says quietly, so only the party still by the door can hear her.

Bruce huffs a soft laugh and adjusts his new suit in agreement.

"Bedrooms down here?" Tony asks, gesturing down the hallway.

"Yes, Korg and Miek are on the left and are still asleep," Thor warns, hoping Tony's voice hasn't already woken them up.

Loki puffs up indignantly and turns to his brother. "Thor!" he gripes in a low voice.

"Nice bathroom, good tub," Tony murmurs to himself as he sticks his head into the small space and takes stock of it.

Thor left the door to his and Loki's bedroom open, so it's all too easy for Tony to stroll right in.

The group follows, with a furious Loki, and when they are crowded into the small space, Thor finds Tony looking at the single bed with pursed lips.

"Tight quarters," he says finally, after Bruce accidentally lets out a tiny gasp at the sight.

Natasha shields her smile by looking down until she's schooled it. She gives Thor a knowing look that nearly makes him squirm. She cannot _possibly_ be aware of what the single bed means to him.

"We make do," Thor answers nonchalantly, silently hoping Tony won't offer to purchase a second bed. He can hardly protest about wanting to sleep beside Loki in front of everyone without having his brother attack him.

Tony is still looking at the bed, and when he looks up it's to give Thor the same look Natasha had.

_What the hell?_

"Shall we start handing out the goods?" Tony asks, clapping his hands together.

"Yes, let's," Thor replies, stepping back into the hallway and indicating for the others to follow him.

Korg and Meek's door is still closed, and it sounds quiet inside. Thor hopes his roommates are untroubled at having these strangers in their home.

Heimdall is still in the living room, waiting patiently.

"Bruce, give me a hand with the first batch," Tony says, heading for the door. "B-R-B, Thor."

"B-R-B?" Thor repeats, looking to Natasha for clarification.

"Be right back," she explains in her even, matter-of-fact voice.

Thor nods, unsure of why such a short phrase needed to be reduced even further, but there was more of Earth for him to learn about yet. "I'm sorry there's nowhere for you to sit," he says, feeling less uncomfortable about it in front of her than Stark, who Thor knows is used to luxury.

Natasha shakes her head and looks at him kindly. "It's a nice home, Thor. No one expects you to have a Pottery Barn showroom on display three days after your entire population survived an attack on a spaceship."

Heimdall smiles and nods once, agreeing and assuring. He is not embarrassed in the slightest.

"Making the bed is a nice touch," she adds.

Thor gestures to a still prickly Loki. "That was all Loki."

His brother is not soothed by the recognition and narrows his eyes at Thor. It's plain to Thor that Loki is unmoved by such comments from people as he would rather not have them in his space in the first place, but Thor is thankful for how gracious Natasha is being.

"Looks good," she says, directing it at Loki.

Thor looks pointedly at his brother and raises his eyebrows expectantly when Loki gives him a dismissive mocking shrug at the look. In much the same way he had after their nap yesterday, Thor raises his hand in the suggestion of a ticklish claw, and Loki swats it away.

"Thank you," Loki says, sounding neither sincere nor grateful.

Again, it's probably as much as Thor can hope for at this time, and he offers Natasha an apologetic smile.

She appears amused, having watched the interaction between the brothers, and she shakes her head to let him know that it's fine.

"Okay!" Tony announces as he bursts back in through the front door dragging a sleek black suitcase behind him. "Let's get started with Casa del Gods."

He wheels the device to the center of the living room and lays it on its side.

"I've got the internet going up right now, so you'll all be connected in a few hours. Each house will have a private network, that's important for security," he adds, throwing the last words over his shoulder, as he unzips the case and opens it. "Your phones are all on the private carrier service Stark Industries developed. Unlimited data, and does anyone even have a limit on texts and calls anymore?" he asks, looking between Natasha and Bruce. The latter came in behind Tony carrying an identical case and shrugs at the question.

"Either way," Tony continues as he grabs two devices and then stands to hand them to Thor and Heimdall first. "You'll be able to get in contact with anyone you need. None of this 'cap' business - it's bullshit. And these are on a separate operating system from what the rest of the world uses, but since you're all from outer space it'll be easier to learn this than unlearn iOS or Android."

Thor turns to his brother, who looks equally puzzled but angrier about it.

"Wireless chargers are the way of the future," Tony says, turning back to the case and pulling out two flat round pads with cords attached. "You just plug these in and then lay your phone down and voila."

Heimdall nods and accepts what Tony hands him.

"I'll show you how to use them," Bruce interjects, correctly interpreting the faces of the aliens in the room.

"Got one for you too, Edward Scissorhands," Tony says, handing a phone and charger to Loki.

Thor holds up the claw and Loki immediately says, "Thank you."

"What a polite young man," Tony says with a grin.

Heimdall actually snorts at that, something Thor isn't sure he's ever heard the old god do before.

"We've got computers," Tony presses on before the polite young man can stab him. "And I'll help you set up a home office, you'll need that for the jobs I've got lined up."

"Already?" Thor asks, amazed at how efficient his friend is.

Bruce gives Thor a look that suggests he should not sound as excited as he does. Thor looks to Natasha and her expression echoes it.

"You, my friend, and his pissy little brother, will be shiny new employees of Stark Industries!"

Thor holds up the claw before Loki can even open his mouth. "I'm truly grateful. What sort of job is it?"

The last thing in Tony's suitcase is an oddly shaped black box with wires coming out of the back. Tony stands and looks around until he spies an outlet in the corner and moves close to it to plug the wire in.

"It's customer service adjacent - easy to train for so you can get up and running. There's always a need for that and it can be done remotely," Tony says, standing back up once he's finished messing with the box. "Anyone who needs a job can start with that immediately. Pay is good, benefits, yada yada, I have no idea how to insure a 401K for _deities_ but that's a Tony-problem."

"I'll stick around for a few days to get everyone up and running, make sure there are no issues getting online, and then get you and smiley here," Tony says, jerking his head at Loki, "into training."

"I would also be grateful to take this job," Heimdall says, wisely and proactively interrupting Loki - the theme for the morning.

"Can do. I'll pop upstairs and set up your router next," Tony says, pulling out his phone and speedily tapping into it. When he's finished, he takes the handle of the suitcase Bruce carried in and wheels it behind him as he heads for the door.

"Thor, if you want to come we can knock out everyone's house and get people set up with their phones," Tony calls over his shoulder as he exits without waiting for a reply. Bruce and Heimdall go with him, and leave the door open for Thor and Natasha.

"Do you want to stay here?" Thor asks Loki as he goes to place his phone and charger on the kitchen counter, for lack of a better place. He reaches out for his brother's as well and Loki nods as he hands his things to Thor before shooting a sideways glance at Natasha.

Thor takes the hint and smiles warmly at her. "Natasha?"

The lovely assassin rolls her shoulders back and surveys the space. "I'll stay here, if that's alright. That nine hour flight was a lot of Tony and my ears could use a break."

It's certainly alright with Thor, and he knows Natasha can more than hold her own against Loki, but his brother's face says quite plainly that such an arrangement is unwelcome.

"Of course that's alright," Thor says to her before reaching out and gesturing for Loki to join him. "Loki, come talk to me for a moment."

He guides his brother into the kitchen as Natasha grants the brother's privacy by walking to the opposite wall in the living room and taking a seat against it.

"Please behave," Thor murmurs to his brother. He grabs one of their new glasses, to give purpose to his sequestering Loki, and rinses it in the sink, though it's never been used, and then fills it from the tap.

"I don't see why I should be forced to entertain someone who hates me in my own home," Loki hisses, looking at the glass in Thor's hand the way a cat would before knocking it over.

This was not an entirely unfair grievance, except that Thor was almost certain Natasha did not hate Loki. He could not imagine that someone with her brilliance would subject themselves to such an easily avoidable situation if it involved being near someone they hated. She could go down to the jet, or walk through the town if she wanted to get away, and Thor took her choice to stay with Loki as a courtesy.

He hands the glass to Loki and reaches for another, rinsing and filling it and then handing it to Loki as well.

"She doesn't hate you, and this is a chance for you to show her that you are not a threat and there's no reason to lock you up," Thor whispers. He places his hands on Loki's shoulders and presses their foreheads together. "Please, please for me just sit with her until I come back. We won't be long."

"You have to go to every house!" Loki spits back. "You'll be gone for hours!"

Thor squeezes Loki's bony limbs and knocks their heads together, eliciting an embarrassed scowl from his brother who looks over at Natasha and is clearly aware of how much she can see Thor manhandling him.

"I'll make it up to you - I'll get you better clothes," Thor promises, grinning when Loki holds back whatever he was going to say as he considers this.

He's silent, looking between Thor and the waters.

"Deal?" Thor asks cautiously.

"A suit - I want a suit," Loki finally answers.

Thor squeezes him again. "Done." He turns to head out of the kitchen with Loki behind him.

"Two - I want two suits-"

"Hush!" Thor mutters as he waves a hand behind him to quiet his difficult sibling. Natasha, who was politely looking at her phone during his exchange with Loki, looks up as the brothers approach.

"Loki is going to stay here with you, so if you need anything just ask him," Thor says.

Loki raises an eyebrow at him and Natasha smiles as Thor looks around and realizes why his words are questionable. "I hope you don't need anything," he adds.

"I'll be fine," she assures in that calm, certain way of hers.

"I will be back soon," Thor says. He locks eyes with his brother and whispers, "Suit" before turning for the door.

Before he shuts it behind him, Thor glances inside and sees his brother hand Natasha one of the water glasses.

oooooo

Loki was right, it did take hours.

But by suppertime Thor, Tony, Bruce, and Heimdall are finished up and ready to eat.

As they start up the hill to the house, Thor spots Korg and Miek sitting on the grass out front. Korg waves to him as they approach.

"Hello, Bruce, it's nice to see you again," Korg says cheerfully. Miek squeaks beside him.

Bruce waves and nods. "Good to see you, too."

"Tony, this is Korg and Miek," Thor says.

Ever the businessman, Tony extends his arm and greets them without batting an eye at their inhuman forms. Perhaps his encounters with the Chitauri were disillusioning enough and now nothing would phase the Avengers.

"Nice to meet you," Tony greets, stepping back after their shake. "The good doctor here has sung your praises."

Korg places a hand on his heart. "Oh, Bruce is a good man. We're very fond of him."

Said good man looks uncomfortably pleased by this unexpected compliment and shakes his head.

"He's okay," Tony replies with a grin, nudging his blushing friend. "Is everyone ready for some grub?"

"Dinner sounds wonderful. Oh dear, should we have prepared something for you to come home to?" Korg wonders, more to himself than the others.

"That's not necessary - Korg, is my brother inside?" Thor asks.

Korg nods and stands before offering an arm to help Miek up as well. "He and that nice lady were having a very serious talk, so Miek and I came outside to give them some space."

'Serious talk' can mean so many things when it comes to Loki, and Thor prays that it's good news.

"Ah, well we had better go relieve her," Thor says, walking to the front door.

Inside, the sight before him surprises Thor into a delighted smile.

Still leaning against the same wall, Natasha and Loki sit next to each other with the pillows from his and Loki's bed behind their backs. Their legs are folded underneath them, shoes discarded, and they each have one earbud in, with the connecting string plugged into Natasha's phone which she holds between them.

Loki looks up when Thor enters, and while Thor was prepared to be chastised for taking so long he is blown away by the smile on his brother's face.

"Hey, Thor," Natasha says as she tugs her earbud out and puts down the phone. Loki removes his as well and places it on the ground beside hers.

"Hello, you two," Thor replies, feeling unbelievably grateful for happening upon this scene. "How did it go?"

The pair rise from the floor and stretch.

"You're right, that's not sustainable for long periods," Loki says to Natasha, unaware of Thor staring at the half inch of skin exposed on his tummy while he stretches.

"I'll help you pick out chairs," Natasha says as she cracks her neck. "It was fine," she says, answering Thor.

He looks to his brother and raises an eyebrow. Loki picks up their water glasses and carries them into the kitchen, whispering to his brother when he passes.

"Two suits."

oooooo


	6. Shifting

oooooo

When the unbelievably rude sun's beams rise to a brightness that sleep cannot ignore, Thor winces, groans, and stretches. His right leg inches just a bit too far into what could be considered 'Loki's side of the bed' and yet it does not encounter a bony shin.

Alarmed, Thor jerks up and prepares to go hunt down his baby brother.

This glorious quest is deemed unnecessary, or perhaps completed, when Thor sees that in lieu of the body he expected to find sleeping beside him, there is a green snake curled up and sleeping peacefully.

With a relieved sigh, Thor relaxes back under the covers and turns to face the little tree python.

Loki went to sleep late last night, and Thor knows this because when he jerked awake after another nightmare and the clock on his new phone read '3:27', Loki was still awake and tracing runes onto the wall.

"Come to bed," Thor had croaked, unable to do more than blink once before his eyelid said 'fuck you'.

"I'm busy."

He wanted to wait until he felt the mattress dip and knew that Loki was warm and comfortable, but he was teetering on the edge of slipping back into deep sleep himself. The sheets were so soft on his naked chest, for he hadn't seen the point of taking his sleep shirt back from Loki, and felt himself sinking into the bed and imagined being swallowed like a small stone disappearing under moss as spring's rapture thrives.

It was impossible to stay awake.

Now, with daylight streaming in as loudly as it can, Thor stretches his sleep drunk limbs once more and admires the verdant little reptile beside him.

It is tempting to reach out and stroke the small head, for Asgardians are not immune from the primitive instinct to caress tiny cute creatures, but Thor keeps his hands to himself lest he get bitten.

Over the millennia, Loki has taken thousands of different forms. Even before he studied magic with Frigga and acquired skills to master the art of seidr, hardly a day passed without the child slipping into another's image, or disguising himself as a plant or object during hide and seek only to out himself to his mother when her books started giggling.

Far and away, it seemed Loki's favorite thing was to become a snake. Thor _loved_ snakes, and looking back he cannot recall if that love was born independently of the association with Loki, or if he has been in love with his brother for so long that snakes were scooped up in the adoration package.

On more than one occasion, likely hundreds, in fact, Loki had transformed into a piece of parchment or a bird and attempted to sneak in somewhere that he was not supposed to.

The brothers never figured out how Frigga and Odin were always able to spot him right away.

One night many years ago, when they could not have been older than eight or nine, after the boys were tucked into their little beds and had received their goodnight kisses from mama, Thor decided he wanted a treat from the kitchens. Loki, always eager for a bit of fun, volunteered to turn into a cat and nick some blueberries and chocolate. Thor agreed to the plan and praised his brother's cleverness.

He'd watched Loki close his eyes and shrink down until a tiny black kitten appeared on top of his blankets. The little cat, purring loudly, jumped onto the floor and waited by the door for Thor to let him out.

"Good luck, Loki," Thor had whispered as Loki rubbed up against his ankle and then slipped out into the hallway.

Thor remembers wiggling with excitement that night, and that he hadn't been able to get back in bed and lie down with so much adrenaline running through his tiny body.

Looking back, it must have been only a few minutes later and not the eternity it felt at the time before the door opened once more and Frigga entered holding Loki's hand.

Her youngest child sadly climbed back into his bed and threw Thor a defeated look.

Frigga had tried so hard not to be amused at her children sneaking out of bed, but between Thor's incredulous shock at their plan not working and Loki's obscenely dramatic pouting, she laughed and motioned for Thor to come sit with her beside Loki.

"My sweet boys," she had said as she pulled Thor onto her lap.

"How did you figure out it was Loki? Did you change back?" Thor said, turning from his mother to his offended brother.

Loki did not care for his mother to hold Thor and not him, and he _really_ didn't appreciate being accused of ruining their plot for snacks by doing something as foolish as transforming back. He sat up and tugged on Frigga's arm to get her to lie down so he could take her side opposite Thor.

"_No_, I didn't, Thor!"

"How could you tell, mama?" Thor had asked, oblivious to Loki's bristling.

Frigga had squeezed them both tight. "A mother knows her babies," she'd answered with kisses to their heads.

Thor took that as 'the cat looked like Loki'. "Does Loki have to practice magic more so you can't see him?"

Loki had lifted his head up from Frigga's chest to glare over at Thor.

Thor remembers seeing her stroke Loki's hair to keep him from fussing. "While your brother is tremendously skilled with magic, he does not need it to shapeshift," Frigga answered.

"Huh?"

"Loki can use magic to make himself look like something or someone else with an illusion, but he also has the ability to actually take that shape and that's something he was born with," Frigga explained.

From the tiny smile on his face, Loki was proud and pleased to be recognized for his talents, and snuggled closer to his mother to show his appreciation.

"But if you could tell it was him then doesn't that mean he has to practice more?"

Frigga caught Loki's wrist before he could smack his brother, and laughed again.

"It's my job to be able to spot you two. Mothers must be able to see their children and always know where they are. That way I can keep you safe."

Thor couldn't remember much after that, but he was fairly certain that he and his brother refused to let their mom go back to her own room and made her tell them stories until they fell asleep with her arms around them.

_Loki the shapeshifter._

While Frigga was able to sense or see when it was Loki, she could usually also discern if Loki was using magic to glamour himself or if he had actually shifted. Thor needed to see the transformation to know, and the familiar sparkle of Loki's green usually tipped off the use of seidr.

At this moment, with his brother sleeping, Thor assumes this is proper shapeshifting.

He watches the little snake for the better part of an hour before reluctantly leaving the cozy space to relieve himself. The living room is visible from the hallway, and Thor is surprised to see its contents before his morning brain recalls that Tony paid to have it furnished.

Curtains are Thor's next highest priority, and as soon as he receives his first paycheck he is going to ask Loki to select something for their bedroom. The sun rises early in summer, and he's already having trouble sleeping.

The water gets onto the counter a bit when Thor splashes it on his face. A morning and evening bath seems gluttonous, particularly when Thor knows that Earth does not have the same natural resources as Asgard, but he would like to wake up his whole body with a cold blast from the shower.

Hot coffee will have to suffice in the shower's place, and Thor makes a pleased little smile upon remembering that in addition to living room furnishings, the kitchen is also better stuffed with all manner of delicious things. Coffee was a delight to encounter during his banishment, and Thor never found a proper substitute for it off of Earth. That such a lovely thing could come from a bean so small was humbling, and gives Thor a rush of optimism at what other wonders he has yet to uncover on this tiny planet.

Before heading into the kitchen to make breakfast, Thor sticks his head into the bedroom and sees the little snake still wound up on the bed.

He'll make extra food for Loki.

Korg and Miek don't require the same sustenance that Thor and his brother do. Their bodies can do more with less, and Korg expressed that while he greatly enjoyed the ritual of dining with cherished friends, he could nurse a beverage instead of feasting each time.

Loki, on the other hand…

The coffee is already ground and easy to make. The little machine is red, to honor Thor's colors, and easy to use. Stark made the purchases and the individual product selections.

When he gets the bag open a lovely smell rushes out to greet him.

Thor takes a deep inhale, burying his nose into the mouth of the bag, and then lets out a happy sigh.

He's genuinely excited for Loki to taste this, and hopes his brother will delight in it as much as Thor does. Though he knows Loki will be less likely to admit to it.

When the coffee machine is on and good to go, Thor switches to food.

He plans to visit every home again today and see how people are faring. It's only been two days since Tony, Bruce, and Natasha flew back to the United States, so no one has had a wealth of time to get used to their devices or navigating the Internet. Thor is a part of that group as well, and hasn't even attempted to go online since his friend departed.

The days were spent making lists and plans for things to be built, established, and organized. Thor needs to be involved in every step of the new towns foundation, refusing to let any of his people shoulder even a sliver of responsibility more than they need to.

They are all extraordinarily blessed to have the assistance of Stark's capital, and Thor wonders if the option of building a new life for so many would even be possible without having a rich friend.

He glances up from the frying pan loaded with bacon and takes in the new view of the living and dining room.

While Tony offered and nearly insisted on getting top of the line _everything_, Thor wanted to have what his people had. He consented to a round wooden dining table, four chairs, a couch long enough for Loki to lie down on, and two additional plush reclining chairs for everyone else.

"A T.V. - at least let me get you set up with a PS4," Tony had pleaded.

But Thor didn't want anything that wasn't shared by everyone. Tony had done enough by guaranteeing him a job, and soon Thor would have his own money for a PS whatever.

The only extra thing sitting in Thor's home that had not yet made its way to the rest of the houses was an additional table in the corner to function as a workspace. There were two small chairs on either side, for him and Loki, and the new computers sat on top.

Tony assured Thor that no one would go hungry or want for essentials and that people could take their time recovering from the trauma of losing their home and so many loved ones before they needed to worry about employment. That was a weight off of his shoulders as Thor knew he people needed it, but did not want to extend that graciousness to himself. He firmly requested to start right away, and Tony scheduled him and Loki to begin their training tomorrow.

Now Loki was not present for the part of the day when it was determined that not everyone had to work immediately, and Thor was tempted to grant his brother the same space. But he also wanted Loki's image to stay reputable and dutiful, as he was still a prince and these were also Loki's people.

Thor snaps out of it when the bacon grease pops particularly loudly and the sizzle of the meat draws his gaze back down.

The coffee had finished brewing and between that and the fried pork the kitchen smells lovely. It's about to be even lovelier.

While Thor has no intention of revealing to Loki where he learned to make this particular dish, Darcy clued Thor into the magic of cutting out the center from a buttered slice of bread, putting an egg in the w¥hole, and then frying it. She shared that her mother used to make them for her as a child when she had a bad day.

Thor wanted to pass this expression of love through food onto his brother.

Carving a hole in the bread is tricky without the proper tools so Thor turns a glass upside down and uses the rim to gently cut the necessary space. Cookie cutters were an impractical luxury at this time, but Darcy had used a star shape that Thor found charming. Perhaps he could make Loki holiday shaped pieces when he could afford to.

He's onto cooking the fourth slice of bread when his brother wanders in looking sleepy.

"Good morning, sunshine," Thor says brightly as his sibling walks to the cabinet behind Thor and grabs a glass.

Loki doesn't answer him as he fills the glass with water. He chugs it, fills another, and sips it slowly.

"What is that?" he asks, lowering the glass and pointing to the coffee maker.

Thor slides the freshly cooked 'egg in a raft' onto a plate and turns around to see what Loki's asking about. "It's used for making that coffee drink I told you about. I thought we could have it with breakfast."

Loki narrows his eyes, and Thor knows it's because of his big-brother-insistence on keeping Loki fed, but he's either too sleepy or too hungry to be argumentative.

Instead he refills his glass once more and says, "When can we get my suit?"

The word 'we' sends a little thrill through Thor, and he turns back to the food so only the frying pan can see his smile.

"When we get paid," he answers.

Though he can't see it, he knows Loki is frowning at him.

"You promised me a suit, Thor," Loki grumbles, and Thor feels a weak kick on the back of his leg.

"And you'll get one. Now go sit down, cow," Thor says as he finishes assembling the plates with his handiwork.

When Loki walks by and in front of him Thor sees him glaring performatively and he shakes his head at his brother.

"Don't give me that. Look, I just made you breakfast, _your highness_."

Loki mumbles something quiet enough that Thor can't hear it, but loud enough that Thor knows it was said.

"Behave," Thor says as he walks the plates out and places one in front of his brother.

This word is amusing to Thor, but everytime he speaks it he can see visions of daggers dancing in his brother's eyes.

He grabs coffee for them as well, and holds a milk carton under his arm when he walks it back to the table. Loki will likely wish to make his sweet and flavorful, but Thor wants him to try it black first.

Loki hasn't touched his food yet, and Thor wonders if it's foolishly optimistic to believe that his brother is waiting for him to start eating.

"Now, you can add milk," Thor says, setting the carton down beside Loki's mug, "And sugar or other sweeteners. But have a sip of it like that to see what you think."

Thor sits and watches his brother take the mug and hold it up to his face, sniffing it. Loki takes a tentative sip, and immediately grimaces at his brother over the rim of the mug.

"Delicious, isn't it?" Thor says cheekily as he raises his own mug and makes a 'cheers' motion. When he takes a sip, though, he understands Loki's face.

It's _so bitter_. Perhaps he put in too many grounds…

He looks back at his brother to see Loki suppressing a grin.

"Just put a lot of milk in and maybe that will help. But it's good for helping you to wake up and feel alert," Thor says as he takes another sip and shudders.

"I don't need coffee to be alert, Thor."

"How much sleep did you get?"

Loki rolls his eyes and doesn't answer. "I'm going to make tea."

There is no sense in being wounded at the rejected coffee, as Thor doesn't care for it either, but he does feel a bit dejected at not having everything taken care of for his brother.

Thor tucks into his breakfast while Loki moves around the kitchen. Thor can hear him opening and closing cabinets and then letting out a put upon sigh.

"Where is the…"

With a mouthful of egg toast, Thor turns around and raises his eyebrows at his brother who looks most fussy indeed.

Loki's lips are pursed, annoyed, and Thor wipes his hands on his napkin and gets up to see what has vexed his sibling.

"What are you looking for?"

It's a fair question, since Loki did start to ask about the whereabouts of something, but he looks inexplicably pressed by it.

"I have to heat water for the tea," he answers, crossing his arms over his chest.

Thor pauses. Jane had used a kettle to heat water, and on Asgard there was a special pot used to hold water over a fire, but here…

With the limited kitchen stock Thor is able to mentally run through their options quickly, and bends to a bottom cabinet to retrieve a small saucepan. He doesn't hand it to Loki, but fills it with water himself and sets it on the stove top.

"These dials control the burners," Thor says as he turns the one for the saucepan to its highest setting. "This should work just fine."

Loki watches him and Thor can see his expression moving rapidly from annoyed to something more alarming. Maybe Loki feels like he's being talked down to or will insist he could have figured that out on his own - Thor's mind supplies a million possibilities for Loki's upsets as there are, likely, a million possibilities.

"I'll make your tea," Thor continues, hoping to nip anything involving yelling or tears in the bud. "If the toast gets cold it won't taste is good," he adds, nodding at the table to direct his brother to go sit back down.

His brother hesitates, and Thor sees Loki's eyes flick to the water and then back to Thor.

"This will just take a minute," Thor says.

Loki breaks off their eye contact and his eyes are now unquestionably sad. "I can make it myself, Thor. Go eat."

Thor knows his brother's words and tones well enough to know when protesting will lead to Loki turning into a shrieking harpy, and this is one of those times.

By the time Loki returns to the table with his mug, Thor has cleared his plate and is struggling to get his coffee down. He needs the caffeine, and would hate to waste it, but milk can only do so much.

He watches Loki sip his tea while his breakfast sits uneaten in front of him.

After a few minutes, Thor risks asking about it.

"Are you not hungry?"

Loki doesn't look at him and shakes his head.

Thor can tell when his brother is lying.

_Do you want me to go? Are you mad at me? Did I fuck up again? Should I make you something else?_

The questions stay in Thor's mind as he watches Loki finish his tea and then get up.

What does break free, before Thor can even think about it, is, "Where are you going?"

Again, Loki won't look at him as he walks his mug to the kitchen and places it in the sink.

"Out."

Thor stands up so fast it nearly knocks his chair over. "Where? Can I come with you?"

He sees Loki close his eyes and tighten his lips as he rinses out the mug.

"You have things to do today, Thor."

Scanning through the morning's details Thor cannot figure out what is prompting Loki's clipped, sad, and annoyed demeanor - save that it's Loki.

"I can do them later," Thor says, walking to the kitchen.

Loki sees him coming and cuts him off by walking out and around the divider to get to the door before Thor can stop him.

"No, Thor, you can't."

Instinct purer than any choice makes Thor's hand fly out to grab his brother's wrist as Loki starts through the doorway.

"You'll come back, right?"

Loki looks down at where Thor is holding him, flicks his eyes up to his brother's face, and nods.

It's with a wince that Thor releases Loki and watches him shift into a snowy owl and fly away.

oooooo

Thor had finished Loki's breakfast, cleaned the kitchen, and changed into his only outfit.

Duty bound and caring, he stopped at every home in the village to check after his people. With the same notebook from before, he kept a list of things to address and or tend to and categorized each need based on the immediacy of its necessity.

"Why do you keep looking at the sky?" a little girl asked.

"Halfva, don't interrupt," her mother admonished.

"But he looks up so much! Will we have a storm?"

Thor smiled and shook his head. "Not today."

He would not darken the clouds or endanger the air with lightning.

His brother wasn't home yet.

oooooo

"I hate this," Loki says, three minutes into their first day of training.

Thor made them breakfast again, and his second attempt at making coffee went much better than the first. His second mug sits beside his computer, no longer steaming. His brother refused to try the pot at all and went straight for the saucepan. Loki is on his fourth cup of tea, and it rests in front of Thor's with their cup handles nearly touching.

He looks up at his brother, who is scowling at his computer, and nudges Loki's leg under the table.

"Come now, brother, the day is early. What do you hate about it?"

"Acknowledge, align, assure," Loki reads off of the screen in front of him in a mocking voice, "I don't know these people! I'm not doing any of this."

Thor hides his amusement by taking a sip of coffee.

So far, he feels the job sounds quite easy, and is entirely prepared to be kind to people and assist them with their problems all day.

Loki, however, is Loki.

"What's the first thing you're going to buy when you get paid?" Thor asks, hoping to refocus his brother on something that will get him to perform these tasks obediently enough to keep Tony from having no choice but to terminate him.

His brother, still frowning, doesn't move his head as he flashes an unamused glance at Thor and looks back at his computer.

"We can get your suit," Thor suggests, nudging his brother's leg again.

"_You_ are paying for my suit, Thor," Loki replies, kicking him.

In Thor's eyes, the day passes quickly with the onslaught of so much information. The brothers had a scheduled lunch break, keeping track of their work hours by clicking a clock icon on their screen that tracked their time. Thor made sandwiches, and ate the rest of Loki's when his brother only had a few bites and then made more tea.

By six o'clock, they are "done".

"What would you like for dinner?" Thor asks as he stretches his arms towards the ceiling and pops his back.

Sitting for so long made him feel shrunken.

Loki, no more cheerful than when the day began, fumes.

"I have to get out of here."

Thor's heart panics. "What?"

"I need to go for a flight or a walk - I can't stay trapped in this -"

"Let's go for a walk," Thor interrupts. "Stretch our legs, pop our joints, come on," he says before Loki can protest and say that he wants to be alone again.

Even though he spent the day in Loki's company, there was barely time to speak to each other with all the material to cover and Thor takes this seriously enough to be thorough in his studies.

Loki glowers at the computer and follows Thor out the door.

It's lovely outside.

Hours still before the sun will set, but late enough in the day that the brother's are unlikely to sweat buckets from spending too much time outside.

The hill their home rests on leads down to what Thor considers the main road, which most of the buildings rest beside. There are a handful of streets that noodle off that are populated exclusively by homes, but the town is small.

Heading to the right leads to the dwellings and the soon-to-be populated empty spaces for stores and other happenings, and turning to the left leads out to unpaved untamed nature.

When the brothers reach the bottom of the hill, they silently and simultaneously turn left.

They're so close to the ocean that Thor can taste the salt, and the backdrop of roaring waves is a comforting white noise lulling him in and making him sleepy.

The rocky cliffs ahead loom large, and Thor thinks of Steven Rogers' shield: blasting away danger and keeping his friend safe. The mountains block out the terror of what his people have gone through, and Thor wishes to bow his head to them as he would have to the Norns, and pray for their protection.

It's absolutely beautiful.

The silence is comfortable, and the sunlight and fresh air are so welcome that Thor loses nearly twenty minutes just to breathing in the sights and sounds of planet Earth.

Loki's eyes are cast down when Thor turns to his brother, and he itches to reach out and tip his brother's chin up so he might enjoy the sunshine.

"I'm going to buy curtains," Thor says, facing forward again.

"What?"

"For our bedroom," Thor clarifies. "We'll get deeper sleep without the sunlight waking us up so early."

Loki nods and says nothing.

Just as Thor opens his mouth again his brother cuts in.

"I'm going to choose the design and color."

Not a request, nor a question: a statement. This is fine, as allowing Loki to play interior decorator is Thor's plan, but his brother's boldness makes him smile.

"What color would you like?"

"Something dark."

Thor nods, acknowledging. "I think red would be best."

With Loki on his right, Thor has no peripheral vision to see his brother but he can _feel_ the look he's receiving.

"We are _not_ getting red."

In a perfectly respectable attempt to control his amusement, Thor presses on. "It's a bold color; strong, regal. In fact, I think our bedding should be red as well. Or possibly silver. Maybe both."

Perhaps Loki realizes that Thor can't see him glaring and that's what prompts him to shove his brother instead, but when Thor catches his balance and turns his laughter to his sibling he sees Loki trying not to grin.

"What's that? You want a headboard carved with feathers?" Thor asks, holding up his arms to guard his face as Loki attacks him again.

"Can we at least agree on a 'no girls allowed' sign for the door?" he calls over his shoulder as he runs away laughing.

Loki chases him all the way to the sand before they stop to catch their breath.

It's difficult to run in these jeans, and the soles of his bare feet are unhappy from smacking so vigorously against the ground, but he hasn't played like this with Loki in what feels like a lifetime and doesn't notice anything else.

"Let's go for a swim," Thor says, already tugging off his shirt.

He is unsurprised to see Loki shake his head. "I can't go in one of _Earth's _oceans until I obtain a better hair conditioner."

Thor tugs off his pants and raises an eyebrow at his brother. "You don't wash your hair for eight years and now you're worried about sea water?"

Loki throws sand at him as Thor runs away to hide in the waves.

When the water is halfway up his shins, Thor dives forward to throw himself under.

It's freezing, and so so welcome. His head bursts through the surface and Thor shakes his hair and tilts his head to the side so water that slipped in under his eyepatch can get out.

As he kicks his legs to turn around and see how far Loki chased him, Thor feels something large and sandpapery move against his leg.

Such a feeling in the ocean would be frightening for someone unrelated to a shapeshifter. When he glances at the shore and sees no one, he grins at the confirmation and waits to see what type of shark his brother has become.

When a small, oddly shaped fin appears above the water, Thor squints his eye and tries to recognize it.

_Too small for a blue or a salmon_…

As the creature smacks into his chest with a horn extending past its face Thor bursts into laughter.

"This is a good look for you, brother," he says as the goblin shark opens its mouth to bite him, unsure of whether Loki can hear him under the water.

Loki shifts to a jellyfish when Thor reaches out and squeezes his fin.

"You know on Earth people may make assumptions about you for choosing to associate with tentacles."

His brother definitely heard that because, and Thor isn't sure how he knows this, but that jellyfish is giving him a look.

Finally Loki shifts into a little stingray and skims closer to the bottom of the ocean floor, to be away from the disruption of the waves above.

The water is clear enough that Thor can periodically look down and spy his sibling gliding along, gracefully flapping his tiny wings.

Thor is envious of his brother's abilities, and wonders what Loki can see down there.

He'll have to ask his brother to tell him, perhaps as a bedtime story.

Diving, floating, and body surfing the waves makes the last of the daylight slip away quickly, and by the time Thor can no longer deny that dusk is upon them it must be after eight p.m. and his belly is growling.

Unsure of how to get Loki's attention, Thor swims for the shore and watches to see if his brother will follow.

By the time he reaches dry sand, the lovely little stingray has changed back into a very wet Loki.

Thor doubles over laughing at the sour expression on his brother's beautiful face.

"Why didn't you take your clothes off first?" he pants as Loki tries to pull the fabric away from his skin. Thor's underwear is clinging to him most unpleasantly and he imagines Loki must feel worse.

"There wasn't time," Loki answers.

"You mean it was more important to surprise me with a shark attack than to keep your only set of clothes dry?"

Loki looks up at him and scowls.

"Turn around," he says after another ten seconds of holding his shirt away from his skin.

Thor pauses drying his legs off with his shirt, as he reasons he can walk back in just his pants and wash his shirt tonight. "Why?"

"I'm going to take these off so _turn around_."

Respectfully, Thor complies and sets his back to his brother so Loki can strip in privacy. He hears a disgusted "eugh!" and wishes he could take a peak.

Once Thor finishes drying himself and struggles to get his pants on, for jeans to _not_ want to pull over damp skin he calls out to his brother.

"Do you plan to walk home naked?"

Thor feels tiny feet alight on his shoulder and turns to see a petite flecked sandpiper.

"The world may not be able to tell, but I know you're a naked bird, brother," Thor teases as he reaches up a finger to the bird's mouth.

The bird clips him with a tiny beak and Thor tosses his shirt over his opposite shoulder.

"There's a sandwich Stark told me about, it's called a 'grilled cheese'. It sounds very simple to make," Thor says to his brother as he begins to walk home, for the little bird is still on his shoulder.

"You butter the outside of the bread, put the buttered side down onto the pan, place your cheese on top, and then cover it with another slice. Then you flip it periodically while the cheese melts."

His stomach growls loudly at his monologue.

"I can make that, and it will give us a chance to see what kind of cheeses there are on Earth. There was a tremendous selection at the store, and I let Tony choose what he thought we would like best."

The sunset in front of them is stunning. Thor grins knowing that his brother is facing it too.

"He said it tastes best if it's dipped in tomato soup, which I'm told is exactly what it sounds like. I know you don't care for tomatoes, but these pureed so finely you won't have that texture you dislike. It comes in a can, so it's easy to heat up, and then perhaps we can have a salad."

Loki's little beak nips at Thor's earlobe and Thor laughs and swats at the offender.

"Vegetables are good for you, Loki."

Thor feels another nip at his ear and then the little feet disappear as his brother spreads his wings and flies alongside him.

The gorgeous pinks and blues that decorate the sky and cast alluring rays and shadows over the world below are tempting, but Thor only has an eye for his brother.

oooooo


	7. A Knowing Grin

oooooo

Thor won't stop trying to get him to eat.

Every morning Loki wakes to the smell of coffee, which Thor claims has improved radically in taste since he first prepared it, and by the time Loki dresses and washes his face Thor has laid out a breakfast spread for them.

Eggs, bacon, toast, fruit, coffee - it's too much. Loki has never been one to gorge in the mornings and continues to make his tea and trick Thor into eating his food.

Lunch goes the same way.

Simple sandwiches are quick and easy, and though Loki prefers to spend their free hour tracing runes on the inside of the house, Thor always makes a plate for him.

It is harder to resist dinner, as work is draining in a way Loki did not expect.

But _it's too much_.

Thor's kindness is eating Loki alive.

It's a tightrope act of wanting his brother's love, attention, and approval so badly he can't breathe, and needing to have his walls so firmly up and reinforced that he keeps Thor detached and uncertain, but Loki is used to this walk and has lived it for centuries.

His brother is a ray of sunshine. Thor loves freely and easily, and Loki does not want to be swept up in the riptide of Thor's general cheeriness. He does not want to be forgiven just because it is not in Thor's nature to hold a grudge.

Loki wants to be the _exception_. He wants Thor to love him so much that he cannot help but forgive and protect and care for him.

But when Thor says things like 'I won't lose you again' or 'do you truly not know how much I love you?' Loki is terrified and pulls away even further.

Thor cannot win.

Loki won't let him. In order for Thor to truly see Loki for who he is and give his brother what he wants, Loki would have to admit to the wanting, and he can't do that. He has already lost so much; so much love, so much time, so many opportunities.

If Thor finds out that Loki is in love with him, he will lose Thor forever too.

So he stays prickly and guarded. He shifts into a snake before falling asleep so he doesn't risk bumping into his brother's lovely muscles in the night and there's no chance of Thor rolling over and seeing his little brother with an erection.

Not that Loki is likely to get one, as grief has a crucifying effect on one's sex drive, and terror makes it worse. The closest he's come to feeling any kind of blood flowing in between his legs was seeing his brother's wet underwear clinging to his cock at the beach.

The heaviness of gloom is overwhelming.

He is not unfamiliar to it, and has lived without finding joy in things for so long Loki assumes that it's just part of his personality now. To feel bereft, hopeless, dejected, and worthless are all things Loki has had centuries to familiarize himself with.

This is something different.

And then perhaps it's not? Maybe this is the same storm cloud that's sat over Loki's head for most of his life and it's just darker now. If he tries to trace back to a moment when his candle blew out completely, Loki can't. It would be re-lit, occasionally, by his stupid beautiful brother, only with a shorter wick, and then disappear again in a puff of smoke leaving Loki wondering if he had ever really felt the will to live at all.

If there was another Bifrost to throw himself off of, Loki thinks he would.

He wants so badly to believe that Thor means it when he says that losing him again would cause more pain than what Loki's staying is surely inflicting upon him.

They're all they have left.

Except Heimdall. And Thor's Midgardian friends. And everyone and everything else on this planet that undoubtedly loves the blonde oaf.

Really, he is all Loki has left, and Loki only believes in himself having any piece of Thor less than five percent of the time.

The meals, the promises, the affection - Loki assumes it's coming from guilt. Either Thor feels badly that he's playing a long con to get Loki to trust him and feel safe and then that's when he will strike and either take Loki down himself or hand him over to whoever promises to do the most damage, or Thor merely feels familial duty born out of some obligation to honor their mother's memory.

It _cannot_ come from a place of loving Loki.

He's fucked up too much. There are some things that cannot be forgiven, and Thor doesn't even know all of Loki's sins.

And yet, when he thinks about leaving - taking the Tesseract and either drowning himself on some abandoned moon or trying to blend in somewhere completely off the radar like Sakaar, Loki is stopped by two things:

This horrible little hope of his that Thor will properly love him again, though Loki himself isn't even sure what that would entail - and fear.

The Chitauri were not supposed to be on the other end of the wormhole.

Thanos was not supposed to catch Loki at his lowest - he never meant to land.

He's completely terrified of what will be waiting for him out in space, and exactly how alone he will be without his brother.

Loki can't sleep in the dark, anymore.

Even in the cells on Asgard where he spent a year in prison, it was customary to turn the lights off when it was time to sleep as Odin didn't want to make the prisoners mad to the point of useless should he ever find use for them.

Loki had to quietly ask his mother to keep his lights on. He would rather people see into his cell than hear him screaming from a nightmare, and he could always cast a glamour to hide _himself_.

The years he spent in his father's image included so many sleepless nights or surrounding himself with torches it was a wonder Loki's body hadn't expired merely from exhaustion.

On the Statesman it was impossible to find rest, knowing that they were so exposed in that vast expanse of blackness.

But here...

It does help to have Thor near, though Loki won't tell him that, as he believes it's less likely that someone or something will successfully snatch him out of bed when his brother is right there with the power to zap them away. Even if Thor won't lose Loki out of nothing more than pride, that should be enough to spare him from the Mad Titan's tortures again.

Even with Thor asleep in the bed, all bulky and possessive, Loki does his best to pass the nighttime hours with productivity, which at this time is just a lot of rune tracing.

His magic is not yet restored to its proper full strength. Sleep, and likely eating, make a huge difference as magic does draw from energy and right now Loki has none, but he's scared and guilty and even though he's often too ashamed to accept his brother's kindness and cooking, he's too sad and apathetic about his own welfare to just take care of himself.

He has consumed so much tea in the last week he may as well turn into a leaf.

Earth has words for this: "depression" "anxiety" and "post traumatic stress disorder" and frankly they piss Loki off. He doesn't want a diagnosis. No one on Earth can fathom what he and Thor have been through. There is no single word that captures what he is feeling and what trauma has done to him on a cellular level. And he is entirely uninterested in opening up to a _professional _about his experiences or how they impact him now. Loki knows that information can be sold or shared to enemies, and he is not going to open himself up to that. And medication? Drugs? What, so someone clever and wicked can poison him or control his mind?

Absolutely not.

He is over a thousand years old, he will handle this.

That he has tried to kill himself once before is something Loki ignores.

At the end of their first week of work, Loki is so tired he nearly falls asleep at his and Thor's makeshift desk when a particularly exasperating problem forces him to hide his face in his hands.

"One more hour, little brother," Thor soothes, nudging him under the table in the way he has become comfortable doing.

"What's to stop me from pretending to do work and clicking that button at the appropriate time?" Loki asks, rubbing his eyes and reconsidering his plan to flee to a realm with no concept of 'back office order support'.

"We are lucky to have these jobs, Loki. Do not do anything that will make Stark reconsider his generosity to our people," Thor answers.

Loki's voice is muffled against his palms. "If you believe he's willing to punish others for my actions then you had better stop trusting him now."

Thor stays silent, and Loki wonders if his brother is rethinking keeping him there.

"It's one more hour, Loki," Thor finally says.

And Loki sighs, but goes back to work.

oooooo

They have gone out for a walk every night this week. Loki stayed out of the ocean after Monday, with such limited options for washing his clothes and not enough magic reserved to deal with it the way he used to, but their walks took them to the water anyway.

Thor liked to strip and swim for a bit, though not as long as their first day, while Loki rolled up his too large pants and stood at the shore as the waves lapped at his ankles.

He liked to stare out over the water and pretend that they were still on Asgard and as close as two brothers could be.

As Thor closes his laptop, he sighs heavily and cracks his neck.

"Forty hours done, and soon we will be paid handsomely," he says to Loki.

_Handsomely_.

Loki has no idea what to expect from their paychecks, as he has not gone shopping on Earth to make sense of how far their money will stretch, but he doubts very much that they will receive enough to accommodate his tastes.

When his own computer clicks shut, Loki stands and stretches.

Though he is appalled by the idea of spending their funds on anything relating to this job, he will either have to replace this chair altogether or purchase a sturdy cushion for his bottom. Forty hours a week is already hurting his poorly padded bones.

"I'm going to use the restroom, and then we can go on our walk," Thor says, pausing before he walks away so Loki can confirm his wish.

Though he bristles at the expectation of tradition, he wants to stretch his legs.

He nods once, avoiding eye contact, and waits until the bathroom door closes before releasing tears he didn't realize were desperate to come out.

A delightful litany of abuse plays on repeat in Loki's head until Thor returns, at which point Loki hastily wipes his eyes and tugs his shoes on.

Those are also on his list to purchase. A chair cushion, nice shoes, and _books_.

The ultimate escape from the horrors of his own thoughts, Loki is desperate for something to read.

Thor continues to bring up what they might purchase when they get paid the following week, but Loki remains tight lipped about everything except demanding to be the one to decorate their new home.

But he wants literature, and at this point _anything_ is welcome.

He is _not_ going to ask Stark for recommendations, as Thor continues to do so freely for everything else, and asking Bruce might lead to an indirect request to Stark. But Natasha had offered a jumping off point.

Some of Earth's classics were available on Asgard, and Loki was not completely without guideposts, but he does not know what to expect from their shopping.

The brothers walk in silence.

Fortunately, for Loki anyway, they have yet to run into anyone else on these outings so far. Thor makes a point to be available, and has told everyone that while he will personally check in on the weekends they are also free to seek him out at home should a need arise that cannot wait until Saturday.

Loki is expected to assist his brother with anything the people require, but he does not want to have any conversations about it. He knows what the Asgardians think of him.

_Liar, sneak, a stain on the house of Odin._

Even the ones who don't openly regard him with contempt must be thinking it, Loki is certain.

When they reach sand, Loki tugs off his shoes and expects Thor to strip as usual.

Instead, Thor walks until he's ten feet from the water and sits down.

Loki stares at his brother's back and aches to wrap himself around it. When Thor looks back over his shoulder and raises an expectant eyebrow as though he is waiting for Loki to join him, Loki's heart clenches in his chest.

"I don't want to get my only pair of pants covered in sand," Loki says as he comes to stand besides his brother.

"We can wash them tonight," Thor offers, leaning back on his elbows and getting even dirtier.

"I don't want to spend my evening doing laundry," Loki replies, testing.

Thor grins, seeing his bait for what it is, and closes his eye. "I will wash your clothes, Loki."

He doesn't answer Thor, but does sit down beside him.

The waves are a lovely soundtrack that play just loudly enough to tune out the vicious voice in the back of Loki's head that tells him he's a selfish horrible monster for allowing Thor to perform chores for him.

"The sun feels good," Thor murmurs as he lies down completely.

With his eye still shut, Loki is free to gaze at his brother unnoticed.

No amount of exhaustion or life slicing away at his brother can dull Thor's handsomeness.

It's completely infuriating, but Loki is maddeningly smitten with his brother.

His stupid strong jaw, his thick sturdy neck, his broad arms, his sweet smile, his gorgeous voice, his earnestness and horrible optimistic spirit ever present and insistent despite everything - _god_ is the only word for Thor.

That such a moniker could also belong to Loki seems like a mistake.

And yet if anyone were to suggest such a thing, Loki would be offended and violent.

Thor raises his arms above his head to cradle his neck, and Loki can't help but admire how it's left his side perfectly available for someone to curl up against.

But Loki would rather spent the rest of the year in wet jeans than risk the vulnerability of asking for snuggles from his brother.

He settles for admiring with his eyes until he's so overwhelmed with love it loops back to heartbreak and he has to direct his gaze back to the sea so his tears won't be spotted.

At least his weeping has a nice view.

The fourth time Loki wipes his eyes, he feels a hand rub the small of his back and turns to see Thor looking at him.

It's awkward to jerk away on sand, so Loki swats at his brother instead.

"Stop it," is all he can manage without his voice cracking, and Loki doesn't want Thor to see him go to pieces again like he had with the chicken.

Thor listens without protest, and returns his hand behind his head.

It's good that Thor is respectful of his boundaries, and Loki is too tired to argue, but his body mourns the loss of Thor's simple affection when the contact is broken.

Even Loki doesn't know what he wants.

"What's your favorite thing we've eaten so far?" Thor asks, a few minutes later.

Compared to Thor, Loki's list is smaller since he does not partake in every meal, but a distraction is welcome.

"The cheese sandwich," Loki answers, wiping his eyes for what he is determined to make the final time.

"Ooh," Thor moans. "Grilled cheese, that was good."

Loki dislikes being corrected, but withholds any punitive poking. The grilled cheese was exceptionally tasty, though it had given him a stomachache. Loki reasoned that since it was the most he had eaten of any meal thus far, his stomach was just adjusting to the quantity.

"I can make that again tonight."

_Offer to help him._

_Tell him to stop forcing food down your throat._

_Tell him you're thankful for everything he's doing._

_Stab him and fling yourself into the ocean._

"Okay," is what he settles on, and it leaves him even lower.

"Let's head back then," Thor says, either extraordinarily patient with how horrible and ungrateful his brother is, or hungry enough to not notice.

Either one is likely, and Loki can't decide which he deserves.

Thor brushes the sand off of his back and ass as best he can and then wipes his hands on his thighs. It defeats the purpose, and Thor seems to recognize this as he chuckles at himself and then looks up at Loki with his smile still there.

He's unworthy of such a gift, and has to look away.

oooooo

Loki can't wait until bedtime to shower, and decides to spare himself the torment of wondering whether or not to help Thor in the kitchen by excusing himself to the bathroom.

There is already a criminal amount of sand on the floor in the space, and Loki sighs as he mulls over using just a _smidge_ of magic to tidy.

It's not worth it, though. If he needs to make a quick escape then he will need every bit he currently has.

With his back to the mirror, Loki strips off his clothes and grimaces at how stale they feel.

Jeans are _horrible_.

He keeps his eyes down as he places the garments in the sink, hoping to mitigate the spread of sand.

A bath sounds nice, but he has to shower first to get the little granules off of his hands, feet, and somehow, inexplicably, the rest of him.

Better soaps and hair care are also on Loki's shopping list.

Shampooing has restored bounce and volume to his curls that he normally likes to slick back and hide, but he hasn't had the proper product to do so in a controlled way and it felt too good to be clean to let himself accumulate grease the way he had before.

So he walks around looking like a damned fool with curls.

Thor likes them. Or at least he used to, and it's the least amount of effort Loki can risk to give his brother some kind of reminder of the relationship they used to have.

The body wash he's sharing with Thor is making his skin dry, but without anything else to take its place Loki hastily lathers himself with it and rinses away the grime.

His arms and legs have lost muscle definition, and Loki can feel his ribs prominently when his thin fingers slide over his front.

Armor hid it before, but with these too large clothes Loki feels like a child when he catches his reflection. The clothes might as well be intended for Thor and Loki is just wearing them trying to look like his big brother.

It's humiliating.

Loki keeps his eyes forward on the shower wall in front of him as his hands quickly slip between his legs.

This has become his least favorite part of bathing.

When Odin died, Loki felt an immediate change in his body that he assumed was related to grief and shock. Things moved so quickly after that, with Hela and being spit out onto Sakaar, Loki didn't realize what had changed exactly until he felt a horrible pain in his lower belly.

Fortunately, he realized what was causing the ache before he got blood on anything.

_Jotun physiology_ he told himself.

It would be easy enough to shift into the shape of a 'boy', but that also took energy even if it was more instinctive and did not pull from the same stores that his magic did.

And Loki wasn't sure what would happen to the blood if he blocked its means of escape.

Two weeks in total, and hiding it from the Grandmaster was a challenge in itself, but the bleeding had stopped and Loki still had this body.

He refused to look at it in the mirror or allow his fingers to linger in the bath. Textbooks and life had taught him what the two plump lips meant, what they concealed.

There is no need to acknowledge it with his eyes.

When the last of the sand slips down the drain Loki reaches for the stopper so that the bath can fill, and then hesitates.

Thor is likely waiting for him to come back out so they can eat together.

And the sandwich does appeal to him.

He turns the water off and towels himself dry.

With his pajamas on, Loki walks out of the bathroom and scowls when he sees the Valkyrie sitting at their dining room table next to Thor. The knowing grin on her face when she spies Loki would ordinarily make him want to blind her, but he's distracted by his brother blushing.

"What are you doing here?" Loki asks.

"Just came to celebrate Thor's first week of work with a drink," she answers as she smacks Thor's back and shakes his shoulder jovially.

There are indeed beers on the table beside plates with grilled cheeses.

Loki eyes her suspiciously as he walks into the kitchen to make his tea. He already isn't thrilled to be having dinner in sleepwear, and he's doubly enraged that she's seeing him in such a dressed down state.

"There's a beer here for you," Valkyrie calls out to Loki as she raises her own bottle.

Though Loki drank quite a bit while hiding as Odin and during his time on Sakaar, he dislikes beer. The taste is unpleasant, it usually leaves him uncomfortably full before he notices any inebriation, and whatever the humans have managed to brew is not likely to be nearly as strong as what he and Thor are used to.

He's also not overly fond of the idea of drunkenly saying something to Thor that he can't take back and digging himself further into a pit of self-loathing.

Loki drags out his time in the kitchen, hoping the Valkyrie will finish her beverage and leave before his tea is finished.

She's saying something to Thor that's making him blush more deeply, and Loki nearly smashes his mug on the floor.

_If she is flirting with him, so help me god_ -

And to make Thor blush? His brother? The God of Thunder? _**How dare she**_.

The grilled cheese no longer sounds enticing and Loki's torn between the desire to scream at the two of them or to turn into a beetle and hide while he scuttles far away from here. Or perhaps a dragon so that he might burn everything down as he goes…

"Quit stalling with your tea and come eat the food your loving brother made you," Valkyrie calls out again.

Loki glares at her and moves deliberately, comically slowly as he unwraps the tea bag and maintains eye contact.

"Are you sure?" Valkyrie asks Thor, this time just loud enough for Loki to hear.

Thor doesn't answer, but picks up the beer next to his plate and drains the bottle.

_She's asking about you. Is he sure about you. And he's not - that's why he didn't say anything he has to drink just to deal with the thought of you -_

"Have you messed with this at all?" Valkyrie presses on, uncaring or unaware of the brothers' discomfort, as she pulls out her phone. "There's this feature…"

She presses something and suddenly loud music erupts from the tiny device.

"You can choose what kind too," she continues as she hits something else and the sound changes from loud yelling to a smooth piano and a soft voice. "We got those little ear pieces that came with the phone, you can plug them in and listen to whatever you want."

The brothers have _not_ played with their phones, and they might be dead for all Loki knows, but Thor appears interested.

"Let me grab mine," he says before standing and heading toward the hallway, likely retrieving the device from their bedroom.

Loki watches his brother walk away, and when he turns his head to face forward he sees the Valkyrie giving him that same knowing grin.

"Are you afraid of me or something?"

She's clearly goading him, Loki is smart enough to know that, but he's also indignant enough to play into it and walks his tea over the table.

He tries to look haughty and unaffected by her presence, but she's looking at him the same way Natasha had - it is _entirely_ too familiar.

"What?" he asks in a dry tone with no upward inflection.

The Valkyrie shrugs one shoulder and lifts her bottle to her lips. "You're not as difficult to read as you want to be."

If Thor had not reentered the room at that precise moment, Loki would have thrown his tea in her face.

He is still considering it when Thor takes a seat beside him.

"Okay, which picture is it?" he asks, oblivious to Loki's fury as he holds up his phone for the Valkyrie to demonstrate how to navigate the music for him.

She walks Thor through the steps while Loki sips his tea and chews on the inside of his lip.

"Are you not going to drink that?" she asks, nodding to Loki's beer.

"No."

Without asking, she reaches over and plucks it from beside his still full plate. "No sense in wasting good drink," she murmurs. "Hey, cheers to your first week, too," she adds, raising the bottle to Loki.

That's enough.

Loki stands up and walks his mug back to the kitchen without a word.

"I'm going to bed," he calls once the cup is rinsed.

"You didn't eat your sandwich," Thor says, sounding wounded.

_Feed it to your little girlfriend_.

"I'm not hungry," Loki replies as he walks to the bedroom without looking back.

oooooo

Loki is still awake when Thor comes to bed. Possibly because it was a matter of minutes after Loki dismissed himself, or because it looks extra dark outside and it's making Loki fidgety.

Thor closes the bedroom door behind him and Loki pointedly stares at the wall while he traces runes.

It's practical as much as distracting, and Loki prays these protections will reinforce their space enough to keep them safe until his magic is returned to full strength.

"She's gone, if you want to have your sandwich," Thor says.

Loki doesn't turn around.

"I'm surprised you didn't give it to her."

Thor is tugging off his sandy clothes and pauses to look at his brother.

"What?"

_Fuck you, Thor_.

"You two were getting so _cozy_ -"

Thor's heavy sigh interrupts him, and when Loki looks at his brother Thor has his eye closed and his head dropped back in exasperation.

"Loki, shut up."

For a moment, Loki nearly forgets that he's meant to be conserving his magic and his fingers twitch to summon his daggers.

He needs to throw _something _at Thor.

"What? Are you going to pretend -"

"Loki, just shh," Thor says firmly as he resumes undressing. "There is nothing romantic between the Valkyrie and me, and I made that sandwich for you. I'm going to take a shower, so if you want it then go eat it."

Thor walks out of the room with his clothes in his hands, leaving Loki standing there feeling foolish and embarrassed.

Loki hates to feel foolish and embarrassed.

He finishes the rune he was in the middle of tracing as his heart beats frantically, and then he walks out into the empty dining area to eat the meal his brother made for him.

oooooo

"Do you want to sleep in, tomorrow?" Thor asks as he gets into bed, fresh from his shower and wearing his pajama bottoms.

Loki holds his stomach, regretting the choice to eat, and glances out the window at the tormenting inky black.

If he's able, Loki intends to sleep with as much sunlight to protect him as possible.

"Perhaps."

Thor frowns at him. "Are you feeling unwell?"

"Why?" Loki replies, offended at the implication that anything about his person reads as ill.

"You're all clenched and grimacing," Thor answers without any hint of judgement.

Loki tries to will himself to relax and force his stomach to behave. "I'm fine. Sitting at that desk all week was uncomfortable," he deflects, and it's not entirely untrue.

"Do you want me to rub your shoulders?"

And Loki _does_ want Thor to rub his shoulders. He's a prince and in love with his brother, of course he wants Thor to touch him and help him relax.

But he's furious that his brother is even offering.

"I'm not a child, Thor," he says as he rolls onto his side to face away from his brother.

"I didn't say you were, Loki."

"Stop being nice to me!"

The words are out before Loki can even attempt to swallow them.

He feels the bed shift as Thor sits up behind him.

"What?"

And Thor sounds so genuinely confused and he's just offered to do something kind and _Loki's stomach hurts_.

Tears glide out from his eyes so suddenly and forcefully it's as though they have been waiting in reserves instead of leaking out of him at every opportunity. He opens his mouth to answer but only manages a shaky inhale.

"Loki, I'm just trying to take care of you -" Thor starts as he places a cautious hand on Loki's shoulder.

It's too much - the contact is too much. If Thor touches him he's going to see into him and Loki's going to unravel even further. Loki jerks his shoulder to dislodge the touch and his stomach punishes him for the movement. "Well stop! I don't need or want your pity."

"It's not pity."

And Loki may have known that at one point, or perhaps just been foolish enough to believe it. But now? Everything about him is pitiful. His stupid curls and no magic and a stomach that can't even handle cheese - and he yelled at Thor about talking too much to a girl again!

"I'm not just one of your subjects," Loki starts, regretting starting a fight he has no idea how to finish without lying about why he's upset in the first place.

"You think I would rub just anyone's shoulders?"

_Yes._

"Wouldn't you?"

Thor returns his hand, this time to Loki's arm, and he gives the thin limb a firm squeeze.

"I might but I wouldn't want to. _You_ are my brother."

It's a coin toss between which word has affected Loki more deeply: you or brother.

That should thrill him. It's what Loki wants: to be special, to be the exception, to be _wanted_ by his beautiful brother.

But these are hours when his worth is not in line with his wants, and he feels so small and horrible that every outpouring of love from Thor is a barb.

"I can take care of myself, Thor," Loki says quietly, knowing if he raises his voice any higher it will crack. He wants to go splash water on his face and have a proper cry in the privacy of the bathroom where it's less humiliating, but when Loki starts to sit up to get out of bed Thor tightens his grip on his brother's arm.

"I don't know what to do."

_Love me and only me and give me endless patience while I change my mind about what I need every ten minutes._

This fucking stomachache is either compounded by what the rest of his body and brain are feeling, or it's terribly timed. Either way, Loki doesn't fight against Thor's grip and lies down once more.

"I don't either," Loki whispers back.

The brothers look at each other and Thor squeezes him again.

"We should talk about this."

Not for the first time, Loki shoots down this request.

"Not tonight, Thor," he say, and then upon seeing Thor's devastated expression adds, "Please."

If it's the politeness that makes Thor acquiesce and not that Loki is still crying, then great. Whatever works.

"Okay, Loki," Thor says as he withdraws his hand.

The silence between them is heavy, and Loki rolls back onto his side to clutch his stomach and cry onto his pillow.

At some point he must have dozed off because when a bird outside caws loudly Loki jerks awake and sits up a little, dislodging the blanket.

It's early enough that the light coming in is still gray and not yet blue.

Loki silently curses the bird and closes his eyes to try and get back to sleep before his brain realizes he's awake and the cause is lost entirely. His shoulder is chilly where the blanket has slipped off, but Loki knows if he moves he won't be able to chase sleep down.

He hears the blankets shift and feels Thor tug them up and over him. That warm loving hand lingers on his shoulder and then slides down his back before retreating.

Thor wants him to be warm.

Loki was so difficult last night and Thor wants him to be warm.

This time, Loki falls asleep with a smile on his face and dreams of his brother.

oooooo


	8. Cast In Gold

oooooo

"This is beginning to look respectable. I think even our mother would be proud."

Thor wipes his hands on his jeans, unconcerned with dirtying them now that the town boasts a small laundromat with devices to wash and dry clothes. The planter boxes before him took several hours to properly assemble, and are now joyfully stuffed with soil and seeds.

A vegetable garden is a welcome physical distraction for Thor. It enables him to gear his brain to task-oriented work that will ultimately serve his home and provide for Loki. Though his brother made faces at every vegetable seed Thor picked up, he knows Loki will go to town on potatoes and herbs once they are harvested.

It's the end of June, and the sun has spent the better part of the morning flirting with Thor's back and neck. Still delighted by the freedom of moving without clothes, Thor preferred to work shirtless, as he was in his own backyard and covered in dirt anyway.

"I can expand over there," Thor says as he gestures to a spot of sunny grass. "We could have beans and peas, anything you'd like."

Loki, who has spent the morning hiding in the shade on a blanket with a library book in his hands, turns a page and only briefly raises an eyebrow at his brother.

"I don't care for vegetables, Thor. You know this."

"You'll like them when they're cooked with all the new herbs and spices," Thor says, hovering his face a few inches above the soil and inhaling deeply as though the seeds below will give off the aroma he knows they'll sprout.

"You're going to make your face filthy," Loki murmurs with his nose in his book.

"Lucky for me there's more than a few skincare products in my bathroom now. Maybe I'll just dip into those," Thor replies with a grin, still hovering over the planter, but with his face turned to his sibling so Loki can see his amusement.

"If you touch my things I'll turn you into a salamander and make you sleep outside."

Thor looks over at his gorgeous brother, and takes advantage of this opportunity for unnoticed spying to run his eye over the way Loki's new pants and sweater fit him so well and lend their cuts to the sharp lines of Loki's long body. His brother is the only person Thor knows who wears dress slacks and an expensive sweater to sit outside and read a book, but Thor isn't going to say anything. Loki is happier wearing clothes he feels proud in, and Thor likes admiring this handsome man he has a crush on.

It tickled Thor to no end this morning when he asked Loki to join him for the gardening and Loki grabbed a blanket, another new purchase, and followed.

They are three paychecks deep now, and Santa Claus Tony has provided more than just checks for hours worked. The town's various community and municipal buildings have built up in recent weeks and a semblance of structure and familiarity is beginning to bloom.

Korg and Meik love the new television and gaming system, which every home can now boast as well per Thor's wish not to have anything his people do not also have, and even Thor finds himself drawn to the device and its controller when he sees how much fun his roommates have with it.

He and Loki still take their walks after work, but this last week they were much shorter as there was more to do at home. With a more thoroughly stocked kitchen, Thor has greatly enjoyed spending additional time with his phone open to a recipe page and a cornucopia of ingredients before him.

Loki continues to eat so little that Thor feels gluttonous everyday when he polishes off his brother's meals and sees no sense in turning things into leftovers when they're hot and delicious now. He can always make something else later.

Heimdall has started joining them for dinner, and Val came over again on Friday. It gives Thor so much calm to cook meals for this extended family and feel like he has a specific purpose. He and Loki return from their walks, Thor cracks open a beer, Loki has wine, and though Asgardians have never needed a reason to partake in drink, Thor tells himself that they're blowing off steam after a long day of work.

When he's onto his second or third beer, he says it's because their negligible alcohol content and effect on his inhuman body makes it easy for him to go through them quickly and he merely enjoys having something to drink while he prepares food.

Once Heimdall comes downstairs and joins and Thor is clinking his seventh or eighth glass against the gatekeeper's, he is simply having a drink with a friend and there's nothing worrying about that.

That this cloying sense of guilt, grief, and feeling like a disappointment are ever present for Thor and the buzz of the beer mixed with the fulfilment that feeding his loved ones gives him is a distraction from acknowledging or dealing with these looming feelings is not something Thor allows himself to worry about.

He is a king now, and has no time for himself anymore. If he falls to pieces, these people will suffer. Loki will suffer - and Thor will not allow that.

Today, though, with a bright blue sky, sweat of labor from building the planter boxes and then tucking little seeds into soil, and hours of easy banter with Loki by his side, Thor feels great. It's the lightest and happiest he has felt possibly since they arrived in New Asgard.

It's early in the afternoon, and with so many hours left in the day Thor feels proud for waking up early and getting all of this work in the backyard done right away. He feels almost giddy, and stands up to stretch his muscles that are already feeling the detriment of a desk job.

"What would you like to see out here?" Thor asks as he twists his torso to loosen the tightness in his back from all the bending over.

Loki has also spent the day hunched over his book, and Thor wonders if his brother will finally let him rub those bony shoulders later.

"A statue of me."

Thor's laugh makes Loki look up and smirk at him. He walks to his brother and sits beside him on the grass instead of the blanket, as his jeans are covered in dirt. They're close enough that Thor can knock Loki's shoulder and tease him.

"What will this statue look like?"

"A recreation of the one on Asgard," Loki answers nonchalantly as he pretends to read.

Thor nods, knowing his brother is amused and paying attention to his peripheral vision.

"That was indeed a splendid statue. Perhaps we should put it in the front yard, though, so everyone can see and enjoy it."

Loki pointedly turns another page and shrugs one shoulder. "If you feel that would be best,"

"We'll just have to make a few changes, for cost cutting purposes."

"Hm. Such as?"

Thor lies down and closes his eye as he folds his arms beneath his head. "You'll be naked, for starters."

He hears Loki's book slam shut and tries not to grin.

"How exactly would that cut costs?"

Thor looks at Loki like he's simple. "Clothes cost money, _Loki_."

It's banter, and Loki knows it, but he won't be outdone.

"Perhaps I'll dress it in your things."

"Or I could plant a lovely flower garden for you, with all your favorites. I could weave you a little loincloth of petals."

"I wouldn't enjoy that."

"Oh, I would."

The look Loki gives him says he doesn't know what to make of that, and that the trickster is torn between firing a taunt back and staying in this little game, or spying the truth of Thor's words.

Thor simply grins at his brother as though he thinks himself to be the funniest person around.

And Thor can pretend. He can hide behind the notion that he is simply a teasing older brother who thinks it would be funny to pretend to commission a grand statue befitting a royal only to make them naked and then cackle about it.

If he blushes then he reveals that he would actually love to see such a statue and would hope for it to have an erection that Thor might fantasize about sucking, touching, or impaling himself on.

So he grins instead, and holds it until Loki softens and smacks him.

"Fool."

Thor lets out a silent sigh of relief when Loki turns back to his book, still appearing amused.

His secret is safe for another day.

oooooo

When the brothers go back inside, Korg and Meik are on a chair and the floor, respectively, playing a video game. Thor recognizes it as one he's joined for, and pauses to watch their progress while Loki goes to the kitchen.

"How did you make him jump like that?" Thor asks.

"Oh, it's a nifty little trick. You just push these buttons," Korg answers, holding up his controller to show Thor. "That's how you get out of that area with all the crates."

Thor needs to shower off the sweat and dirt, but he wants to play this game.

Loki comes to stand beside him and hands Thor a glass of water as he sips from one himself.

It's unexpected, and Thor is so touched by the gesture that his world immediately narrows into him, Loki, this symbolic gesture of love in the form of H2O, his desire to cup his brother's neck, and nothing else.

"Thank you, Loki," he says. Loki is looking at the television screen, unaware of how close to tears Thor is, and says nothing.

Thor sips his water slowly, wishing to draw out the time he spends with his brother standing so close to him. It fingers grip the glass tighter to keep from questing out Loki's waist and pulling his brother flush against him. All of the sunshine from this morning must have cooked his brain, because Thor nearly feels as though the gesture could be welcome.

When the glasses are empty, Loki retreats to the bedroom to continue reading, and Thor slips into the bathroom to wash.

It's Saturday, and Thor plans to take all the dirty clothes in their home to what he is calling the community center, which now has three washing machines, three clothes dryers, and an ironing board and iron. There's a cabinet full of the proper soap and laundering accessories, and Thor thinks he will wash his and Loki's bedding as well so his brother can slip into clean, soft sheets tonight.

Though they haven't come to blows over sharing a bed, Thor does see that Loki still takes his time getting in. He reads in the living room, or takes his time in the bathroom, and Thor worries that it's deliberate as a means of limiting the time they spend beside each other under the sheets.

He knows Loki isn't sleeping, either. Sometimes Thor will steal a peek at his brother, and see Loki's eyes wide open and his fingers fidgeting with his hair or the edges of his pillowcase. More than once now, too, Thor has gently shaken Loki awake from what appeared to be a nightmare.

Since Thor gets them too, he understands when Loki clams up and rolls onto his other side to hide his face and refuses to talk about them. Thor doesn't want to burden Loki with the stressful dreams that plague him more nights than not, but he doesn't feel burdened by the thought of hearing about what's troubling Loki. His brother is a prideful, secretive being, and the rational part of Thor's brain knows not to take this personally, but the emotional reactive part of him wants to do more and wishes he could scoop his brother into a protective hold and physically bat away intrusive thoughts and unwelcome stress.

The dirty jeans crumple as Thor kicks them down and then strips off his underwear.

Though his muscles would enjoy the release that warm water provides, it's hot enough that Thor lets the water run a bit cold and lets out a happy refreshed sigh as it pours down from the showerhead and rushes the morning's work off of his back.

_A statue of Loki_.

Under no circumstances would Thor be erecting such a thing, for Loki's benefit more than anything else. He imagines that such a reminder of Loki's deception as king would enrage people, and Thor is pleased with how his brother currently seems to be regarded.

But it would be lovely.

Rather than the giant one Loki built for himself, Thor would prefer one to scale and identical to his brother in every way. He would pay extra for Loki's lips to be parted enough that Thor could kiss him and press his tongue inside the metal mouth. And instead of Loki's arms gesturing toward the sky, they could be cast to wrap perfectly around Thor's shoulders.

He pours soap into his heads and scrubs his arms as his mind hops onto this horny bound train.

Naked is the right call - as Loki's body has no business hiding underneath all the layers that usually drape it. Thor wants to be able to feel his brother's hip bones, and the small of his back, and his cock.

Thor opens his eye and glances at the door, double checking that it's securely shut, and then dives right back in.

He imagines Loki ordering him to show his loyalty and demonstrate his fealty by dropping to his knees and sucking on the golden erection. The real Loki could stand by his side, as a temptation - the true beauty Thor wants in his mouth - but he has to earn it first.

Between his legs, Thor's own prick stands up to hear more of this fantasy, and bobs against the chilly water droplets that bounce off of it.

Thor would suck until he choked, and then suck more, until the metal was nearly warm enough again to mold, and then stroke it while he looked into his brother's eyes and asked if this was how Loki liked to be touched. He wouldn't break away from their gaze as he thumbed the head of his brother's statue penis, and would wait until Loki was frustrated enough to beg Thor to please him properly.

With their last paycheck, Loki purchased silk pajamas in an opalescent sheer color that have been driving Thor wild. It doesn't entirely fit with the world he's creating in his mind, but he imagines Loki in these as he stands beside the statue, and Thor coming forward on his knees, gripping the pant's hem and tugging them down to his brother's bony ankles. Loki wouldn't be able to spread his legs well with the pants there, but Thor would lean in and kiss the inside of Loki's ankle, and drag his lips up the soft skin of his brother's leg until he got to the lush meat of his thigh.

Loki has always had delightfully curvy thighs, particularly for how slim the rest of his body is, and Thor has long fantasized about running his hands over those curves while his brother writhes on his lap.

His cock twitches aggressively and Thor reaches down to grip it, as though scolding it for it's misbehavior, and nearly keens at how good it feels. He's extremely worked up. As his mind continues this aroused fantasy, he strokes himself and tries to stay quiet.

Thor would drag his nails up the backs of Loki's legs and then squeeze his ass and spread his cheeks. Loki's cock would drip in front of his mouth, and beg to be licked clean while Loki panted and pouted above him. And Thor would want to tease but be unable to resist the way Loki smells and sounds, and he would swallow down that aching prick while the hands on Loki's ass pressed him forward and trapped him in Thor's greedy mouth.

The hand that isn't furiously stroking his own cock moves to the shower wall, bracing Thor and helping him stand as he loses himself in this fantasy.

He likes to imagine Loki moaning loudly, unable to help himself, telling Thor how good it feels and how badly he needs Thor. And Thor would give him everything he asked for and more. He'd slip a finger inside his brother's tight hole and fuck Loki with it as a taste for later.

No amount of caution or sense of propriety can prevent the groan Thor releases when he comes. The spray of the water swallows some of the sound, and thankfully it was quiet enough that it's unlikely anyone outside heard it, but the relief Thor feels at finally letting something out - he stands there panting for several minutes basking in this delicious moment for as long as he can.

Korg yells something at the game, and Meik squeaks loudly in response, and Thor smiles as he finishes up with his bathing.

With a towel draped around his hips, Thor walks into their bedroom and feels his heart clench at the sight of his brother lying on their bed reading his book. Loki is still wearing his nice clothes, but his shoes are by the front door and something about the outline of his toes in those socks makes Thor want to scream and squeeze Loki's cheeks.

"Good book?" he asks as he tugs open a dresser drawer.

"Good is a strong word," Loki answers.

Thor lets the towel drop to the floor as he pulls on fresh underwear.

"It looks like you're almost done with it. Do you have another one picked out to read next?"

Loki, without looking up from his book, possibly to avoid seeing a mostly naked Thor, nods.

"I was thinking of grilling tonight. Would you like that?" Thor asks as he tugs a shirt on, hurrying to be clothed if that is the thing keeping Loki from looking at him.

"Grilling what, exactly?"

Thor pulls shorts on and then picks up his towel. "We have chicken breasts and steak, and corn. I'm told it's excellent if you roll the cob in butter after it's been cooked."

Loki rolls onto his side, facing Thor, and the way it makes his curls fall forward is so unbelievably endearing.

"I suppose that sounds alright."

Thor resists the urge to toss the towel at his brother's head.

"Will you come read your book in the living room?"

Finally, his brother looks up at him. "Why?"

With what he hopes is a casual looking shrug, Thor says, "I'm enjoying spending time with you and I'm going to play this game with Korg and Meik."

Loki doesn't say anything, cruel or otherwise, and it must be Thor's birthday because Loki nods and sits up.

Thor pops into the bathroom to hang his towel up and then takes a seat on the couch.

"How do you feel about trying that dungeon again?" Korg asks as he hands Thor a controller.

He's trying very hard not to grin too blatantly at Loki sitting beside him, albeit tucked against the other end of the couch.

"Let's do it," he replies.

oooooo

The dungeon run took four attempts to complete, and by the time the raiding party gets through it Heimdall has already come downstairs, Val has come over, and Loki is two hundred pages into his second book.

The guardian and the Valkyrie have moved dining table chairs closer to the television to watch the game unfold, and though neither of them have ever played this before they have strong opinions on how best to complete this quest.

Loki has moved from sitting with his legs curled under him, somewhat facing the television, to resting with his back against the arm of the couch and his legs stretched out in front of him with his feet resting in Thor's lap. They don't obstruct his gameplay, and Thor is secretly thrilled that they're there. It's the most intimacy Loki has willingly offered since Thor can't even remember when, and it's making his heart beat hard.

He nearly throws the battle just so they can run through it again and he can prolong this contact.

But he won't do that to Korg and Meik...or the inexplicably invested Heimdall and Val.

"Well done," Heimdall says when the game screen displays victorious imagery.

"Time to celebrate with a feast," Val says as she raises her bottle of ale.

Though he is loath to stand, it is time to make food for the family. Thor tests the waters of what Loki will allow and places a hand on his brother's ankle, gripping it and then jovially shaking Loki's leg.

"Are you hungry?" he asks.

Loki closes his book and kicks at Thor.

_Playful_.

"Can you chop vegetables while I prepare the meat?" he asks as they rise from the couch.

"Yes, for a fee."

Korg goes outside to start the grill and Meik trails behind, squeaking about the game.

"I brought more chicken," Val says as she pulls out the grocery bag she came in with.

"Thank you, it looks like everyone should be well fed," Thor answers.

He and Heimdall transfer the raw meat onto several plates as Loki pushes the vegetable pieces he sliced up onto little wooden skewers, and then they carry the food outside.

"These look good. Well done," Heimdall says as he nods to the vegetable planters.

Thor feels a swell of pride and nods his thanks.

"You're welcome to everything back here. I'd like to expand the garden too."

"Is it all vegetables and herbs like you talked about?" Val asks before taking another swig of her drink.

"For now, yes. I think a fruit tree would be nice too. And some flowers for Loki," Thor says, shooting a grin at his brother and thrilling at how flustered it makes him.

Korg did his job well and the fire is lit and ready to cook.

"Watch your fingers," Heimdall cautions to Thor and Loki as they lay the chicken and vegetables onto the grill.

Loki bristles at being spoken to like a child, but Thor did very nearly burn his fingers and chooses to be grateful for the reminder.

"What have you got to sit on?" Val asks.

"Oh, we've got some nice woven blankets that have been lovely on the grass," Korg answers. "I'll get them."

Thor and Heimdall tend to the grill while Korg and Meik arrange a sitting area and grab plates and napkins for everyone. Val wheels out the cooler she brought, holding her chicken and a veritable treasure chest of booze, and props it open for everyone to partake.

Loki looks unsure of himself, like he doesn't know if he's welcome, and Thor makes a point to include his brother in conversation and continually asks for his help and opinions to ensure he stays near.

By the time the food is ready, the sun is begging to set upon them and the warm orange red glow in the sky is a perfect backdrop to their picnic.

They only have three blankets, and are all forced to sit somewhat close together as they cross their legs and balance plates full of protein on their knees.

"Cheers - to that annoying American friend of yours who bought the grill," Val says as she raises her bottle.

"Here here!"

Thor wasn't sure Loki would stay and dine with them, and fully expected that his brother's limits for social interaction were spent, but beside him Loki stayed. And when Loki finished his corn, he dumped the rest of his chicken on Thor's plate and stole his brother's.

Losing his corn is worth keeping Loki there, and knowing that he's eating.

"This is a nice space with that cliff and the view," Val says, gesturing to the edges of the backyard and the space beyond.

"I think some chairs would go nicely out here," Korg says, and Meik squeaks in the affirmative.

"You could hang some lights up on the gutters," Val continues, "put an actual table out here."

Thor swallows a mouthful of chicken and nods. "Those are nice ideas. And I want Loki to have a more comfortable place to read when he's out here. He spent the morning on one of these blankets keeping me company while I built the planters."

"Aw," Korg says, and from that alone Thor knows Loki is glaring at him.

"Wow," Val says, not bothering to hide her smirk. "That would certainly make me feel special and loved if someone wearing such fancy clothes sat on the _ground_ just to spend time with me."

"I wasn't on the _ground, _I was on a _blanket_ and I needed some vitamin D. That's all," Loki grumbles.

"You needed whose d?" Valkyrie repeats, pointedly turning her ear to Loki and pretending to mishear.

Thor chokes on his drink and Heimdall shields his amusement by taking a bite of steak. Korg says, "Oh my."

Before Loki can squawk at her, Val presses on. "Speaking of getting your clothes dirty just to get some d, Thor have you used those laundry machines yet?"

He's trying so hard not to laugh and simultaneously worried that Loki is about to commit a murder, but shakes his head to answer her.

"I plan to do some washing tonight though," he replies.

"I'll go with you, we can figure out how to operate them."

"I would be happy to help you as well, Thor," Korg says. "These blankets could use a rinse."

"Then let's finish up and get that done while there's still some straggles of daylight," Val says before draining her drink.

While the others carry plates inside, Thor lingers behind with his brother and hopes Loki isn't upset by Val's teasing.

"I have our dirty clothes in a laundry sack, but is there anything else you want me to wash while I'm down there?" Thor asks, trying to read Loki's body language.

"The sheets," Loki replies, and it's calm enough that he no longer seems enraged, and Thor follows him inside.

Their new sheets are gold satin, and Thor had offered no objection to filling their room with Loki's colors.

He leaves Loki reading on the couch when he and Korg head out to meet Val, and on the walk down the hill Thor spies two twin white flowers in the grass swaying slightly at the gentle breeze. There's nowhere to store them now, but Thor silently vows to collect them on the walk home so he can present them to Loki.

oooooo


End file.
